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Why did I buy Martina Cole?! Just ugh.

16 replies

CtrlAltDelicious · 07/04/2015 13:00

Had a wander through town today and as I'm on holiday from work but a bit skint at the mo I thought I'd treat myself to a couple of charity shop books. Why did I go for the bloody Martina Cole? Every one of her books is identical - outrightly misogynistic, CRINGEY use of what she believes is "street slang," etc.
In this delightful tome we have a seventeen year old girl "with tits like lumps of warm cement" and the female protagonist is worrying that her baby will be a "split arse."

Now I feel gross and £1.50 poorer.

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 07/04/2015 13:01

burn it to keep your hands warm

it is all it is fit for

CtrlAltDelicious · 07/04/2015 13:05

Good plan! Have moved on to Mr Mercedes by Stephen King which I hope is better. It's funny - loads of adult writers obviously use adult content but theres something so distasteful about Martina Cole.

OP posts:
Namechanged101 · 07/04/2015 13:21

Omg those terms! :(
I feel dirty now for enjoying 'The Take' when it was on sky one.
I'm halfway through 'Her' by Harriet Lane really enjoying it would recommend

CtrlAltDelicious · 07/04/2015 13:23

It's The Take I bought! Did it really get made into a series?!

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 07/04/2015 13:32

Martina Cole comes across as a massive woman hater

FuckingLiability · 07/04/2015 13:40

I read a couple of her books a few years ago. The Cockney rhyming slang is absolutely cringeworthy.

Namechanged101 · 07/04/2015 13:41

Yes it was on tv a couple years ago Tom Hardy was in it- don't remember those line being it the tv version although some of it was pretty grim as I remember.

Thurlow · 07/04/2015 13:52

Oh god, I read The Ladykiller (I think) a year or so back, I thought it would be a good new author I could get into and.... eurgh, just unbelievable rubbish. She can't write for toffee. I'd forgive her the silly, cliched plots if she could at least write.

Though The Take was a surprisingly good TV show, mainly for Tom Hardy scaring the pants off everyone.

Namechanged101 · 07/04/2015 13:55

He was terrifying in it wasn't he Thurlow and in Bronson!

Quenelle · 07/04/2015 13:58

I've never considered myself a particularly discerning reader but Martina Cole's use of language is, to put it in the most eloquent terms it deserves, shit.

Financeprincess · 09/04/2015 00:00

I got one for 10p from the church jumble sale: I think it was called 'dangerous lady' or something, about a child prostitute who becomes a gangland boss.

It was utter shite. I left it on a train. How is Martina Cole so popular? How?

confusedandemployed · 13/04/2015 15:25

I got a few of hers as audiobooks. Bizarrely, they were reasonably enjoyable in that format. I just got a proper book of hers out of the library in a rush and I managed one chapter. She really does write appallingly.

PeeNoMore · 19/04/2015 22:51

She's an awful writer. I read a few pages on the Jump (?) and it was sooooo repetitive and badly written. My mum loves her book as a holiday read but even she admits they are all the same plot churned out and rehashed over and over.

Coconutty · 19/04/2015 22:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

stayanotherday · 20/04/2015 21:40

I enjoyed the first one dangerous lady as it was an interesting plot of a London gangland family. I read the family this week and it's like reading the same book again. It's always the same characters in different books. I'm starting to find them tedious.

ChessieFL · 01/05/2015 14:43

Agree. Just full of horrible people doing horrible things to each other. No characters to care about or root for.

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