IBS/Anxiety/Perimenopause

[PandaPop1234]

I've had IBS for 30 years and have managed it reasonably well. In the last few months things have got worse, with more flare ups and it not just being in the morning as it used to be.
My anxiety is through the roof, I believe this is linked to the fact my Dad is on a palliative care plan and we're facing some tough times. I have two brothers who I get no support from but my husband and my daughters are fantastic. I'm also in the second year of perimenopause. And to top it all we moved 25 miles in the summer back to my home city to be nearer my family so now have quite a commute to work and am missing the countryside where I've lived for many years.
After a bad flare up of IBS last week I've been signed off work facing tests to rule out anything else but I can't seem to get a handle on my anxiety. It's like a vicious circle - the anxiety makes the IBS worse and vice versa. I feel the lowest I have in my life and don't know how to be me again. Every day is a battle.
I'm not suitable to have HRT, GP doesn't want to prescribe anti depressants as they can make the IBS worse, I'm on a waiting list for counselling but it's long.
The only way I can describe how I feel is like when you were homesick as a kid, but it's ten times worse and there permanently. It's overwhelming. My mind never stops racing and overthinking which makes the IBS worse.
I feel like I'm in a hole that I'll never get out of and just wondered what advice you good people of Mumsnet could give.

Why aren’t you suitable for HRT? Things have moved on in that area now.

Saw the gynae in summer - family history of womb cancer ruled it out according to her

In what way is the GP saying the anti-depressants will make it worse? Mine made my IBS much better. Maybe because a side effect was inadvertently constipation (which let's face it, is preferable to being stuck in the loo for hours every day) but I'm not the nervous wreck I was before I started them either and we all know it's a vicious circle.

Try magnesium supplements, 2 every day an hour before bed and see if there is benefit in a week. Proven to help with both sleep and anxiety.

Also you could try supplements for the perimenopause. I'm currently awaiting a complex clinic review due to blood clotting disorder to see if I can have HRT or not, but I've just started a menopause specific supplement to trial for a month and see if that eases symptoms also

The magnesium though has been a good send since I started in February.

Which ones do you take?

Hi,

Thanks for the replies

GP said that anti depressants would likely upset my tummy more. I did used to be on sertraline when I had post natal depression and this was the case.

Magnesium sounds like a great option thank you.

I take Vitabiotic Magnesium which is a food supplement so less likely to interfere with stomach/iBS physiologically (actually mine improves because less anxiety, like the small anxiety I that became day to day - if I'm going out where is the closest loo - I don't seem to have worried about that for a while now)

And I've just started Hormone Harmony from Happy Mammoth. I'm 5 days in, my body aches seem to have improved already and I think I sense improvement of bloating this morning, but it's early days. It's not cheap but if it works then you can get discounts on subscription so I'll give it a month and see.

The one last thing I'm going to try is a 5:2 fasting diet with Nutriseed. This is because whilst I want to loose weight, I also know my body responds really well to high veg and fruit intake. It improves my IBS a lot and reduces associated lethargy. With nutriseed they send you 2 days of drinks/soups for the 2 days fasting and you do the rest yourself following healthier diet.

Again comes at a cost but, I really need to feel better all round so it can't hurt to try and the diet element I could do without the nutriseed stuff if it works and I can control the foods myself.

I'm trying to take control!

I'm 45 and estimate about 18mths in to perimenopause. It's not a short journey that's for sure.

Did you have a difficult birth when you had your child? Just because you mentioned you had PND. I had a 3rd degree tear when I had my son this year and they've said I could end up having IBS-y symptoms in the menopause. They've changed the way they check for 3rd and 4th degree years straight after birth in recent years so are picking more of them up. It's possible you might have had one that got missed maybe. Just something to check.

@Bubbles332

Hi,

Yes I had a bad birth with my second child, I was in labour for 27 hours, contractions stopped, I had an episiotomy and tore internally as well, had 23 stitches.

Never knew that was a thing but it was 20 years ago - thank you

Sorry you're going through such a hard time & sadly unlikely a supplement will solves all your issues, but genuinely this magnesium spray has really helped me with anxiety & insomnia amzn.eu/d/2U7mQW7

Oh also symprove for gut issues.. gut & anxiety is all linked.. also pricey but it's an investment I'm prepared to make these days. It works.

@driedapricots101

Thank you very much, I'll try anything

@PandaPop1234 I think it would be worth checking with your GP, especially if the IBS came on after you had your child. You'll probably need to have some horrible things done to your bum, sorry, but it'll be worth it. The thing you want is an endoanal scan to see if there's a sphincter defect. This would cause weakness which would worsen when your muscles atrophy in menopause. The treatment is similar to IBS- diet and lifestyle stuff- but you would also probably need strengthening exercises and topical bum oestrogen as well. And if there is a big defect they might think it's worth operating. The department your GP will need to refer you to is colorectal. Sorry you're having such a stressful time and about your birth xxx

@PandaPop1234 and the topical oestrogen isn't the same as HRT so it'll most likely be safe even if you can't have HRT.

@Bubbles332

Thank you again for taking the time to reply - very much appreciated and thank you for caring xx

@PandaPop1234 no problem! Sorry for the barrage of info, I feel like we don't get told things as women sometimes and end up having to share knowledge amongst ourselves.

If you end up having to wait ages for investigations, you can do pelvic floor exercises in the meantime. Even if it isn't the childbirth thing, they will help with any urgency you have by strengthening your puborectalis muscle. I bought a Perifit because I found endless kegels depressing and it's quite fun to play before bed.