What did they do to me?!?!?

[angie1984]

So i will try to explain this without waffling too much
My DD is 4 months old and after much discussion me and DH decided to start trying for next DC in August (i'm a planner). However after several unsuccessful attempts to have sex nothing was getting close due to it being too painful.
Been to see the GP on monday who after checking me over stated it was very tight up there and that some of the 30 stitches i had had snapped but that i was all healed. She said if I did continue to try to have sex it would be like doing it for the first time but more painful and I would bleed, i might want to take some pain relief before we start and that if i bleed too much to go to a & e . She offered to refer me to a specialist to make a new wound down there which after some consideration I will be taking her up on.
This is my first DC and I knew things would change down there but not to this extent, and its not the lack of sex. I also knew that it would hurt the first time as well but to do that the DH has to make it inside.
My DD does not sleep through the night so sex very very very low on my list of priorities, its that the plan for my family is being affected.

Oh my goodness poor you. Sounds awful.

Are you breast feeding? Along with all those stitches it can reduce estrogen levels which can make sex more painful.

You need to see a specialist for an assessment.

It's up to you but I'd have a long hard think about the idea of conceiving when you DC is just over 6 months old. They say it takes a year for a woman's body to recover from childbirth (not the vagina- the whole body) . why the rush? It's w hole different ball game having 2 in nappies with barely any gap between them. Mine have 26 months between them and that was tough enough.

Thank you @Queen
Yes I am breast feeding and i didn't realise that about it.
We both always wanted a big family and agreed that the first two would be closer together and then any others would have a bigger gap so I can focus on my career without having to schedule training between maternity leave and pregnancies.

I understand about wanting no career gap but you also need to think of your body. Your pelvic floor needs time to recover, as well as the rest of your body. Course it depends if you have help at home, are buying in help or have family close by to help with 2 small children. My advice still stands- you've not yet experienced the sheer tiredness of having one child less than a year old and the demands of that. Mine didn't sleep through the night till each of hem was 7 months. There was no way I'd have wanted to conceive at that stage - and feel rough with sickness- so soon. But it's a personal choice.

I think you need to go back to your Gp and get a gynaecological referral. Or whatever is appropriate. Sounds like they put too many stitches in. The advice to just deal with painful sex is awful! Can you talk to your health visitor or midwife? Some Gps are not really interested in helping until you push the matter unfortunately.
I wanted my children close together and it's no-one business except yours. However, I didn't ovulate until I stopped breastfeeding. So have a 2year gap. They are best friends now.

Google the "husband stitch" - and if you can get confirmation this was done to you then make a formal complaint.

You poor thing, I'm glad you're planning to take up the referral the GP has offered you. Unfortunately it might be a bit of a wait though, then if they do carry out a procedure I would think it would need a few weeks healing . Hopefully over the long term a few extra months won't make too big a difference with the timings.

OMG just read about the husband stitch and i think that might be what happened to me as the hole is definitely smaller than pre birth, however will have to get this confirmed.