Hi so I'm looking for some advice really if anyone has experienced something like this, I do have an appointment with the doctor on Wednesday so I was just looking for some reassurance until then as I've googled this ( bad idea) and didn't really see people with something similar.
So about a year ago ( yes that long and still haven't had it checked) I found a lymph node in my neck which I suffer with very often, I went on a massive kind of mental breakdown and was having panic attacks thinking I was dying, I had it checked and she said it was a reactive lymph node, it's actually still there but shrinks and goes up a bit when I'm ill, anyway when I was going through that I started with really bad health aniexty and started checking my entire body for lumps as I was sure I had something seriously wrong with me, that's when I found this under my arm.
Its in my under arm but at the sort of crease bit which folds when you bend your arm down if that makes sense, i wouldn't really describe it as a lump as such, as when I put my arm down it goes down like a lump of fat and I have checked so many times I when my arm is down or I am lying down there is no lump at all, it's literally just when I am standing up it looks like a soft lump of fat or a soft bulge if that makes sense, it is different than my other armpit. I originally just disregarded it as a fatty lump or something as I couldn't feel a definite lump when lying down or putting my arm down and I could pinch it with my fingers, it's about the size of a 50 p I would say, it could have been there a lot longer but I noticed it a year ago and it hasn't grown since then at all and I have often noticed when I wake up in the morning after rest it's slightly smaller and as the day goes on it goes back up to the usual size.
I feel so stupid looking back and not having it checked, if only for peace of mind as it has completely distroyed my life, I have a mental breakdown every day thinking I'm dying and that something is seriously wrong, I have panic attacks every morning when I wake up and I constantly check it, every time I've tried to pick up the phone to get it checked I would start getting heart palpations and chest pain and I wpild start shaking, but today I finally had enough and rang them, when the phone was ringing I was literally shaking and my heart felt like it was coming out of my chest, the doctor called me back and asked me questions, I don't have any weight loss or night sweats etc, she asked me what it was that was concerning me about the lump as I'm only checking now and I told her that it's more for peace of mind to know what it is, she told me to come in Wednesday and I just don't know what they are going to do, I am only 22 and I have 2 small kids and I cry all the time thinking I'm going to leave them, does anyone have any positive stories, I'm not a doctor but I'm pretty sure it's not a lymph node as I have suffered with lymph node swelling since I was really young and I get it all the time and know what lymph nodes feel like, this is like a soft fatty bulge is the only way I can describe it as x