Men 'buying rounds'

[IDontLikeDisciples]

A very very petty concern but I wonder how you all deal with this?

The group of friends I socialise with all seem to think it is the mans place to pay for drinks/ snacks, even to the extent where men will sneakily get a round in before I get the chance to.

Then there are a couple of people who will only buy halves for the women, and worse women who will only drink halfs.

Does this bug anyone else?

I wouldnt drink a pint of beer personally under any circumstances and everyone I know already would know that.

Hi BIWI - some of my friends have a theory that (as long as you are tall enough to see over the bar) women tend to get served quicker. Depending on the barman of course. He might fancy you, or he might take pity on you. If the barman looks gay, send your prettiest male friend

I agree with the sentiment that everyone, regardless of gender, should expect and be expected to pay their own way.

I strongly object to 'and worse women who will only drink halfs.'

When I drink beer, usually in the summer, I only ever drink halves because I find it filling and don't know how much I am going to want. I find it offensive that you would judge a woman because of the quantity in which she chooses to drink. Not very 'freedom of choice', is it?

I drink halves (or glasses as they are called where I'm from) now. A whole pint at once just seems too much, and by the time I'm getting to the end it's all flat and gross.

I've had issues before with the English rounds system. It is a very complicated social ritual, and easy to mess up if you are not familiar. I've ended up with 4 or 5 pints sitting in front of me that I didn't know were mine, bought by people I didn't know I was in a round with.

Mostly I think it comes from a lovely, generous place but it can put people in situations where they feel obliged to spent more on drink than they want, or can afford.

Also some groups are arseholes - my cousin's ex, who didn't drink and so was always designated driver was expected by his friends to stand his round even though he was mostly drinking tap water.

trillian - agreed I would always go to bar in normal situations as I am a girl so get served really fast.

I also have 100% control of our finances so when we go out I would usually just pay with the card but all the money is the same money.

I agree with serendippy.

What's bad is the assumption that women will only drink halves, or the idea what women must only drink halves because it's unladylike to have a pint.

Women can drink whatever they like. Even bacardi breezers if they really want to.

spidookly I agree that it's weird to insist on buying everyone a drink whether they want one or not.

Yes Seren, totally agree.

I love the little canas you get in Spain - a tiny wee glass of lovely cold fizzy beer, then maybe another if you fancy. No commitment to sitting there for an hour while you bladder fills with wee.

'What's bad is the assumption that women will only drink halves, or the idea what women must only drink halves because it's unladylike to have a pint.'

I just see it for me as when I hold a pint it is like a man holding a 4 pint of milk and drinking straight from that but I am tiny.

I like the idea of those little Spanish glasses. They are nice as they are small and as you say you dont have to drink loads. I doubt my bladder could handle a whole pint lol.

God I would have been livid if someone automatically bought me a half of whatever I was drinking instead of a pint, especially if I had previously bought everyone pints! Fuck that for a game of prehistoric soldiers!

I have come across the situation where women in the group aren't "allowed" to contribute to the round-buying, but that has usually been where all the women present are in a couple and the other half is also present. When I have been out on my own with a social group (as a student, with my rowing club or whatever), no such petty chauvinism has occurred. However - if it is a large group, we have been known to "pair up" on rounds, to cut the costs and reduce the number of rounds.

Nowadays I tend to just buy my own, as do most other people. But I don't get out much now... and seeing that I'm in a different country, I don't know the people that well so wouldn't presume.

I very rarely drink pints but would resent anyone assuming that I don't. When out with friends and it is crowded we all tend to have bottled beer as it is easier to carry several bottles through a crowd than glasses, if the others are drinking faster than me I just skip a round.

I have noticed that with DH's old friends a tendency that if I offer to buy a round they all seem to feel slightly awkward about it, especially if I have been drinking less than them, but just have to go with it really.

I've never come across this men insisting on buying rounds thing, or the assumption that women only drink halves. I DO only drink halves however, because I hate warm, flat beer and I often like variety so I like more, smaller drinks. But I always have to make this very explicit to anyone buying otherwise I'll end up with a big fat pint.