If you read a book with this in it, would you like it? I mean, would you want to read a book like this?? HONESTY ONLY please.

[Hecate]

I'm writing a book about being a mum of kids with autism. But I don't think I'm doing very well and am about to abandon it.

I do not want to waste my time - and I can take it if you tell me that my writing is a bit pants!

I have pasted 2 little bits of my book for you to take a look at, if you feel like it and if you have time (I'm not ordering you or anything.... )

Please be honest, if you think I'm not good enough and I am fooling myself, please say so, I shall not be at all offended.

------

I read somewhere that dolphins are never fully asleep. That only half their brain is sleeping at a time. I know what that's like because I have been doing that for nearly 8 years. The slightest noise and I am awake and ready to go, or more accurately, to prevent/ restrain or rescue. On this occasion however, the footsteps were approaching, not trying to sneak down the stairs or into the bathroom. I opened an eye. Horizontal was standing by the bed. "For Mummy" he said and extended his arms, hands clasped together. "Hurg a murgle" I grunted. I don't regain the power of speech until at least my 4th coffee but roughly translated it's "A present for mummy? How kind, thank you".

I held out my hand. This was a rookie mistake and I should have known better. Rule no 1. Always look first. Anyway, too late and I was now holding a large, warm, slightly moist poo. "Mwrunf" I said ("Thank you".)

I'm dreading Mother's Day.

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This second bit is something I wrote yonks ago for a blog I was doing but abandoned, and have now stuck in my book attempt!

International Tantrum Scale explained.

I.T.S. 1
The smallest eruption on the ITS. Characterised by reddening of face and stiffening of limbs. Accompanied by high pitched wailing and 'Mexican wave' type tremble beginning at subject's toes and ending by vibrating of subject's hair.
Diffusion Strategies
Make 'em laugh. Pull a silly face, do a daft dance, they forget to paddy! (Although you are subsequently banned from Tesco)

I.T.S.2
More violent than the I.T.S.1, but still manageable. Contains all the characteristics of the I.T.S.1, with the helpful addition of holding of breath until subject loses consciousness. Variation on the I.T.S.2 is for subject to retain consciousness, but to retch until lunch is regurgitated over hapless parent.
Diffusion Strategies
Alone time. Secure area. Walk away. (not suitable in all environments)

I.T.S.3
Subject resorts to fisticuffs. Flailing of limbs becomes less random and instead is aimed at hapless parent's head and sensitive bits. Subject may also grab breakable objects nearby and hurl them with unerring accuracy at hapless parent's head. Screaming now beats Boeing 747 for sheer volume, with added bonus of being so highly pitched that every window in the house is shattered. Hapless parents glasses are also, sadly, lost at this time.
Diffusion Strategies
Squash-em-and-see. Sit on subject. Wrap arms and legs round body and tuck head into back of subject, to protect yourself! Hapless parent permitted to amuse self by putting hand repeatedly over subject's mouth to create wa-wa-wa-wa sound. Ensure subject has no access to weapon or hapless parent for 48 hours after indulging in this high-risk form of entertainment.

I.T.S.4
Remarkable combination of I.T.S.1, 2 and 3, plus scream so shrill that only dogs can hear it. Methodical and well-planned smashing of everything breakable and many things marketed as unbreakable. Glorious smearing of subject's faeces over walls, floor, cat and hapless parent. Series of punches, kicks and bites that would floor Tyson. Hapless parent subsequently sports wonderful black eye and split lip, prompting questions about state of hapless parent's marriage. Subject may also experience head rotation and spontaneous expulsion of pea soup.
Diffusion Strategies
Call in SAS. They have tear gas and bazookas.

excellent! you are a very good writer.

you have a very readable , funny style of writing, succing and amusing.. i would buy it !

I think it reads really well. Its interesting, warm and funny. It pulled me in. I agree that the blog bit was a bit different, I found myself skipping through it. Maybe you could incorporate the descriptions of the different tantrum scales into the book, like 'Oh no. This was an ITS3.

ITS 3 ..kicking etc

I wonder if its best not to go on any courses and get 'taught' how to write like everyone else, the one thing that everyone has is their instinctive ability to be themselves, and no-one else can be you, and if you try to write like someone else, 'a proper writer', it might lose fluidity and be unconvincing. And you do sound like a proper writer anyway! I suggest staying as you are.

