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Original poster

I Don't Know HOw She Does It - Allison Pearson

21 replies

Pennies · 29/05/2005 19:45

Just finished this. It was recommended to me by a friend who I can only conclude hates me!

In my opinion it was a nothing more than a self-indulgent non-stop winge. Utterly depressing and frustrating. It just didn't go anywhere, whilst depserately trying to strike a blow for women's lib and faililng. Unlikeable protagonist and poor characterisation throughout.

Anyone else thought this or is it just me?

OP posts:
mrsflowerpot · 29/05/2005 19:46

no, me too, hated it.

Yorkiegirl · 29/05/2005 19:46

Message withdrawn

NomDePlume · 29/05/2005 19:49

agree, didn't hate it per se, it was just a waste of time

jampots · 29/05/2005 19:50

crikey i thought it was great - clearly am very shallow

bossykate · 29/05/2005 19:50

i must read this. i heard parts of it on the radio when it was dramatised and they made me lol - some of the observations were v. acute and poignant - e.g. when she's going on the business trip and denies herself saying a prolonged good bye to the children because it will upset them - i have been there. also the frustration with her husband at times.

having said that, i have read some of AP's columns and "non stop whinge" and "utterly depressing and frustrating" i agree with - being a working mother isn't inevitably rubbish and awful - some of us quite like it and manage to strike a decent work/life balance.

as i said, must read it.

Original poster
Pennies · 29/05/2005 19:55

Oh Jampots - if you liked it it doesn't make you shallow! What was it that appealed? I'd be interested to hear your view.

Bossykate will accept that some observations seemed very resonant but the fact that her point seemed to be that it is only possible to be a working mother if you can either work from home or you work in a pretty low ranking job.

I wonder if Cherie Blair has read it? he he he

OP posts:
bossykate · 29/05/2005 19:57

pennies, as i said, i haven't read the book only listened to bits of the dramatisation.

but the points you make about her view of working mothers comes across in her columns - and no, as i said, i don't agree with those!

Janh · 29/05/2005 19:58

I agree with bk & jampots - as an observation of family life (with or without a working travelling mother) I found it very effective.

Was it trying to strike a blow for women's lib? I didn't think so - I thought it was intended to point out that it is bloody hard work if you want to "have it all".

katierocket · 29/05/2005 20:00

i loved it. some very accurate observations on trying to juggle work with being a mother. Particularly liked the obsessive listmaking in her head. OK it's not going to win the pulitzer but it's not really intended be high brow is it.

Original poster
Pennies · 29/05/2005 20:02

Good point Janh - tho why did she have to have it all to such extremes? I thought she was just greedy and selfish. The cause of her own undoing.

I'm ranting now tho aren't ?!

OP posts:
ambrosia · 29/05/2005 20:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Janh · 29/05/2005 20:04

There, there, dear

Janh · 29/05/2005 20:05

That was to Pennies btw, not ambrosia!

hermykne · 29/05/2005 20:05

shes doing another book, and a mumsnet poster posted the link to the research page for this new book - with a questionnaire for all to fill in re motherhood.

Janh · 29/05/2005 20:06

Ohhh yes, I saw that, hermykne - it was sounding as if she wanted to pick everybody's brains to put into a book with her name on the cover?

hermykne · 29/05/2005 20:08

jan i hought there was an option on the form to allow for your name to be printed
of course she ll prob take liberty with the info she gets
i started filling it in and then one of my charges called me .....

ambrosia · 29/05/2005 20:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WideWebWitch · 29/05/2005 20:10

I've read it, but ages ago when it first came out in hardback. Some bits are very sad and true: working father says 'I've got to leave early to make my son's sports day' and everyone goes 'aaaaah, how devoted,' smiles; working mother does same and is considered lazy, not committed to her job, part timer never mind what other hours she puts in blah blah. I was irritated by the device which listed the contents of her working woman's head at the end of each chapter and I just thought, well, we've all got that going on love. Oh, we probably haven't actually, but it irritated me slightly nonetheless. Having said all that I did read it in one sitting so it really can't have been that bad and it did make me cry so I wasn't sneering as much as I'm remembering I suppose! I didn't like the ending AT ALL either, too pat, but I won't give it away here.

hermykne · 29/05/2005 20:11

itll be like that awful diane keaton movie where she has a baby as a high flying exec of somtething and single mother, jesus i hate that movie

Enid · 29/05/2005 20:12

I enjoyed it, especially the fond stuff about her dd

hermykne · 29/05/2005 20:20

enid i know that is lovely but the whole movie was mad, who is like that?

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