Episiotomy healed wrong?!

[Lucasmummy2021]

Hi

Hoping for some reassurance about my situation! Had my little boy 5 weeks ago with forceps and episiotomy. Found the birth really traumatic and left with aches and pains pretty much everywhere.

I've been passed back and forth from midwives to my gp and nurse. Yesterday, after a week of 2 antibiotics prescribed by my gp, I had a review from the nurse who said part of my episiotomy wasn't healing. She spoke to a gp who said to refer me to gynae via my midwife. Midwife said she couldn't do that as no longer under midwife care. Gp said to go to A&E! Really couldn't face that so ended up phoning MAU who told me to go in and be checked by a doctor directly.

Doctor has said that the episiotomy wound has healed, but not come together right, so I have inside skin exposed that needs to harden and become outside skin. I've never heard of this? I've read lots of posts about people having open wounds which need to granulate but this sounds different? Has anyone experienced this kind of healing?

He said it would take months to improve and not be sore, otherwise I'd need to be recut and restitched which I can't bear the thought of.

Also I still feel very bruised in my bum, can't sit comfortably and going to the toilet is sore (pelvic floor muscles/heavy feelings etc.). Dr said nothing like that should still be an issue from the birth I had 5 weeks on. I feel like I've read lots of people still feeling a lot of discomfort in this way for longer than 5 weeks?

I've been so down, crying every day both about the pain and just feeling like I've completely lost myself and will never feel better. I feel so guilty, like I'm ruining the first months with my partner and our baby boy but I can't get past the trauma and worry.

Really hoping for reassurance this is all common and will get better!

An you poor thing! I remember that feeling exactly. The not healing and the loo issues just make you feel so down and you worry all the time that something’s really wrong.

Keep bothering doctors for examinations. I does gradually get better, but can take a while. Don’t be scared about asking for it to be monitored.

I had issues with pain and constipation for a while, but they completely resolved over time. Get a big bottle of lactulose (stool softener) to help. I had to take it for months but everything eventually went back to normal.

I had a forceps birth and an episiotomy that broke down too. I was in pain on the skin there for quite a while - a good 2-3 months while it healed. I have a couple of skin tags where they did the stitching, but even though right after the birth I was devastated by that, now I’m not bothered by them at all. I mean I really really don’t care about them now! 😂

It will definitely get better - but it really feels overwhelming when you’re experiencing it.

Mine was a bit like this. It had healed properly but it hurt for a long time. I had another set or antibiotics at about 4 months post partum and that seemed to sort things out but it is still an occasionally tender area now and I've since had a second easier birth with only mild stitching and no episiotomy. That was only 9m ago and healed really quickly where as I can still feel my epi scar when I have period cramps or after sex now (4 years...)

Keep asking the dr but also give it some time and maybe get the support of a women's health physio too?

Please ask your GP for a referral to a gynaecologist.....don't leave it like I did...til the baby in question had started senior school (I kid you not).

The gynaecologist was fantastic and yes although I needed surgery it has healed far better and I am now pain free and at far less risk of a prolapse than I was before.

I was also given the new skin needing time to toughen up spiel. It never did.

Congratulations on the birth of your LO. Be kind to yourself. It sounds like the birth was very hard on you and the hormonal changes can be a b!t€h! With the extra pressures of sleepless nights, feeding etc and this pain it is no wonder you are feeling lost

I hope that your DP is being supportive and that you have explained to him how you are feeling. If not, please do. You aren't alone in post partum problems. It is just that it isn't really talked about. I have been watching Laura Clery on YouTube who has recently delivered and having had a fantastic first birth has really struggled with her 2nd and is trying to normalise different experiences.

Gentle hugs to you.

Thank you for the replies. My partner is very supportive, does everything he can, keeps telling me we'll get me sorted and back to myself, that I don't have to worry he's never going anywhere etc. But it just feels hard to believe when so many women seem to have such problems accessing the right care or find good doctors. It's a struggle just to get a GP appointment! I tried last week to book my 6 week check and was told to ring today. Today I was told to ring next Monday. I'm going to go to a private physio and if I'm still having problems with the episiotomy in a few months I think I'll have to find a private consultation for that too. I find I'm more bothered by the bruising type pains atm (including my clit?! ) but I am worrying that when it comes time to try and return to 'normal' life my episiotomy might be a problem - no way feel near ready atm!

After my first birth and difficult healing I didn't have PIV sex until 7 months post partum. I just wasn't ready. Don't rush into anything and listen to your body when it's asking you to slow down and rest so you can heal.
6 weeks is very early days. Lots of rest and lying down when possible to take the pressure off. Warm baths and that "spritz for bitz" on a pad both helped me too.

How are you getting on OP? Exactly same position :(

Sorry to hear you're struggling, how many weeks pp are you?

I'm happy to say I'm a lot better. I saw a women's health physio who recommended a product called medihoney. I used it on my tear and episiotomy and both healed and in fact, you can hardly even see they were ever there! They looked so awful, with bright red lumpy scar tissue, I never imagined I'd be saying that.

I'm back being able to do everything I did pre-baby which honestly I couldn't imagine would happen at the time either! I still have a bit of tenderness in the scar tissue not gonna lie, but it doesn't stop me doing anything and hopefully time will continue to heal.

Hope this helps, I was in such a dark place and didn't believe I'd heal. I wouldn't go through it again though! Can't say I've found 'you'll forget all about it' to be true 😂

Thankyou so much for replying. So glad you’re feeling better- I will definately never forget how I’m feeling either. It feels like I’ll never be able to do things again.

im 7 weeks post partum. 4.4kg baby by forceps and episiotomy with third degree tear. It opened up on the second week but since then has been healing, except the part right at the top where the vagina hole is. So my hole looks like a big V now and I don’t know if it’ll ever heal.

ive also found heavy sensations and am convinced I have prolapse. Seeing a pelvic floor therapist at Kingston hospital next week and have been doing my kegels whilst sobbing 3 times a day for the past week but petrified this tampon stuck in the wrong place feeling will never go.

Aww honestly I remember the pain and anxiety so well. Meant to say it wasn't until around 4 months pp I started to feel considerably better so it can take a lot longer than the magic 6 weeks they lead you to believe! I had sex 5 months pp (which was fine!) and at 3 months I'd have thought that was impossible so it just shows once things improve it can be a fast improvement.

You're doing the right thing seeing a physio, I also thought I had a prolapse but never did. I think the heavy feeling is really common. I remember thinking I'd never be able to laugh, cough or sneeze again without feeling like my insides were going to drop out - it does all get better.

I'd highly recommend the medihoney for your wound, I genuinely think it made a huge difference. It's antibacterial, promotes healing and improves scar tissue. I'll try and find the link where it's discussed on a maternity hospital website.

Be kind to yourself and hope you have lots of support at home. My partner kept promising me we'd get me better - though I didn't really believe him! x

I can't seem to get the link to paste here but if you Google Perineal Care Milton Keynes Hospital then it's halfway down their page 🙂