For anyone who has had episiotomy refashioning

[Muuuuuummm]

Hello, I am going to have an ablation for heavy bleeding soon. I have asked if the consultant can do something about my episiotomy scar at the same time as it is painful to have sex and it splits slightly. He has agreed to see me tomorrow to look and discuss with me although he has already stated that he thinks it is unlikely that any perineal surgery would be required. I dont know if this means he is going to say I need to put up with painful sex for the rest of my life or if he is going to suggest a different solution.
So I'm coming here to ask about any of your experiences with this situation.
I am in my late 40s and have put up with it long enough.
Thank you x

nothing constructive to input, OP, but my sympathy.

I think that there should be a LOT more focus on tear/epi stitching in midwife training. It's a crucial part of the process, not an afterthought!

Hope you get a solution. Please let us know how you get on in the consultation.

I had on my notes that I would only let a Doctor do them, copied it off someone else’s offline 🙈
Turns out I was practically cut in half by a Doctor anyway so he did stitch it back up. Not sure how it would have gone down if I nurse tried to stitch me, whether they’de have refused or not?
Anyway, it was done well I have to say.

Thank you, I will update after I've seen him tomorrow. I think I was stitched up by a student. It seemed to take for ever and was far more painful than the birth itself. It took weeks and weeks to recover from that part. I have had 3 births since that didnt need episiotomies luckily. Day to day it doesnt really bother me so I know it could be a lot worse but penetrative sex is a problem and that makes me sad. I would love to be able to sort this out.

Oh if I had known I would definitly have done the same. Who would agree to a student going at your foo foo with a needle and thread. If only I had considered the possibility of such a crap job being done!!!

I had terrible episiotomy scar tissue stitches after my second birth. Before my third I asked my obstetrician if he could repair it after the birth. I have no idea who did the first lot of stitches but it wasn't someone who knew what they were doing that's for sure. My last birth was private hence having an ob at the birth but I highly recommend finding someone experienced to sort it out, it's worth it

I'm pleased to hear you had a good job done on yours. I really hope that's the case for most people. I have read some horror stories though that make me feel a little embarrased to be complaining really.

Sorry Atrixie I was responding to the previous poster before. I'm so glad you got yours sorted out. If I get no joy with this surgeon then I will look for a different solution. Thank you x

I had some corrective surgery, as part of a much bigger procedure, to my vagina and perineum. I can’t say that it looks great but it’s a lot more ......functional . A healthy happy sexy life was very much a concern for her when advising on my treatment, whereas previous doctors took more of a well what do you expect line....

I hope you get the same sort of consideration tomorrow.

Hotcarrots I fear that this consultant might be in the "what do you expect?" camp which pisses me off. I already plan to ask him if he would put up with it if someone cut into the side of his penis during a procedure and stitched it in such a way that every time he penetrated his wife the scar would pull and split. I really hope I dont need to ask but hope I feel brave enough to if necessary

Can I ask if your scar was cut and restricted or something else? I've heard of Fenton procedure but dont really know what it entails.

If the consultant says that he cant make it any better I would quite like anecdotal evidence that it might be possible.

Update:
Well he was very nice about it all. He says he can operate but he would rather do it as a last resort as sometimes the scar tissue from a refashioning can make matters worse even though he says he has had success in the past. I am going to try a vaginal dilator 😳 and oestrogen cream first to see if that helps and he is going to inspect it further on Monday when I'm under anasthetic. He says he will be seeing me for follow up appointments and we can decide to have something done at a later date if necessary. So that sounds fair I suppose. I dont really see how it's going to work but I'm willing to give it a try. I had never even heard of a vaginal dilator before!!!

Sorry @Muuuuuummm I’ve only just seen this. My scar was the result of an episiotomy/instrumental birth with my first and then tearing with my second during an unattended birth I had surgical repairs for both. During my last procedure there was an incision the length of the back of my vagina so that was just continued a little. I have to say that afterwards the entrance to my vagina is very different and it’s generally important to pay attention to the “angle of attack”

But I’m glad you got somewhere with the surgeon. Vaginal dilators aren’t that bad. But not necessarily sexy fun time. Get some good lube. And a second opinion if necessary.

And I wonder, without fully understanding the situation, if maybe those oh-nut things might help during sex for you in the meantime?

Thank you for your reply. What is an oh-nut thing? Also have you used a dilator before. So much to google!!!!

@Muuuuuummm

This is the oh nut thing-
www.sh-womenstore.com/ohnut-for-comfortable-penetration.html

I’ve not used them but they get a lot of good reviews. Maybe they would take the pressure off a little bit?

I’ve not used a dilator before, but I definitely had to practice with toys before I could have piv sex again. For me, I basically had to start from scratch again because things didn’t work like they used to

Thank you, they look fun. They should definitly make ones wih a squeaker in them. All I've read about dialators is to open the whole vagina. I'm happy with my vagina in general its painful scar tissue at the entrance that splits during sex that's the problem. I'm prepared to give anything a go though. So we shall see. That nonut thing might actually help. It will give me a laugh if nothing else 😁