Sex issues - tmi

[Tomorrowsanotherday24]

I’m wondering if other women experience the same as me.

I have been with my dp for 9 years, he is my first and from the beginning after sex I would always have a ‘fishy’ smell. It’s only when he has finished inside me, over the years of course I have realised this is purely only from the semen being inside me and I NEVER have this issue any other time - so there’s nothing wrong with me, no bv etc. it’s just the smell after the semens inside and will linger for a few days until it’s completely cleared out. There are odd occasions when this doesn’t happen after he’s finished inside, but if we have done it quite often then 100% it will be there.

do any other women experience this? It makes sense the fluids would create a smell, I tried using a bv gel pessary at night after sex and that stopped the smell. Is there a way to stop this? We did it 3 days in a row and the smell is very unpleasant now, I know it will be gone in a day or so but it’s quite embarrassing.

another thing - I don’t think I can ‘handle’ sex that well? 15 minute sessions seem to be the most I can really handle, unless I am extremely turned on/ovulating. I’ve always been a ‘quickie’ type, prefer it to be short and sweet. After around 10 minutes I just seem to dry up/my vagina can’t handle it anymore. Does anyone else experience this?

it leads me to wonder how on earth women can go for 1 hour + or multiple times a day. I remember friends telling me how they’d have sex with their partner 3/4 times a night! Or multiple times a day… HOW?! After doing it 3 days in a row my vagina hole is so sore (tmi).

anatomically there’s nothing wrong with me, it’s literally just the fact of having a rather large penis thrusting in and out, the skin around my hole has become sore and swollen. I physically can’t handle it that often.

HOWEVER if I’m ovulating? It’s another story. I want it every day and seem to have no problem.

is there something wrong with me??

Sounds like you’re not having enough foreplay to get you lubricated enough.

Might also be worth checking if your DH has thrush 🤷🏻‍♀️

Sounds like you're not turned on enough, so it's making you sore. Have you tried any lubricants to help?
No advice about the fishy smell. Does his semen smell when he masturbates? Is it a hum problem rather than a you problem?

Get some lube. I can't do marathon sessions either but am more comfortable with them if I'm lubricated.

The smell is normal though. Just have a rinse after or a wet wipe will prevent most of it after.

Thanks all!

its not a him problem, his semen doesn’t smell (just a mild normal smell) and he’s extremely healthy. It just seems to occur when it’s inside me? By tomorrow/Monday the smell will be gone but it makes me wonder if other women experience this/can you have sex and not smell anything after?

I agree I think I’m not turned on properly. I’ve noticed around ovulation I’m extremely horny and wet which makes sex so much easier/no soreness at all etc. I think I have issues as I can’t seem to get wet properly any other time/low libido?

Both normal things..some women are just more sensitive down? And u dont have to do what someone else does? Some like it long some short..honestly theres men that finish in 2 minutes.. u dont have to compare to the ones that do for hours and hours all night when theres those that do for 2 minutes 😉whatever works for you
Do try lubricants tho, theres no need to be sore specially u say hes on the larger side. He'll like it too if you worry he wont want that.
And no need to treat yourself with pessaries for something that isnt there.

I'm asking the obvious but you have a shower after sex,right?

Also,use lube.

I also get the fishy smell. No I don't get up to shower afterwards whoever said that, unless it is morning sex when I would shower anyway. I do however get up and have a wee and wipe with wet loo roll then dry because I read it's good to do that after sex. That definitely helps.
I don't know what causes it - I have no infection and the bv pessaries make no difference. We have been together for years and it's always been the same so to me it's normal.
I also don't want long sessions and always use Yes water based lube.

Hi OP. I get this if we have sex on several consecutive days. I read that it’s to do with the ph balance of your vagina and your partner’s semen and sometimes the two just tip over into causing the odour even without BV being present.

I try to have a quick rinse down there after sex which keeps it under control to a certain extent, but if we’ve had sex a few times in a row it isn’t always enough.

I’ve been tested for bv and don’t have it, but I do keep some Active Balance gels in the house as that does sort it out for me. I have also bought some probiotics that are meant to address the vaginal ph/flora but if I’m honest i haven’t taken them consistently enough to know if they work! They exist though so you can google :)

On the soreness, i’m older than you i suspect but vaginal oestrogen cream has been a game changer for me, both in terms of soreness and also in terms of how quickly I come from clitoral stimulation.

You can also buy vaginal moisturisers that i’ve seen recommended on the menopause threads here for the days you’re not using the oestrogen- I haven’t tried them but considering it as I do occasionally still get sore after sex even with the above, so maybe search out some threads on those too.