Has anyone changed their views on Feminism/women's role in society as a result of things they have read on here?

[Janos]

Because I have.

MN has been a real eye opener for me here. I would say that I had, in the past, always thought of porn (for example) as harmless and using prostitutes/going to strip clubs as just one of those things men do.

But after discussing it on here and reading round the subject, I've given the subject more thought, done my own reading round the subject and it's really affected me. Another example...I remember once stumbling upon a link which an ex boyfriend mentioned to me he had looked it. It contained images, words which really disturbed me. They were just horrible. I honestly had no idea this stuff existed before and was a real eye opener.

And a few threads on here too (recently) have provided a horrible insight into how some people's minds work. Specifically, I'm referring to the thread about a 12 year old rape victim. People were actually coming on there defending him. I couldn't believe it! My reaction when first reading about the case was 'of course..he would say that wouldn't he?'. And I came to MN expecting people would universally be thinking the same thing..which of course they won't.

And the casual objectification of women everywhere..now I'm in my mid 30s and I don't remember it being so bad when I was a teen. Thats not to say the attitudes weren't there then...just now they have a new outlet.

I feel angry about all this but at the same time pleased that there are people who care aboiut this sort of thing and want to fight against it.

So, thank you to everyone who cares about this kind of thing and is trying to make a difference. And for enlightening me. Keep going!

I feel we should have cake.

How I wish I knew a group of people like you IRL.

EAM, i know. wouldnt that be cool.

Yep, count me in for cake! :)

I agree, it's great MN have provided this space. Not many sites would.

I am intrigued by the idea that other sites wouldn't provide a space like this - whyever not?

i have always challenged casual misogyny and have been given a lot of stick for it ranging from being accused of being lacking in humour to outright hostility towards me.

this section feels like a very safe place in comparison to out there, feminism or women's liberation (and the liberation of all people including men) as I prefer it is under attack as never before from the voracious consumerism rampant in our society.

it's depressing. and this section uplifts me as a result.

i have always challenged casual misogyny and have been given a lot of stick for it ranging from being accused of being lacking in humour to outright hostility towards me.

this section feels like a very safe place in comparison to out there, feminism or women's liberation (and the liberation of all people including men) as I prefer it is under attack as never before from the voracious consumerism rampant in our society.

it's depressing. and this section uplifts me as a result.

I feel empowered when I come here. It is so good know other people just get it.

I could have written that OP Janos, and your additional post about how it "validated" things that were always there but you couldn't articulate. I have learned so much from this section of MN, even though I rarely post. I read and follow links and learn; and things make so much more sense in my mind.

I need to thank Dittany as well, it was her posts (and other posters too obv, but hers stood out) on a porn thread in AIBU that set me going on the path to feminism, she was excellent.

What I love about the feminist topic is that there is such a mine of information all polarized into one neat succinct area. . There was a brilliant book list about a year ago (not the one started by ribenaberry). Any idea where that one is, dittany? Think it was around 800 posts, but lost it after MacBook died.

Have to say, I have gotten more active politically in RL since discussing the feminism generally on MN.

Good on Dittany for starting topic, or rather asking for it to be a topic...

ilovemydogandMrObama, is it this thread of feminist book recommendations?
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/adult_nonfiction/753589-Key-feminist-texts-for-me-to-read-and-leave-lying

Yes! Thank you so much!

Janos, I completely and utterly agree with you

I have always held certain views, but never been able to articulate them

or, when I tried, because I hadn't thought them through properly, I would get shot down as a moaning old shrew or just clam up

now I don't care if I am thought of as frigid, boring, shrewish...in fact, I am positively liberated by it

I have picked such a lot up, about how to respond to casual misogyny, how to use that "really....< raised eyebrow >?" response to great effect because I am more confident that if someone argues shit at me, I can better wipe the floor with them

I also appreciate my DH a lot more, but that is another thread

The feminists on MN have made me think about things that I hadn't for years.

