The Cruel Mother - book of the month for September

[Rachel (mumsnet)]

Hi all, Just to let you know that the next book we plan to discuss in September is "The Cruel Mother" by Sian Busby, "A true story of motherhood, madness and infanticide after the Great War". In this book the author recounts the story of her great-grandmother who was imprisoned in the early 1900s after drowning two of her newly born triplets. After the birth of her second son, Sian Busby decided to investigate the story once and for all and lay to rest the ghosts which have haunted the family for 80 years....intrigued?

We have eight copies to give away to the first members to send their names and contact addresses to [email protected].

Cheers,

Rachel, Justine and Carrie

I know! I'd heard some of those before but always pictured unmarried young women resorting to that - not the older married women who were just desperate not to have to endure another pregnancy and baby.

I found the historical background of how the law had changed. Also I know many of us bemoan how the doctors are involved in pregnancy and delivery now and it's all too hi-tech but it did make me realise that I would prefer it like it is now (with risks of "intervention") than like it was then. Beth's delivery of the triplets was horrific! Was anyone pregnant whilst they read the book?

I liked the bit about lacemakers' sons roaming the streets and causing trouble.

Just goes to show that a)hooliganism/lads causing trouble is not a new thing and b) that poor women in the last century were not in fact always complete angels / martyrs: it reminded me of a thread recently in which someone said that she wanted to spend every minute of every day with her daughter and that her grandmother would have laughed at the idea of "me" time.

Also I really enjoyed the history. Should have studied it really.

I was quite moved by the way she described how hard her husband tried to get her released from Broadmoor (broadmoor ffs!).

I liked the history too SenoraPostrophe - although it confused me at times because she wrote the "characters" as if she was living them - then I remembered that they were real people and this was not fiction. Although she must have "made some bits up" beacuse she didn't know how they were feeling etc.

I guess she was using the example of her family to illustrate the times.

Oh I felt so sorry for Bert! I mean he lost his little girl too, then his wife gets very depressed, gives birth to triplets, one of which is stillborn, then she kills the other two and is locked up. I really wanted to hear his story too. He obviously loved Beth so much - but was he really that understanding - wasn't a bit of him angry?

Loved the book and echo the others who are saying it makes us realise how easy we have it in comparison.

I could really relate to Sian and her grandmother when she talked about the odd feelings you have after having a baby, thoughts about how easy it would be to put an end to things, most women don't but some like Beth did. Makes you realise how scary lack of sleep and raging hormones can be.

Loved the way the book was written for large parts it was definately a history book but then it would catch you up in the story again. Would recommend it to anyone and would read books by the same author again.

I don't know. I guess it was written from a v female pov. He wasn't really properly accounted for imo.

I think she said in the introduction that she was piecing together the facts and stories about the family from the time and parts of it were assumptions.

Yes she did, you are right. I wonder how her family feel about this being turned into a book?

it made me think about the women in my family history a bit more. imaginging them as real people, not just faces in pictures and names on the tree.

i think i might try and look into their circumstances a bit more - particularly as i have just named DD EXACTLY after my great grandmother without realising (first name and middle name).

It made me think about the people/families that lived in our street, our house was built around 1900, but there are a few houses in the street that date back to 1820 something, I was trying to imagine what things must have been like over the years that the book was set in.

Sorry ladies, I have to disappear, I can hear shenanigans in the dd's bedorrm, and they should be asleep! Off to do my stern Paddington Bear stare at them. I will try and add more thoughts tomorrow if that is ok?

Itmade me think more about my family too. I found a family tree for my grandmother's paternal family when I was preg with dd, and started trying to trace the female line. Didn't get very far - the book has inspired me to try again now, but how I'll find the time I don't know.

But SP - what if there is something like this in your family? Sian Busby knew more about her great-grandmother than most of us do because she'd done this terrible thing. Someone said to me once that all families have secrets. I definitely want to find out more about my family and I want to try and imagine whether traits I have are inherited - but I always think of the nice things.

Really thought provoking

I'm going to head off to bed now but will think about the book some more and check this thread again tomorrow.

Nice talking to you all! Night, night!