I have never enjoyed sex

[tiger58585]

NC.

I'm wondering whether anyone can relate, or whether there is something very wrong with me. I've been having sex for 8 years now, and had two sexual partners during this time. I can honestly say I've never enjoyed intercourse. I'm not asexual, I do feel 'horny' for want of a better word, but this is always for toys and clitoral stimulation rather than anything internally.

I am attracted to men so that is not the issue, and I do crave sex sometimes for the intimacy more than anything else. But what's penetration has occurred, I want it to be over. At best it feels bleh (just like being prodded uncomfortably but bearable, at worst it's painful. I can't understand how it can feel good for a woman.

Psychologically I don't have anything against sex at all, so it's not a case of me being mentally disgusted. I just don't like how it feels - sore.

I've been to the GP and been examined and they couldn't find an obvious problem. They said it could be thrush but I've been treated and the issue remained.

I feel there must be something wrong - sex is made out to be amazing in TV etc and I've never 'got' it. Am I alone?

Sadly, I've never enjoyed sex and I'm in my 50's having had several sexual partners, but I've always found the whole process pretty pointless. I guess some of us are just made that way.

Different people have different experiences. Not all are the same.

I never enjoyed sex until I met my wife, and even then it took us a while to get to know what each other likes.

It's worth remembering that a lot of women can't orgasm from penetration alone, and if you haven't had enough foreplay, it is likely to be uncomfortable. I never enjoyed penetration until I realised I needed to orgasm at least once first, otherwise it's not pleasant. O never enjoyed it with men, I found the whole thing slightly creepy tbh.

Also you could consider buying a small toy and experimenting with penetration on your own, to establish whether it's the sensation itself or whether you're just not at the right point in the event to enjoy it.

If a partner really cares and takes time to make love with you properly, then it's likely you will enjoy. IME most men are shit in bed even if they started off being great, because they naturally put their needs first. & then overtime that becomes the overbearing thing, catch 22 being you then can't be asked to get into it