Health anxiety, and have convinced myself I have bowel cancer

[Ramina]

Hi
I’m making myself so ill. I suffer from health anxiety so everything is the C word. For a few months now I’ve had a change in bowel habits, just going twice a day to my normal once in the morning. I’ve also had lower stomach cramps, I’ve had bloods done and all ok. Doctor isn’t worried but has booked me in for a scan. My dad died of bowel cancer in his 70’s so I’m petrified. I have had no blood in stools, it’s making me feel so sick with worry I haven’t been eating. It consumes me. I can’t keep ringing the doctors all the time, I think they have got fed up with me. Googling day and night, it’s absolutely exchausting 😔

Anxiety itself can have a huge impact on your bowels. That and not eating properly will have a massive effect.
Have you got help for the anxiety? Do you think if you did the other symptoms you have might go away? Have you googled and come to the bowel cancer conclusion? Dr google is the worst for things like this. You can diagnose yourself with all sorts and in the end it’s nothing and you’ve wasted so much time googling and worrying.

My friend has health anxiety very severely. Her counsellor said you’re spending so much time googling and worrying you’re not spending any time living.

Also how old are you?

Hi Hannah1992
Thank you for reaching out. I’m 47, I don’t know if it’s my age that’s making it worse. Yes, I’m on citalopram but a very low dose. I’m so sorry for your friend, it’s deliberating. I’m googling constantly and all though there’s maybe 10 other causes I always convince myself it’s the worse one. Seeing my father and Mother suffer with cancer hasn’t helped me. I definitely need some other help.

It might be a good idea to see if you can get some counselling. The fact that your parents have suffered with cancer will be having a massive impact on you.

I think your stomach issues will be happening due to your high anxiety levels

I think I have to. I can’t carry on like this. If this passes something else will take hold. Thanks again.

Hi OP. Im currently having treatment for breast cancer and the BEST advice anyone gave me from day1 is to stay away from Google. It will ramp your anxiety up no end and as I found out( and was told)all the info is hopelessly out of date. Try to relax and get some gentle excercise, i find this really helps my tummy issues. Good luckx

@Ramina I think some therapy would do you the world of good. In my friends case she had throat cancer for a week, then the sore throat went away and she moved onto a brain tumour. The migraine she had went away then she moved onto breast cancer. She was checked by three different doctors who could feel no lumps, there was nothing at all to concern any of them but she wasn’t convinced. She was constantly googling, checking her breasts, looking at her breast and even asked me to look at her breasts because she could see a size difference etc. Normal things that everyone has but she had played it up in her mind to focus on it and therefore it looked worse to her. She started therapy and then ended up in couples therapy too because her husband was ready for leaving her because he couldn’t cope with it anymore.

She is much better now and although she still has the thoughts they no longer take over her life like they used to. she can shower in a morning without breaking down over something’s she’s seen. She can relax in the bath without looking at herself and checking all the time. She can function day to day without going into full on panic mode. She’s only 28 and it was no way to be living. Hers was triggered when her nan died unexpectedly and she was the one that found her.

Please do find someone to talk to. I’ve seen what it does to a person but I’ve also seen the person come out of the other side too. It can be done and your life will be much much better

Redannie118 I’m so sorry to hear this, thank you so much for your advice . I find when I keep busy it eases. Long walks to clear my head. I really need to keep off google and try abc keep positive. I really hope it all goes well for you. Sending love and positivity x

Hannah1992 you could be describing me! It makes me feel more positive when I hear people can get better and live normally. It looks like therapy is needed. I have to do something. Life is too short and precious. It does affect everyone, I’m married with 4 grown up children. They know when I’m having a bad dip, even though I desperately try and hide it. I don’t want them to take this horrible anxiety on too in their lives. Thank you for taking the time to reach out today, it means a lot.

@Ramina you absolutely can come out of the other side. I’m rooting for you. I know it’s so horrible to live with and then everyone around you doesn’t know what do or say to make you feel better and it puts you in a place where you feel like nobody is listening or nobody cares.

One thing I know from my friend is reassurance from others, whether that be a doctor or friends or family, it feeds the anxiety and makes it worse. She now has a one month rule. Any symptom that presents (as long as it’s not serious) she can safely leave it one month, keep herself busy and use her techniques and if it subsides she doesn’t need to see the doctor

@hannah1992 I can’t thank you enough for this. Feeling a little more positive this evening. The one month rule makes perfect sense. I will be trying it too. You take care and once again thank you!

@Ramina I also have health anxiety and often feel the way you do. I recently went through an episode (mine peaks and troughs) and my bowels we’re terrible. Lots of cramps and multiple times a day. I’m mostly through this episode and bowels much better.
Definitely recommend staying away from google. I now NEVER google my symptoms as it can induce almost instantaneous panic.

There is a really helpful health anxiety book that helped me a few years ago as has practical tips

www.worldofbooks.com/en-gb/books/david-veale/overcoming-health-anxiety/9781845298241
(Hope link works)
I often have to tell myself to stop thinking about dying and live in the moment and think about living. Definitely look into Counselling, stay busy. I find listening to podcasts as I fall asleep stops me lying there and thinking about what big C I have and having the radio in while cooking or cleaning etc is good distraction. Good luck.

@Readysetcake it makes me feel so much better to know I’m not alone. That’s really it isn’t it, learning to live for the moment, before it passes you by. It makes me sad when I think of how many happy moments have done just that. Thank you so much for your advice, I need to distract myself, I know this will help. I’ve just ordered the book, so I’ve started already. Thanks again, you take care.

Hi, I'm glad I'm not alone. I too have health anxiety and constantly worry about the big C. Everytime I have an ache or pain I think the worst. I zone in on the pain which then amplifies to the point where I dont even know if the pain is real or not. I'm constantly googling stuff and looking for reassurance I'm ok. I had being attending a CBT counsellor but that's on hold due to covid. I've had another flare up with breast pain which is taking over my life. I can't eat or sleep. I've been to the doctor who examined me but couldn't feel anything. Shes referred me to the breast clinic. The same thing happened to me 2 years ago and I got the all clear. I'm peri menopausal and was told my breast pain was mastalgia but now it's got sore again and I'm climbing the walls with worry. Health anxiety is a terrible thing but is part of the menopause for me. I definitely would advise a CBT counsellor who puts things in to perspective. Good luck.

I also get health anxiety. Mine is not helped by pretty chronic anaemia due to bad periods. I really think if they sorted that out I would be in a much better frame of mind. Recent test results scared me about bowel cancer and I also have breast pain getting checked out. It all seems to get on top of you sometimes