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Turned 40 and falling apart!

31 replies

Sosocold · 09/02/2026 22:27

I turned 40 last March and since then I've not felt well, no exaggeration. On my 40th birthday in St Lucia I came down with a uti/kidney infection which took months of anticibiotics to shift. I recently went away for business followed by a long weekend and it resurfaced.
I've had a recurrent ear infection since Xmas that again, I cannot shift. Seems like my body cannot fight things off.
I've been told I'm anaemic, thanks to the ridiculously heavy periods I'm having every 3 weeks (under the gynae for that and getting my second coil fitted after the first one I got last spring was a disaster as was fitted too low and caused horrendous back pain).
I feel knackered all the time.
This Friday/Saturday I felt really nauseous and so tired.
Some days of the month I'm so achey, especially in my hips. I'm pretty convinced I'm peri menopausal and my gynae has said about HRT which I'm hoping will help the uti issue.
Anyone else feeling like an old woman since turning the big 4-0?!

OP posts:
weewillywink · 11/02/2026 07:24

I found collagen helps with aches and pains. I know it’s not proven to work but it’s made a difference to me.

Chiaseedling · 11/02/2026 07:51

fucketyfucketyfuckerty · 10/02/2026 20:21

Oh and hormonal chin acne. I was never a spotty teenager, but THIS?! I heard peri described as going through puberty in reverse, and yup. Joyful.

I have exactly the same spots issue. I feel like a teen again. HRT made it worse - was told it was the progesterone.

Since 40 I’ve been collecting various chronic and serious health issues so zits should be the least of my worries, but they are really annoying. I’m post-meno and they’ve appeared since my periods stopped.

frenetically · 11/02/2026 07:55

Same. I turned 46 and anxiety and gut problems started. Gallbladder pains, foods just ran through me. Looking back it was probably anxiety more than anything else. Sleep was dreadful, waking in the night full of adrenaline. Teeth breaking down at the back. Then the tinnitus started. Ear infections. Weight gain.

Covid has definitely had an effect, It took months to get over each infection. Fatigue, no desire to do anything. Aches and pains off the scale. Slipped spinal discs. Every cold would turn into a long drawn out infection resulting in antibiotics for chest infections. Periods horrendous (still coming at 52). Abdominal pain, suspected cysts, Endo, adenomyosis.

Latest issue is a suspicious lump on my finger, currently awaiting ultrasound. Went to GP about, 6 days later severe backache, muscle cramped up and nerve pains, another flare of my long standing spinal issues.

I'm embarrassed at the amount of time I have off work, my manager must think im pulling a fast one all the time. One thing will flare up and just as I’m recovering something else will give.

There are days I think I must have cancer or something bad and at some points all these health issues will make sense.

That some amazing GP will join up all the dots and give me a diagnosis of something.

GustyGoo · 11/02/2026 12:43

So sorry op, that you feel like this, and everyone else posting but I must say it has made me feel so relieved that I’m not alone in this!
I went from rude health and fitness to feeling like an achy, sick, insomniac old lady with constant colds and viruses at around 41. Absolutely terrible mood swings and depression as well. I was immediately put on HRT after a hormonal blood test. And things are much better now. I’m 44 now. But it’s still a shock just how different I feel physically to my 20s and 30s.
Exercise helps, as does yoga and looking after myself. Alcohol is a killer! Which is heartbreaking for me as I love a drink! But now have to stick to just a couple.
Hope you feel better soon! 💖

GustyGoo · 11/02/2026 13:26

Me again, also meant to say that like you, this started with one UTI after another….. it got so bad I had to have a small operation to check if there were any obstructions in urinary tract. Pleased to say I haven’t had a UTI since I started on HRT.

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