I was very openly feminist when I was a teenager (all that youthful hope and promise!) but I think i just put it all to teh back of my mind, and almost felt apologetic about being a feminist. There is so little mainstream feminist activity in the media. When i was a teen in the early 90s Cosmopolitan magazine was openly feminist, lots of articles on feminism, had Naomi Wolf and Andrea Dworkin interviewed, loads of articles about how to break down the glass ceiling in male-dominated professions. Then it turned inot a nonsnensical, sex and make up mag like all the others.

This place is great because I have learnt a HELL of a lot of stuff, and feel far more confident in being out and proud in my feminism, not only on MN but in the wider world. I don't think that I would have reinvigorated my feminist feelings if it wasn't for mumsnet.

yes AnyF - before i would have been conscious that to stand up for what I believe in would make me sounds shrill, strident, shrwewish.

Now I don't give a fuck. I will argue back. Shrill? I'll give you shrill, mate

sorry for appalling spelling etc

Also, I am a lot less judgmental of women's choices since I have been a MNer.

before, re SAHMs, I would have been dismissive, thinking lazy, etc. Now I just think good on you, as long as you are happy.

I'd like to add my thanks too, I think it's helped me strengthen myself and certainly enable me to take more control over relationships with various people in my life. I hope this in turn benefits my two sons.

at 'I'll give you shrill, mate' - I may have said something along those lines recently myself :)

I'm really chuffed this thread strikes a chord with so many of you.

GetOrfMyLand, I remember Cosmo being like that too, they used to have a fantastic book review section too (early 90s). Then a new editor took over and it went a bit shit.

It has been a bit a shock to realise that what I thought were common values, aren't (not sure if that makes sense)? Sorry to hark back to the 12 year old thread again ,but I really did assume everyone would be appalled by it and of course they weren't. Big big shock.

Am glad someone else remembers Cosmo.

There used to be a graduates/student bit every September, with really USEFUL stuff like how to write a CV, how to act in an interview, interviews with people high up in the Foreign office etc. It really made me feel that there was nothing I couldn't do.

But yes they got a new editor to replace marcelle D'argy Smith and it went completely downhill. There was nothing else like it - Marie Claire of the time was reasonably intellginet, and had articles about the role of women abroad, but nothing else had such a strong and proud feminist agenda like Cosmo.

To me, the feminist section on MN has been a breath of fresh air. As a student, I considered myself a feminist but had gradually become more and more disillusioned over the years, particularly in the 90's when it became apparent that women younger than me appeared to think of feminism as a dirty word and seemed to be embracing their own brand of neo-bimboism! I do feel that I also became complacent and less likely to challenge misogyny and discrimination where I did find it.
Interesting that some have said having children re-ignited their interest. I found it dulled it! Before I had children, I had a list of things I was going to tell my daughters about assertiveness and standing up for themselves. Well, I didn't have any daughters so I think felt a bit meh! about all my ideas, thinking I had no-one to tell them to. This section and others has given me the message that it's actually just as important, and maybe more important to tell my sons.
I was a bit at dittany saying that she hasn't particularly found her views on feminism haven't changed as a result of MN as I had sort of thought that dittany was feminism on MN! I have always thought you were the voice of wisdom on the relationships threads, dittany, the reasonable one who would point out that no, abuse of is not acceptable, not the norm and not to be tolerated.
I find, like others, that I don't always agree with you ( on trans-women, for example) but MN is a much better place for your presence here.

I LOVED Cosmo when I was in college. My aunt used to buy it and I used to read it when she was finished. But after I left college, I found it became just another glossy with piss-poor journalism. Deffo no striding!

It was 1995 when the new editor came on board - some daft bint called Nikki.

It changed immediately. I remember a brilliant article where people voted for their 100 top feminists throughout history. Imagine that in Cosmo today! Also, they interviewed really top diplomats, they were successful, hard working and intelligfent, albeit stern looking women. They wouldn't be interviewed in a glossy today without a prior makeover.

Such a shame that a magazine with a really strong and dynamic history to be proud of ended up being a load of trash like all the other glossies.