Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Women's health

Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have medical concerns, please seek medical attention.

Flip

Original poster

transvaginal ultrasound

22 replies

lpkojihu · 01/09/2021 01:57

Got an appointment for a transvaginal and transabdominal ultrasound. I've had pelvic ultrasounds before but at a different hospital and it said in the appointment information that they don't do transvaginal scans if you've never been sexually active. Does anybody have any idea if that's a standard NHS thing? Googling, I can see a few hospitals say the same on their websites but not the one I'm going to.

It stresses me out enough to have to discuss my (lack of) sex life without not knowing whether they'll go 'you can still have the scan' or not. Feel like cancelling the whole thing.

OP posts:

LaBellina · 01/09/2021 02:04

I would want to know first what the reason is that they won’t do it in these cases.
If there’s no medical reason, I probably wouldn’t even mention my sex life as if it makes no difference to you, it’s really none of their business. It’s your body and you’re entitled to privacy.

Original poster

lpkojihu · 01/09/2021 02:11

I don't want them to do the scan. I just want an abdominal ultrasound like I've had in the past. Fine with saying 'never been sexually active' if that's the end of it but if they're going to turn around and say I can still have it, it's up for debate, I'd rather not go.

OP posts:

Namechangenumber23 · 01/09/2021 02:12

Truly cannot tell you if it's standard.
I have had a few of these over the years and not once has my sex life been discussed though, I only ever had them in the years after I had my son and it's likely clear on my notes that I have given birth so they could very well have skipped that bit though this is purely a guess on my part.

They explained the procedure, confirmed that I understood/was happy with what they had explained, (also asked if I have any concerns/questions and usually includes an overview of the reasons I was referred / my gynae history) followed by consent to proceed. At each step of the process they check I am ok and comfortable. I found each experience professional and respectful.

LaBellina · 01/09/2021 02:16

I think you just need to be firm and say:
“I feel very uncomfortable about the idea of this type of ultrasound for personal reasons that I rather not go into any further. I would like to know if there’s an alternative available so I can choose this. “

You’re completely entitled to say no to them wanting any explanation from you about why you don’t want it. It’s your body and no is a complete sentence. But I think you need to think about what you want if they have no alternative available and this type of ultrasound will give the best results.

Namechangenumber23 · 01/09/2021 02:20

OP, only speaking of my experience and I entirely understand why you would not want to proceed. I think in your circumstances, it's hugely understandable to want to have all the facts prior to make an informed decision and I think you'd be reasonable to make contact with them ahead of the appointment to ask if one if the team can speak to you to answer a few questions. I work in a different area of the NHS and we can and will do this for patients.

KicksLikeASIeepTwitch · 01/09/2021 02:28

it said in the appointment information that they don't do transvaginal scans if you've never been sexually active

I am surprised that they are not giving patients the choice but that said, this is dildo cam we're talking about - one of my DC who is still a virgin, would be totally freaked out by it. She uses tampons but there's a big difference between a tampon and a transvaginal probe.
I had my first aged 40 and despite having given birth and having had smear tests, still found it embarrassing and invasive - so I cannot begin to imagine how my daughter would feel.

KicksLikeASIeepTwitch · 01/09/2021 02:29

Similarly, iirc you cannot have a coil fitted unless you have given birth.
There must be some reasoning behind both these decisions.

NiceGerbil · 01/09/2021 02:30

Do you have smears?

Way way easier than that.

NiceGerbil · 01/09/2021 02:32

No it wouldn't be suitable for a virgin obv.

I'm sure patients can refuse I mean they can't make you.

It's not half as bad as a smear.

It's thin like a wand not like a dildo!

LaBellina · 01/09/2021 02:37

I had my first aged 40 and despite having given birth and having had smear tests, still found it embarrassing and invasive - so I cannot begin to imagine how my daughter would feel.

^^ I had my first during pregnancy, felt exactly the same way.

Moooncake · 01/09/2021 03:12

I had a TV ultrasound and they asked 1. If I was sexually active and 2. If I was happy to have it. If I'd said no to either they wouldn't have gone through with it.

Don't cancel, just let them know when you're in the room and politely decline if they offer it anyway (I highly doubt they will, but it's nice to have a plan if you're anxious).

Original poster

lpkojihu · 01/09/2021 03:14

No, never had a smear.

My worry is that I'll have to refuse and be firm and all that. I don't want to debate it. If they'll potentially do the scan, I'd rather cancel and try to get referred back to where I've been before, because I know they won't do it.

make contact with them ahead of the appointment to ask if one if the team can speak to you to answer a few questions

Who would I speak to? The only contact I have is an email for the ultrasound booking people. I did wonder if they'd be able to answer the question if it is a standard procedure thing.

OP posts:

Anon778833 · 01/09/2021 03:20

@KicksLikeASIeepTwitch

Similarly, iirc you cannot have a coil fitted unless you have given birth. There must be some reasoning behind both these decisions.

