Hystorectomy help

[Cloudsandrainbows]

Hi all, I've suffered badly with endometriosis for years, and by chance following a smear the nurse noticed black spots in my vaginal canal, and subsequently I've been able to see a gynaecologist who has confirmed the black spots as endometriosis, but also found some endometriosis nodules. I've now been referred for an urgent hystorectomy and am waiting for a CT scan. I've been told it will have to be abdominal surgery and cannot be keyhole due to the placement of the nodules. It's a bit overwhelming, but I'm pleased someone has finally believed my daily pain and found a cause. However I am now in a panic thinking how I will cope after surgery. I haven't had a c section before so no idea what to expect with this kind of open surgery. I have 2 children to look after and have to drive them to school. I have asked for the surgery to be in the school holidays so I don't have the immediate worry of school run, but have no idea how long before I can drive, or what recovery will be like. The leaflet I was sent away with says 3-4 weeks but the NHS website says 6-8weeks! I also don't earn enough to qualify for sick pay, so need to be back at work ASAP. Is there anything i can do prior to help, or after to speed recovery, and essential items i need for my hospital bag? What would be the best underwear and clothing? What sort things will I be able to, or not be able to do around the house? Any tips or advise would be really helpful please! Thanks xx

My recovery was nearly 12 weeks but I got sepsis and had to go back to hospital for further surgery. They advise not to drive until you're confident that you could do an emergency stop and you also can't lift anything initially either (not even a full kettle).

Regarding what to pack - definitely take peppermint tea bags because you'll have lots of trapped wind afterwards which can cause pain, sanitary pads and massive but fairly fitted pants as these will provide a bit more support. Mine was a bikini line incision and I wore loose pjs or dresses after. Headphones/ear plugs are also very useful to block out the ward noise.

I hope it all goes well when the time comes.

Thank you @BeBraveAndBeKind that's really helpful. I will have to prepare for the worse and hope for the best!

My female consultant told me no lifting or even light housework, even though I will feel fine and think it will not be a strain, for 6 weeks. “Don’t so much as lift a cup off a table”! No driving as just using the pedals puts pressure on the abdominal muscles which are healing.

She also said never ever lift heavy washing above your head e.g. putting a wet duvet on the line.

Getting a hysterectomy was one of the best things I ever did. I still feel smug walking past the sanpro in the supermarket every week.

Thank you @Jantlet I hope I have that smug feeling one day and it's worth it for me too! I dread to think what state my house is going to be in after 6 weeks! I'm really stuck on how I'll get the kids to school if I can't drive for all that time! What about walking? Will I be able to walk a decent distance?

Who do you have around you who can help for a few weeks? The first few weeks at least you can’t reliably look after children .

My husband is going to take the time off while I'm in hospital to have the children, but he can't have much more than a week without taking unpaid leave. Seeing as I won't be earning that's not really an option. I have nobody close by, so was going to stay with my mum and take the kids with me, but when they start school again in September I'll have to come home! I don't have a date yet but have been told mid August. I can walk to school, but it's a long way, too far to expect my 4 year to walk, it's a good 45 minute walk, and there's no bus route close by

Everyone is different but walking took me a while to build up, and I usually walk a lot.

I think you’ll have to sort out some help with the school runs until you can drive again. It’ll only be for a short time.

Can your husband take paid holiday? Or can your mum or a neighbour/school mum help with the school run for a couple of weeks?

I’m nearly 4 weeks post my op and there is absolutely no way I could walk that distance twice a day. And I was really fit beforehand. And my recovery has been uncomplicated.

If you are having a full abdominal hysterectomy you will need lots of time to recover, you can’t rush it. Your body just won’t let you.

@Paq hope your recovery continues to go well! My mum lives a 45 minute drive away and works so wouldn't be able to help with school run. My husband has some holiday, but not enough for my whole recovery.
Our children both have autism, and my youngest is only starting school in September so it's a big thing! I think my only option might be taxis! Not sure how I'll afford it though with no sick pay. There are a few school mums I know but none with a mini bus that could take my children as well as their own, plus I couldn't expect them to handle my youngest.