What are “normal” periods like?

[queenofwandss]

Currently on my period and woke up at 4 with bad pain. I often am woken up from the pain and have been known to have middle of the night baths to soothe it, hot water bottles etc. I have always had painful periods and am currently in the queue for seeing a gynaecologist due to having other symptoms too for several years.

My question is “what is normal?” I don’t know whether I am gaslighting myself into thinking I am being dramatic and everybody suffers or whether everybody does really suffer?
Don’t need specific advice- I have tried all manner of contraceptive methods, supplements, exercise and things within my control. I just want to know if we are all missing work due to pain, waking up with it, having awful luteal phase etc etc?
Are we pathologising periods and finding medical problems when really it’s an infrastructure issue and we need to work around what many experience?

Missing work because of periods isn't normal. Neither is being woken by the pain. I used to have normal periods until I had my son at 36 and now they are fucking horrendously heavy and painful. Sorry you experience it like you do. Hopefully gynae appointment will help 💐

I have always had normal periods. Most months it is not painful as such, you could describe it as maybe, a bit uncomfortable at times. Some months are a little more uncomfortable with a slight back ache. Please see a doctor, you are not being dramatic.

Thank you. Mine slightly improved for a bit in my twenties after having the DC (it was amazing not having them while I was bfing) but now they are awful again. I hope yours settle a bit too.

I absolutely empathise with you op.
Mine were always heavy and painful, more so after my 2nd child to the point where day 1 and 2 where just days of literal surviving day and night. (Would happily give birth every month with no pain relief vs period pain)
However, when I talked to my sisters and friends I was honestly shocked that they can use just a panty liner for day 1 and 2 and then nothing more? And that their pain isn't literally debilitating and doesnt wake them throughthe night, as in, they maybe get a cramp or two and that's it?
I think there is more to it for us.... it shouldn't be this way

Mine were always bad but now after 4 c sections and a sterilisation, they're awful. The pain is the main issue. They are heavy but this is only for the first 3 days. If I " gush out" the period over the first 2 days, it tends to be shorter.
I get cocodamol on prescription which is probably not ideal for me to be taking long term but no other painkiller has touched the pain.

No not normal to be that painful.

Mine are light and only last 3 days (the last I could wear 1 towel all day if I wanted) Some cramping in day 1 and that is it.

My sister's both have ridiculously light periods like that and were honestly shocked at how awful mine are. Especially as they've got more kids than I have. It's really shit isn't it 😡

I’m sure you’re right. I am trying not to self-diagnose with things but I do think something is going on. I have been told GP is referring to gynae but no acknowledgement of that from gynae. I work in NHS so understand the long waits etc but it’s impacting my life a lot and I do hear others saying the same but genuinely started to wonder if it is just what we all have to deal with.

I have no idea what normal is.
I am another that was absolutely shocked my sister barely notices her period it's so light. Suddenly makes sense to me now when growing up she thought I was pathetic for finding them hard.

I have never not noticed my period! When they started at 11 they were heavy 2 week long painful affairs. The hormone drop would also make me vomit much like a stomach migraine. They diagnosed me with cyclical vomiting syndrome but never really investigated much.
Thankfully that stopped in my mid twenties.

I find it hard to walk very crampy I've bled through many times I gush and feel it all coming out. I've had it pour down my legs. Clots.
The bastards never stopped when I was breastfeeding. The first year after a baby I know I definitely can't do anything at all on my period because they are super heavy.

I've tried different contraceptive and pills. They don't help and essentially make me feel like I'm on the edge of a period all month long which is far worse than just getting it done with.
Mine also aren't regular in that they happen every month but will change when in the month each month. So I'm often caught out.

When I see those adverts and someone's rollerblading on their period I can't help but eyeroll that's so far removed from my experience of them.

OP

Painful and or heavy periods like you are describing full stop are not normal at all. There is a cause for this, It could be that endometriosis is the root cause of your symptoms; that is a common cause of ongoing and or sever period pains.

Periods should be manageable for women. Not heavy, not extremely painful to the point painkillers do not touch the sides, not having to writhe around on the floor in agony, no brown blood and or brown stringy bits (there is my 20 year old self right there and I was eventually diagnosed with endometriosis). This however, is usually diagnosed via laparoscopy which is a keyhole surgery op. Blood tests and internal ultrasounds do not readily detect it as these deposits are so very small.

If at all possible I would ask for a referral letter from your GP to see a gynae as a private patient. Stress the impact this is having on your day to day life. I suggest this because waiting lists for gynaecology in many areas are miles long and you could be waiting some considerable time before being seen.