With a coil it's because your cervix needs to have opened up in order for them to be able to put it in.

Op, I don't blame you for not wanting this. I can't see that you would face much opposition surely?

wishfuldreamer · 01/09/2021 03:25

If you don’t want it, you don’t have to have it. You can request an abdominal/pelvic one instead but there might be medical reasons why they aren’t enough and the TVU is being suggested? I have ovarian cysts abd have a scan once a year or so and they do a pelvic one first but can never see enough so ask if they can do a TV one. But no one has ever told me I have to and they always seem pretty sensitive to how difficult it might be for some people.

I would ring and ask. You don’t have to explain why - could be for many reasons other than not having had sex. They may explain clinical reasons for it and why a pelvic one won’t be enough, and I would guess at that point you can decide how you want to proceed?

Willthewashingeverend · 01/09/2021 03:27

@KicksLikeASleepTwitch you can have a coil when you haven't given birth...ive had one and know a lot of other women who have. It can just be more uncomfortable/painful to have put in as your cervix hasn't opened before.

OP, this isnt standard procedure in all hospitals. I assume it is because it would be more uncomfortable. I would ring the department and ask why and ask why their policy states that.

Anothermountain · 01/09/2021 03:27

Please don't cancel op.

I've had transvaginal scans because I had fibroids and an ovarian cyst and it's easier to see and more accurate measure those structures that way. I didn't find the scans particularly uncomfortable or painful and I was very grateful to be able to have them because it meant I was able to avoid potentially dying from ovarian cancer.

I'm not a doctor but I would have thought the reasons behind the questions about your sex life relate to basic biology? I imagine you can't have a transvaginal scans if you are a virgin as the hymen might get in the way.

I understand you are uncomfortable answering these qs but they are being asked them in the context of a confidential medical examination with a professional who is not judging you in any way, who is only interested in providing as high a quality picture of your insides as possible in order that your consultant can make an accurate diagnosis as possible. Bluntly, in your shoes, I would try and overcome your embarrassment so you can get the best treatment possible.

I'm sorry if this sounds harsh, but I lost a good friend to cancer last week. If the disease had been caught earlier, they would still be here with us.

Good luck

MojoJojo71 · 01/09/2021 03:30

Sonographer here, we also have this policy and would usually ask prior to the scan to be sure. However, please remember that this type of scan requires your consent and if you don’t want to have it you can decline for whatever reason and you don’t need to tell us what that reason is if you don’t want to. If you fell comfortable saying ‘I’d rather not thank you as I’ve never been sexually active’ then we would not question you any further

JinglingHellsBells · 02/09/2021 14:08

@lpkojihu The reason they ask is that the scanner is likely to be uncomfortable for any women who has never had sex.

It's not huge- it's about the width of a large finger.

But that's why they say they can't use it on virgins or children.

I have had lots of these and in all honesty, it's nothing to be worried about.

They are always very gentle and careful not to make you feel embarrassed or uncomfortable. They also give you a gown or a cover to cover yourself with other than the area below the knees.

GinIronic · 06/09/2021 00:16

I was once booked in for TVU and an abdominal scan for fibroids and possible ovarian cancer. I refused the TVU and the sonography just did the abdominal scan. No drama. It’s your body. Any exam or procedure can only be performed with your clear consent.

EndoWarriorQueen · 08/09/2021 17:33

Completely understand why you don't want to have one and on my form I had to sign before one it does say it's okay to say no they understand all the reasons that women might want to refuse, they'll be really understanding don't worry ❤️

I would say they may have their reasons for sting to do one... I had both a pelvic and the transvaginal... my endometriosis wasn't spotted on the pelvic one but was easily seen on the transvaginal.

The process isn't pleasant I'm not going to lie but I'm so glad I had it, it did hurt for me but thats purely down to my endometriosis, they are very gentle and considerate. When I went for mine it was done by a young mar trainee and first my heart sank, but it meant I got two people looking for problems on the screen as the main consultant popped into check. Obviously if this happens to you they are fully understanding if you refuse, I think the young man thought I was going to refuse with being fairly youngish myself but I've gone through that many different tests and scans now I was just grateful for the extra pair of eyes so nothing was missed ❤️

Definitely don't cancel when they do your abdominal they will speak to you about the transvaginal one anyway you can voice all your concerns and they are fully understanding as to why women don't want one.

I've had 2 now unfortunately, my first was when I was 22 and my second now I'm 31.

emmathedilemma · 09/09/2021 10:01

I had one and they never even asked about my sex life! I went for an abdominal scan but they couldn't see everything clearly so the vaginal one was sprung on me. I also had a coil fitted and I've never given birth.

eurochick · 09/09/2021 10:26

I've had dozens and nobody ever asked about my sex life but as they were related to fertility treatment I guess they just assumed...

They are nothing to be worried about IMO but you have the right to refuse any medical treatment for any reason so just decline it if you don't want it.

Flip