I went out today in a shorter than knee length skirt and long boots...

[flyingzebra]

...it's been a while since I've dressed like that since I've been caught in the drudgery that comes with having two children in two years and being a little bit too fond of chocolated, and I haven't felt confident to dress that way in a while.

Anyway...back to the subject...

It shocked me the way pretty much every man I came into contact with gave me that really exaggerated up and down look - from the tips of my toes, up as far as my tits, then back down again.

Today, I just wanted to look nice. Not flirty, I wasn't in a miniskirt and bare legs - just a shorter than knee length skirt and black tights with flat boots.

Yet I feel like I was asking to be looked at by men I don't know, when I wasn't. I just wanted to wear something that wasn't jeans or trousers.

Aaaaanyway. I guess I'm just wondering how any of my fellow feminists dress?

How long were your boots? I generally have shorter than knee length skirts/dresses and slightly below knee length boots and no one ever gives me any kind of look.

Maybe I need to show more feminist tendencies and therefore not feel totally happy about being looked at and then maybe more people would

oh, i hate this. sometimes it is sooo much easier to not look good. sometimes it is easier to just be invisible. i hate the pervy looks i get when i make the effort to dress in clothes that flatter.

Men look at women who feel confident. You could be wearing a bin bag and if you look confident they'd still look. Women look too.

Sorry, that sounded snipy. Wasn't meant to .

Guess I am just feeling old and haggard

My boots were slightly below knee length, and flat noahandthewhale.

I was at a toddler music group so hardly dolled up like a dominatrix!

I wear shorter than knee-length skirts with long boots, and nobody looks at me like that.

Aaaaanyway, back to how I should have phrased the question, which I now realise is this:

If you are a feminist, and you know that dressing in a certain way is going to result in unwanted male attention, woudl you do it anyway?

I dressed like that in a driving lesson once and my driving instructor said 'Make sure you don't dress like that in the test.'

You can be a feminist and enjoy being attractive to men, you know . Feminism is not incompatible with sex...

Bonsoir are you a feminist?

flyingzebra - I am a feminist and if I thought my outfit was going to attract unwanted male attention I would think "fuck them, this is what I want to wear".

Can strongly recommend the hard stare and unsmiling face to discourage casual starers.

Absolutely, a feminist through and through.

It's a deeply unfeminist idea that women and/or their clothes are to blame for leery men. Remember the women in Afghanistan who used to be beaten because a man could see the sway of their hips/shape of their bodies from within their burkas ?

'If you are a feminist, and you know that dressing in a certain way is going to result in unwanted male attention, woudl you do it anyway?'

how long is a piece of string.... I don't think there is one feminist answer. Some will enjoy the attention, some won't but will think 'fuck it, I want to so I will no matter what anyone thinks', others wouldn't because they can't be bothered with the attention, others wouldn't because they just don't like dressing like that.
I reckon the only thing feminists would have in common as far as this question goes is that they would be cynical about any idea that they had to dress like that, if there was any pressure to do so.
I don't know any feminists who are guilt-ridden about how they dress and feel it is morally wrong to dress sexily.

Have only just realised what ToBeLaRone's name is. Am slow this evening.

I was once told I couldn't shave my legs if I was a feminist but that was by a bloke. Not a feminist. I don't think he knew what he was talking about.

To answer your question, I wear whatever I feel like wearing regardless of likely impact, etc. Sometimes I get a lot of attention even when I look shite which I find bemusing. Perhaps it is the confidence thing rather than the actual clothes? I do tend to stomp around like I own the place (regardless of where I am).

I know there is all kinds of shit about the way women dress - there is no right way really. So I have come to the conclusion that I should wear whatever I feel like - sometimes that means I have to be in the right mental state to do aforementioned hard staring.

Sethstarks you've just summed it up for me, I'm in the "others wouldn't because they can't be bothered with the attention" camp.

But it's been a long time since I looked like 'me' (i.e. not pregnant or post natal) and I thought I'd dip my toe into the water.

Then remembered that being fat/pregnant wasn't the reason I don't bother.

i will have to try that look

Flying I usually wear jeans/ trousers with v neck top long sleeve/ short sleeve/ jumper dependent on the weather so when I make an effort like I did today with just above knee skirt and knee high boots then YES people look at me . I'm not talking about men I didn't know staring at me but people who never normally notice me (I'm normally wallflower stylie) it's nice to receive compliments and looks. I find it a compliment rather than unwanted.