With punctuation the the slashes///thing bugged me a bit, but thats just me...

Good on you, and good luck with it.

Hecate
You should write this book. Your prose style is lucid and moving. Your sentences scan beautifully. I like the idea of the blog type stuff for the index which would be lighter. You are funny and quick and witty on here and it will all come out.

Hecate, I heart you anyway but I heart you even more now I've seen your writing. Keep going....

transferred post-poo
love it love it love it

It's great. Find yourself an agent asap. I think you're onto a good thing

Hecate, I agree with the others, you are very articulate, and I much prefer to read a book thats written how its spoken, iyswim, than one thats been written in a particular style.

I'm an avid reader and enjoy a wide range of books, and would certainly enjoy reading more of this. I don't always post on threads, but I lurk a lot, and I've noticed that your posts are often very funny especially your observational humour.

I definately think you should go for it, I would buy it. Just from your postings here it seems a good mix of moving/handling emotions/difficult situations and humour.

This was great to read. I think you should just write it all out as you are, I like your style of writing, it is warm and funny, and I think a lot of people would read it.

Another voice agreeing with the others - I think your natural style is very readable, I'd definitely buy your book. I'm also very impressed you can find the time to write it.

I agree that the 1st part (and your later post) were a more natural read.
I DID love the hand-on-mouth wa-wa-wa thing though: will try it myself next time...

Keep going. If you work hard and believe in something, you will succeed.

Excellent , you'll have to advertise on here when its finished so we can all get a copy

Excellent , you'll have to advertise on here when its finished so we can all get a copy

I'm guessing there's literature out there, but is there any narrative 1st person experiences available? Parents in your situ would (I'd imagine) find it a relief to find their experiences reflected in yours, and it always helps to use humour to deal with things!
So, if there is a market for you, your warm and funny style could make for a winner!
The most important thing, though, is do you enjoy doing it? Writing a book is a hard slog, with no guarantees it will be published in the end (or at least not right away) MIND YOU, it looks as though you have a willing audience of mnetters already
Good luck

I liked it all...and would enjoy the second bit in the text too... In the type of life you are writing about I think you probably do sometimes feel a bit bitty and having to hang on to your sanity by looking for the humour. That was what I got from it anyway. I would buy your book!!

excellent - the only books i have read about autism and finished are the ones writing about personal experience in this way - good though he is i find tony atwood difficult to wade through. it's like i can only trust the writer when they tellme about the poo because no one in real life does. i enjoyed your style and found it easy to read.
i wwill be a willing reader when you've finished

I would buy a book like this. can I suggest - keep in mind who you imagine your reader to be. Does he or she have an autistic child? Have a child at all? What response are you trying to elicit - do you want them to laugh, to sympathise, to begin to understand? Maybe if you keep this is mind your style will remain more constant, IYSWIM. Or maybe I'm talking rubbish, but I'm trying to help

I think it's terrific.

Hecate, I love what you've written, its so easy to read & you can really get a sense of you & your family (if a bit poo-focused )!

If you're really not sure, a magazine called Mslexia has a section called Curious Incidents, which is for real-life events etc. You could always try submitting part of it for that?

Sorry if I'm telling you something you already know about btw!

Hecate. Don't give up.

Structure is the name of the game here, and with it purpose.

So take the Charlotte Moore book for instance. Have you read? She mixes personal anecdote of her experience with then more formal information about Autism.

Structure is your friend.

Its personal and anecdotal, but you need to have structure to make it a book, find your arc. Even if it's simple to begin with such as:

birth. aware of odd behaviours. diagnosis. struggle. things that happened. living with autism. being an autist. thoughts. conclusion.

I liked the tantrum stuff. I would put it in between different chapters. It's playful and good.

I really like the content but feel the structure needs work. In particular, some of the sentences in the extracts are quite short and the full-stop pops up too quickly.

I think you could make it almost more narrative in style and then the ideas would flow more readily. As it stands, the content is great but when I read it, I found it jerky.

Honest opinion, which is what you asked for! But good luck with it and yes, how on earth do you find the time? I'm writing a book whilst manhandling a toddler and that's more than enough for me!!

Thank you. Honest opinions were indeed what I asked for, what I wanted and what I am pleased I got. I need to think and plan what I want to do at this point. Do I have the time IS a bloody good point!!

I would read it! Do let us know when you have it published