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Original poster

Children's books that don't quite rhyme

79 replies

PolarBlair · 05/01/2023 12:46

Does anyone else find this so annoying?
I have no problem with books that don't rhyme at all.
Then there are geniuses like Julia Donaldson and Dr Seuss where it rhymes and flows so well.

But the ones I find so annoying are the ones where the syllables are off, the rhymes are not quite rhymes (in any accent), the same word has been used twice to make line A & B rhyme.

These are often self published but do the authors not realise? Do they not ask friends?

I often want to take a red pen, correct them, and send them back

OP posts:
ZacharinaQuack · 05/01/2023 14:15

I bloody hate those 10 Little... books. Not only do they not rhyme, they're just really badly written and confusing. Took me ages to understand what was even going on in 10 Little Penguins... Luckily I was made to read it over and over and over again so I had plenty of opportunity to work it out.

Julia Donaldson rhymes for me, but I have a posh southern accent.

Colourinsidethelines · 05/01/2023 14:34

Scarf and giraffe don’t rhyme in my northern accent and it drives me mad in The Smartest Giant in Town. So annoying. Plus it’s too long a book so she could have cut that bit out as the rest rhymes ok.

picnicshicnic · 05/01/2023 14:56

ChristmasCakeAndStilton · 05/01/2023 13:01

See, I don't think Donaldson always gets it right - there is a peculiar couplet in the highway rat, and scarf, laugh, giraffe don't all rhyme.

It's an accent thing as much as anything.

"For I am the rat of the high way, the high way, the high way!"

?

Yes, I just miss those lines out now, I've never really understood how they are meant to sound.

Even when I watched the tv version narrated by David Tennant, I think, I didn't think those lines sounded very good.

Think the rest of Julia Donaldson is great.

OP, yes, agree, I find it very irritating.

ZacharinaQuack · 05/01/2023 15:19

picnicshicnic · 05/01/2023 14:56

"For I am the rat of the high way, the high way, the high way!"

?

Yes, I just miss those lines out now, I've never really understood how they are meant to sound.

Even when I watched the tv version narrated by David Tennant, I think, I didn't think those lines sounded very good.

Think the rest of Julia Donaldson is great.

OP, yes, agree, I find it very irritating.

Show quote history

I read this as having a rhythm a bit like the song Aiken Drum (he played upon a ladle, a ladle a ladle etc.).

BigMadAdrian · 05/01/2023 15:21

picnicshicnic · 05/01/2023 14:56

"For I am the rat of the high way, the high way, the high way!"

?

Yes, I just miss those lines out now, I've never really understood how they are meant to sound.

Even when I watched the tv version narrated by David Tennant, I think, I didn't think those lines sounded very good.

Think the rest of Julia Donaldson is great.

OP, yes, agree, I find it very irritating.

Show quote history

I think she has nicked it from 'The Highwayman' poem - it uses the same rhythm. I think it is supposed to be like a horse galloping.

Talipesmum · 05/01/2023 15:32

Ladybird did a whole updated series of their little fairy story type kids books around 2008-12 ish. They were square and had rubbish cartoony pictures. I bought quite a few in homage to the lovely ladybird books of my childhood before I realised how absolutely dreadful they were. They did the half-assed rhyming thing, flitting randomly from bad rhymes to prose (when the rhymes got a bit tricky) and scattered over some pointless adjectives to make it more fun. I think I expunged them all from the house but I’ll see if I can find any. The enormous turnip was a particular horror.

Luckily they stopped making these ones and improved again, plus the usborne ones were great.

RuthW · 05/01/2023 15:37

ChristmasCakeAndStilton · 05/01/2023 13:01

See, I don't think Donaldson always gets it right - there is a peculiar couplet in the highway rat, and scarf, laugh, giraffe don't all rhyme.

It's an accent thing as much as anything.

Yes they do.

Original poster
PolarBlair · 05/01/2023 15:37

TheBirdintheCave · 05/01/2023 14:06

When reading to my toddler this is something that I’ve found,
Often now I bite my tongue or change the sentence round,
To make it work or smooth the flow, to offer a correction,
To he who chose that noun or verb or wrote with that inflection.

