Prolapse appointment gone wrong

[CharlesRydersMum]

I have a uterine prolapse- or at least I think I do. Dragging sensation, I can feel it against my underwear. Sex is very difficult, can't use tampons or mooncup anymore.

Have tried pessaries multiple times.

Saw GP who agreed could see it, as can DH.

Saw gynaecologist last year who could not but said it could have been "s good day". Referred for physio and did if no help they would operate.

Physio said pelvic floor time was 5/5, nothing more I could do.

Saw different gynaecologist last month. Appointment was at local hospital where I haven't been for 11 years since DS was stillborn. I wanted to take DH with me for support but he was working.

Gynaecologist could not see prolapse, said she could examine under anaesthetic but I have to get my BMI below 27.

I have no problem with this as I know I'm overweight and understand reasons behind it. I said this specifically to her. But i was upset and she asked me if I wanted to see a different gynaecologist; I said no, I had faith in her. Unfortunately I became a bit overwhelmed by the environment and disappointment and started crying, well, trying very hard to hold it in but it was obvious.

She specifically said "I can see you are being very restrained". It became too much and I rose, thanked her for her time and thanked the HCA on the way out. Like most people, I don't liked crying in front of strangers.

Then I cried in the phone to DH in the carpark for 30 minutes.

Fast forward to letter to GP in which she said I walked out and that it was probably best that I don't see her again.

I'm mortified. I was consistently polite and specifically said I trusted her judgement and thanked her.

When it was paper notes I had an infant loss sticker on the front. I don't know if that transferred to the online system.

I'm so embarrassed. What did I do wrong?

You did nothing wrong , you were just emotionally overwrought . I'm sure they have seen it before .
Can I just ask , why the physio did not work for you ?
I had just 1 appointment where she checked my pelvic floor exercises are being done correctly .
I had,also been advised to download the NHS Squeezy app to my phone to do them.
I have a bowel and bladder prolapse and have found regular pelvic floor exercises a help.
It's no quick fix , and you have to commit to doing them , and to keep doing them .
I've been doing it for 10 months daily , 3 times a day , which is at least 60 a day when using the app but to be honest I also do more than that .
How many were you doing , and how often ?
At my last gynae appointment I was offered an op , but at the moment I feel I'm managing with the pelvic floor exercises , but the consultant did write in their letter to the gp that it is an option .

Sorry, I don't think I was clear! Physio said my pelvic floor muscles were fullest strength so didn't need any input.

I'm religious about them too!

@Iclyn is the app produced by the NHS? The only squeezy app I can find is a paid one - is that right? I don't want to get the wrong one.

So why the prolapse ? Something has caused it .

Yes it's the paid for one . It was recommended by the nhs pelvic physio.

It doesn’t sound like you did anything wrong at all, don’t beat yourself up. I’m so sorry about your son, during the appointment you were in a vulnerable position, and no surprise you felt distressed.

10 pregnancies and 6 births I expect!

I’m so sorry for your loss OP and your difficult appointment. Can you afford a private physio? I had a “Mummy MOT” after second baby. NHS said I had to live with it for a year before I could even be referred for physio. Your pelvic muscles can be strong, but holding things in the wrong place, or under tension when you want to be relaxed. Mine gave me pelvic floor exercises but also went through posture, feet alignment, leg strength etc and gave me exercises for other parts of the body too. I found it so helpful and symptoms dramatically reduced. Such a weight off my mind to not think about it every time I moved.

You need to go back to your GP and get them to do an examination. Make sure to talk about your affects on sex, underwear etc and ask them to include that in the referral. Also our GP can check if there is a note on infant loss on your file and if not add one, and add one to the referral.

Also when they do the referral you can get the right to choose, so they'll give you a code etc and you go online and there's a list of hospitals to choose. You can see the waiting for that speciality for 1. Your first appointment and 2. Treatment etc, you can also look online, see consultants, sub-specialities etc. Then you can choose a different hospital, and then avoid the hospital from before.

If pelvic floor physiotherapy hasn't helped/your muscles are strong, then you likely need a pessary or surgery etc or some other medical/gyne options. There are different options depending on the grade if prolapse as well, if you want more info on this.

On the appointment, contact the hospital complaints system, the ICB or PALS, and complain about how she treated you when you got emotional, they lying on the letter of the appointment as well. Please complain, every doctor should be able to deal with patients, comfort them, support them, and not lie on a letter detailing the appointment (that gives them power over your record, and so everything must be truthful). If you need any help with what to write definitely ask on here, AI can sometimes be helpful, but don't feel bad or responsible.