Just picked up on this thread.
I agree with others on here who say that the term 'feminist' has become hugely undermined and denigrated over the last few decades. Every time the feminist movement achieves a step forwards, there is a backlash and I think we have been on the receiving end of one in the last few years, to the point where many women do feel uncomfortable using the f-word to describe themselves.
I have had similar situations with friends who agree with the principles but who find the words problematic. It also seems to be a common question for people who have recently discovered feminism and it's something I gave some thought to when I 'discovered' feminism properly a few years ago.
I came to the conclusion that, no matter what the term is, it would be denigrated in some way because those who are threatened by the principles behind feminism will always seek to undermine the movement, including whatever label it has (and, if there isn't a label at all, a negative one would be invented).
I call myself a feminist but do encounter a negative reaction to the term pretty much everywhere - in work, in my peer group, in my family. I always brace myself for the negative comments or roll of the eyes whenever I use the term!
However, I feel that not to use it is a betrayal of all that has been achieved in decades before and I am heartened by the knowledge that more and more women are now joining the movement and using the term.
I was at the FiL conference with Tabouleh and I agree that Finn's speech at the end of the day was inspiring and moving.
Using the word 'feminist' is nothing to be ashamed of and hopefully, if more people (men and women) use and reclaim the term, the power of the negative connotations that have been inculcated into people's psyches will weaken.
I read a book recently about the abolition movement that William Wilberforce led and the bile and vitriol that the anti-abolitionists spouted at the anti-slavery lobbyists was very similar to that which we receive today. It took 20 years to get the laws prohibiting the slave trade through parliament because of the resistance from those who had a vested interest in retaining it. It was interesting to read how the battles, the arguments and the power struggles, though different in subject, were very much the same in principle to the feminist movement.