Pain after sex following hysterectomy.. A&E doctor unsympathetic and said was normal

[queenofthedryshampoo]

I had a total abdominal hysterectomy at the beginning of November. On Wednesday night I had sex for the first time and although it wasn't too painful at the time, afterwards I was bleeding and started to get severe abdominal pains. My boyfriend had to leave to drive overnight for work so I was on my own. Over next few hours the pain got worse, I felt sick and dizzy and ended up calling 111 around midnight as I was getting worried I'd done some internal damage. They made decision to send an ambulance. I was in A&E all night, had blood and urine tests but no examination of my belly and no internal examination. Pain was still really bad despite oramorph. Eventually doctor came said nothing wrong with me, normal to have pain after sex after hysterectomy! I said really? This much pain, bleeding and watery discharge 3 months later? ? She shrugged and said yes, I could go now and that was it. I feel so miserable today, I hate wasting peoples time and all the A&E staff were so cold and unsympathetic...I feel like a time waster. I am upset I didn't get a proper examination. I'm still in pain and scared now I can never have sex again if this is what it is going to be like. I guess I'm just looking for some reassurance it will get better..I'm not ready to give up on my sex life just yet. Did I waste the hospital's time?

That’s A&E’s function to rule out the serious causes then send you back to GP to test for the others. Hope you find out what’s wrong soon.

I haven’t had a hysterectomy but had a complicated ectopic years ago, and had similar pains and trouble for a few months after. Told it was normal too, and to be fair it did all settle. I can’t now remember how long it took to resolve but probably a few months. Hope you feel better soon

@TotallyWhatever thank you that's reassuring to hear it did settle over time.

I had a TAH in early September and intercourse about 7 weeks afterwards with no pain or bleeding then or since. Can you get a follow-up appointment with the gynaecologist? I had one around 8 weeks post-op.

A&E are just going to patch you up and send you on, they’re not going to give you answers. You need an appointment with your gyne consultant or GP.

For what it’s worth I haven’t had a hysterectomy but have had some gyne operations and it did take a while for

sorry, posted too soon:

… did take a while for things to settle down. But saying that, I don’t think it was months and months. I’d book an appointment just in case it takes a while to come through (and wait a bit longer in the meanwhile).

I'd say that was perfectly normal after a major operation. Took ages after my section to feel right again. I think you need to adjust your expectations. Some people will be back in the saddle early but an awful lot won't be. Presumably you used lots of lube and went very slowly?

I had a hysterectomy and bled quite a lot after intercourse, even after quite a few months' wait. It turned out to be granulated scar tissue where my cervix was. I had it treated with silver nitrate which was quick and painless, and it hasn't happened since. I hope you get answers and are okay.

@MrsPelligrinoPetrichor we did go slow and gentle but didn't use lube which I definitely will next time. I was advised no sex for 6 weeks so I thought by12 weeks would be OK and I had felt pretty much fully recovered and wasn't in pain until now. As I am still in a lot of pain today I will make a GP appointment...although that is not straightforward at the moment

I had that problem after my hysterectomy - I can’t remember how long after and how long the painful episodes carried on for. I feel for you op, I remember the pain being so bad that I was curled on the floor and unable to breathe or move - it was worse than contractions. Dr couldn’t find anything wrong.
10 years down the line and I had totally forgotten until I read your post.

If you've had a hysterectomy then you're now in menopause. And it's a total menopause, rather than a slow decline of hormones over peri-menopause.

That means sex may well be painful. You may need more estrogen, for example, which you can take as a vaginal pessary or as a patch, depending on what you need.

I'm so sorry you didn't have a good experience at A&E, but this is something your GP can fix for you.

You definitely need an internal examination,I cant believe they didnt do one in A and E, you could have ruptured the cuff. You need to be examined to rule out actual damage and then if everything is still healing fine, to discuss if you are having vaginal atrophy or something else that needs addressing

Only immediately in menopause if ovaries removed.

I had a TAH too, but no oophorectomy, so retained ovaries but had uterus and cervix removed. That was almost 10 years ago, but don't think I'm menopausal yet.

Sorry, no advice on the bleeding, as I didn't experience it. Hope it goes well with the GP.

@SeaToSki I was really perturbed they didn't even do an internal examination as a ruptured cuff was what I was really worried about. I am on HRT and have been for a while as I was on decapeptyl injections for six months before the op ..I've had ovaries and fallopians tubes removed as well. Can't get a GP appointment today...none available and will have to ring on Monday. Hopefully my insides won't drop out in the meantime

Are you running a temperature at all? Is your stomach unusually hard? Can you find out what your blood pressure, heart rate and breathing rates are? If you can, keep an eye on all of them until you can be seen in person. If any start to go out of whack you need to get straight to an in person appointment somewhere and insist on a proper exam.

When you do see someone medical, advocate for yourself really hard and if you need to, take someone in with you. You ideally need ultrasound of your abdomen, but at the very least a very gentle but thorough internal exam by someone who knows what a damaged cuff feels like

@SeaToSki thank you x my obs we're all normal at A and E and I don't feel feverish. My stomach is tender not hard. I feel ok in myself apart from the pain which now feels like I have been kicked in the belly...it's worse if I walk about. I will definitely contact 111 again if I feel like things are getting worse but will try to get GP appointment next week as I really, really don't want to go to hospital again as was such a dispiriting experience..i don't cry very often but I was in tears as I walked out ..from the pain and being made to feel like a time-waster...no-one cared. I think the poor staff are all so burnt out tbh.

You poor thing, can you afford a private consultation with a gynecologist? It would probably be 120 to 180 pounds? You can self refer and they would likely see you urgently..then if you need anything done you can be put straight back onto the NHS with a proper diagnosis of what needs doing.

@SeaToSki thank you x yes I am considering this. I can't really afford it but the NHS is just too overloaded at moment I fear.

See your GP, it'll take a few weeks probably but get an appt booked in. You probably need some topical hrt gel as well . Get some YES lube which is water based so won't irritate. Honestly though, don't panic, it's really early days and I think the 6 weeks timeframe is extremely optimistic by anyone's standards.

You can find one by googling the specialty and private and your town. Then look up their profile (on the hospital or clinic website) and see what they specialize in, pick someone who does hysterectomies. Then call the appointments line and see if they can fit you in early next week. If you do it today then you have saved the weekend and if the GP sees you in Monday and is actually helpful then you can always call and cancel the private appointment.

Thank you both xx