"Boys don't bitch", and other BS - anyone fancy some deconstructing?

[TheSmallClanger]

This thread is inspired by my male students, whose behaviour has been driving me nuts lately. I've put it here, because I really want a feminist viewpoint, and am totally up for going into massive detail. I teach male and female students, mostly in the 17-19 age range, and have made the following observations:

Behaviour 1: making up nasty and potentially damaging stories about someone's sexual conduct or sexuality, up to and including informing their parents.

Reaction to girls: how bitchy and nasty! They should be punished!

Reaction to boys: come on, that's not on, is it? I know it's only banter, but how would you like it?

Behaviour 2: (occurs in group of 3) repeated heated disagreements between pairs of students, up to and including fights, interspersed with apparent normal social behaviour.

Reaction to girls: girls are so bitchy, always blowing hot and cold with their friendships!

Reaction to boys: isn't it great how boys can be fighting one minute, then everything is forgotten the next?

I will be back with more. Anyone have any experiences or observations to share?

[MillyR]

I can only speculate on this based on personal experience. I would say that there is more fluctuation in girls' social roles with each other. Boys social roles towards each other are more fixed, which is actually a horrendous position to be in if you have been put into a subordinate social role.

The fact that fighting is 'forgotten the next minute' is actually a way of ignoring the role you have put someone in, and refusing to give them the opportunity to challenge why they have been put in that role.

Refusing to discuss an issues or acknowledge a problem is a classic form of dominant behaviour.