I’m desperate for help.
I go through terrible episodes of extreme health anxiety and right now I’m in a dark hole. I can’t seem to get out of it and it’s terribly impacting my relationship and day to day life.
For background I nearly died in 2018 after a PE and heart attack. I was fit and healthy, training for a half marathon. I would say this is where it began but I’ve worked hard to accept it was bad luck.
Fast forward 6 years, I have dipped in and out of thinking I’m dying/self-diagnosing. But the last 6 months things have gotten progressively worse. I’ve had terrible back pains and some numbness in my foot at night. I’m convinced I’ve got some form of tumour on my spine. I’ve been back and forth to the GP. Told its reality of having a baby and c-section and told to go for physio. I’ve done the physio and no improvement. Went back to GP last week, not interested and diagnosed gastro issues.
I’m desperate for a scan, I’ve been Googling tonight private scans. My DP thinks I’m being over reactive - he’s never been to the GP during our 6 year relationship. We met after my PE. I don’t think he fully understands my health anxiety which results in me closing off and keeping it to myself. Although he’s supported me to go private for more cardiology investigations in the past. I get the sense he’s fed up of listening to me rambling on if I’m honest.
I’m battling as to wether it is health anxiety or wether there could be any truth to what I think is wrong with me.
I just hate living this way and forever panicking. I want to be a better role model for my little boy, I just don’t know how to shed the fear and constant worry.