Rhyming schemes are easy if you take the time to try,
But it seems these days that authors are more motivated by,
Quantity over quality, (prose with brief evaluation),
And it will forever be, to me at least, a source of irritation.

Love it!!!

OP posts:
Wtafis · 05/01/2023 15:39

And seven and raven

itsallgonepetetongagain · 05/01/2023 15:43

Not so much about the rhyme but I really struggle with the Ugly Five - how am I supposed to sing it?!

ChristmasCakeAndStilton · 05/01/2023 15:44

@RuthW sorry, but you can't tell me what rhymes in my accent. For me scarf doesn't rhyme with laugh. They might well for you, but it is not universal.

Talipesmum · 05/01/2023 15:49

Got it. This one. Ladybird First Favourite Tales. Utterly heinous text. Here’s some of the Enormous Turnip. It rhymes - in parts. Some bits just don’t. And it nearly all doesn’t scan. They just seem to have attempted to add rhyming words at the end of sentences. Mostly. Apart from if it was tricky, or they wanted to list words.

The Enormous Turnip

Once, a man came out to his garden with his turnip seeds and his hoe.
He dug and he delved and he set his seeds in a row.

He cared for his seeds and watered them well, and the turnip seeds began to swell.

In a very few days came little green leaves.
They poked and they pushed and they pointed. The man with the hoe rolled up his sleeves.

He plucked out the weeds and raked off the rubble.
He didn't know there was going to be trouble.

At last the turnips began to grow. They got bigger and bigger and bigger.
And the man with the hoe said, "So.

We'll have turnips for breakfast and lunch and for tea. And it's turnips for supper, too, thanks to me.

One of the turnips - the best of the lot - began to take over the whole of his plot.

It grew bigger and bigger every day.
It was huge. It was vast. It was ..
ENORMOUS!
The other poor turnips got out of its way.

The man was baffled but he kept on hoeing.
And the ENORMOUS turnip kept on growing.

Etc.

Children's books that don't quite rhyme
TheBirdintheCave · 05/01/2023 16:00

@PolarBlair Thanks 😅I didn't think anyone was going to see it as it was at the bottom of the page.

timetorefresh · 05/01/2023 16:05

I used to love reading the Hairy Mclairy books. Loved the rhymes in those

Original poster
PolarBlair · 05/01/2023 16:59

Talipesmum · 05/01/2023 15:49

Got it. This one. Ladybird First Favourite Tales. Utterly heinous text. Here’s some of the Enormous Turnip. It rhymes - in parts. Some bits just don’t. And it nearly all doesn’t scan. They just seem to have attempted to add rhyming words at the end of sentences. Mostly. Apart from if it was tricky, or they wanted to list words.

The Enormous Turnip

Once, a man came out to his garden with his turnip seeds and his hoe.
He dug and he delved and he set his seeds in a row.

He cared for his seeds and watered them well, and the turnip seeds began to swell.

In a very few days came little green leaves.
They poked and they pushed and they pointed. The man with the hoe rolled up his sleeves.

He plucked out the weeds and raked off the rubble.
He didn't know there was going to be trouble.

At last the turnips began to grow. They got bigger and bigger and bigger.
And the man with the hoe said, "So.

We'll have turnips for breakfast and lunch and for tea. And it's turnips for supper, too, thanks to me.

One of the turnips - the best of the lot - began to take over the whole of his plot.

It grew bigger and bigger every day.
It was huge. It was vast. It was ..
ENORMOUS!
The other poor turnips got out of its way.

The man was baffled but he kept on hoeing.
And the ENORMOUS turnip kept on growing.

Etc.

What a horror 🤯

OP posts:
onyttig · 05/01/2023 17:06

itsallgonepetetongagain · 05/01/2023 15:43

Not so much about the rhyme but I really struggle with the Ugly Five - how am I supposed to sing it?!

To the tune of the gnome mobile.

m.youtube.com/watch?v=We-8utU1kHo

Velda · 05/01/2023 17:51

Oh my goodness that turnip story is dreadful! Sometimes two lines rhyme and sometimes there’s a third line in the middle. How does this nonsense get published?

And yes I agree with The Ugly Five. The rhythm is dreadful, I hate reading it.

onyttig · 05/01/2023 18:37

Velda · 05/01/2023 17:51

Oh my goodness that turnip story is dreadful! Sometimes two lines rhyme and sometimes there’s a third line in the middle. How does this nonsense get published?

And yes I agree with The Ugly Five. The rhythm is dreadful, I hate reading it.

The ugly five does scan to the chorus of the gnome mobile. I sing in it a ridiculous manner.

SleepingStandingUp · 05/01/2023 18:42

picnicshicnic · 05/01/2023 14:56

"For I am the rat of the high way, the high way, the high way!"

?

Yes, I just miss those lines out now, I've never really understood how they are meant to sound.

Even when I watched the tv version narrated by David Tennant, I think, I didn't think those lines sounded very good.

Think the rest of Julia Donaldson is great.

OP, yes, agree, I find it very irritating.

Show quote history

I figured she was going for the "with a ring on the end of his nose, his nose, his nose, with a ring on the end of his nose" effect, but it didn't work

Fairislefandango · 05/01/2023 18:50

@RuthW sorry, but you can't tell me what rhymes in my accent. For me scarf doesn't rhyme with laugh. They might well for you, but it is not universal.

But you didn't say 'they don't rhyme in my accent', you said 'scarf, laugh, giraffe' don't rhyme. That's not universal any more than @RuthW ' s point of view is.

Tbh poor scansion bothers me more than crap rhyming in kids' books.

MarshaBradyo · 05/01/2023 18:50

Yeh or ones that throw a couple of lines into rhyme just because

margegunderson · 05/01/2023 18:52

Debi Gliori - rhymed bees and geese. Ugh.

Original poster
PolarBlair · 05/01/2023 20:05

Ok I have some examples:
"We could speed through the clouds to the heavens above
And tell outer space aliens all about love "
Clunky

"I love you much more than the world's biggest slide
Even much more than a rollercoaster ride
I love you much more than a big theme parade
With singing and dancing as sweet music played
To go to a fun park would be so magic
We could buy a big ice cream and give it a lick"

"The person who loves you so much like no other
Is the person that loves you the most and your mother "

That could easily be changed to :
The person who loves you so much like no other
The person who loves you the most is your mother

These are just some examples and they actually don't seem so bad but the whole book is clunky with the syllables off beat, the lines different lengths so the rhythm is disrupted and his other books are equally bad.

OP posts:
Talipesmum · 05/01/2023 23:15

PolarBlair · 05/01/2023 20:05

Ok I have some examples:
"We could speed through the clouds to the heavens above
And tell outer space aliens all about love "
Clunky

"I love you much more than the world's biggest slide
Even much more than a rollercoaster ride
I love you much more than a big theme parade
With singing and dancing as sweet music played
To go to a fun park would be so magic
We could buy a big ice cream and give it a lick"

"The person who loves you so much like no other
Is the person that loves you the most and your mother "

That could easily be changed to :
The person who loves you so much like no other
The person who loves you the most is your mother

These are just some examples and they actually don't seem so bad but the whole book is clunky with the syllables off beat, the lines different lengths so the rhythm is disrupted and his other books are equally bad.

Ooh nasty. You start reading and think, hey it’s not that bad. Than it is. If you’re going to add a load of extraneous words, at least go to the effort of adding them in places that help it to scan.
And while it’s hard to get rhymes that work in every accent (scarf giraffe as discussed), who is seeing “a lick” and rhyming it with “magic”? Rhymes that make you emphasise it all wrong are all wrong! Upsetting. Bah. Hide it under the bed for a few years.

Zampa · 05/01/2023 23:20

I really struggle with Tiddler by Julia Donaldson but my husband can get it to scan really well.

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