Fan of Don Tillman? Join webchat with The Rosie Project/Effect author Graeme Simsion on Wednesday 11 March, 9-10pm

[RachelMumsnet]

"Best. Decision. Ever" wrote Mnetter SecretSpy when she followed advice of other readers and picked up Graeme Simsion's The Rosie Project. It was undoubtedly one of the most discussed books of the year.

Graeme Simsion's sequel, The Rosie Effect is now in paperback and we're delighted that author Graeme Simsion will be joining us on this thread to discuss the books and answer your questions on Wednesday 11 March between 9 and 10 pm. Find out more about the books and post your questions in advance to this thread.

I have some longer answers to people who posted their questions in advance before about 3pm today - coming up! Don't expect me to keep up that standard! Where MNers have commented but not asked a question... I won't reply individually, but thank you for reading and taking the trouble to share your views. I don't expect everyone to enjoy the books - in particular humour can be very individual - and there's no point in trying to persuade you to if you don't! As they say, it is what it is.
I'll start with a few answers to questions that have been raised by a few MNers.

Evening Graeme

What's Don's favourite biscuit?

(obviously answer this after addressing the more..um..relevant questions

A few questions already along the lines of "are we laughing at disability?" and "are you making us do it?" so here are some general thoughts.

1. You won't hurt anybody by laughing at a book you're reading to yourself. No harm done yet!

1. I thought long and hard about the comedy / disability question, but the real test was the response from the AS / ASD community. Before publication, I sent the manuscript out to AS

organisations and a bunch of people I know in the AS community (people identifying as having AS or with close family with AS). I got a consistent postive response. They did not see Don as

a caricature but as a realistic portrayal of one person with AS. They also felt it sent a positive message: Don is a decent person and while his approach may be 'quirky', he gets there in his own way. With few exceptions (largely from outside the AS community!), that response has continued.

1. I wasn't so worried about people disagreeing with me - controversy is fine - but I didn't want to hurt people with AS by holding them up for ridicule. The comedy doesn't work like that, and I think the books have generated the opposite response - i.e. more respect. How did you respond to Don?

1. Don would not see himself as disabled. He is generally happy with his life, though there are some things he'd like to do better. Like most of us. I think this is an important point, and where I have struck the occasional negative response, it's from people with kids with severe autism, who are far less high-functioning / independent than Don. These books are not about them. They're not about the whole ASD spectrum. They're about Don and perhaps people like him - not all people who share a label that encompasses a wide range of functioning.

1. Comedy is not about laughing at people or disability - broadly we laugh at the unexpected. Three men walk into a bar ... and the third one does something unexpected. Don is that third man and does a lot of unexpected things - but they all have an underlying logic. He's not stupid, just different, and we wonder if he's the one who has it right. Anyone for the Standardised Meal System? He also does observational comedy: making surprising observations about the social habits and rituals we take for granted. It's the nature of observational comedy that it's US being laughed at!

Well, several of you did ask...

A bit more about comedy. I think that comedy can be effective in getting people to think about important issues (as well as helping us escape from them for a while!). One of the illuminating questions to ask is "why am I laughing?" Great to see MNers doing that.

I'll nip in and magically fix the breaks Graeme...

Rosie in The Rosie Effect... Some readers have found her unsympathetic. Comments from FernieB and CilkieWatkins are along those lines. I'd ask y'all to remember:

1. She's pregnant, doing a PhD and MD concurrently, living with the supervisor she dislikes intensely and who's keeping her husband up drinking. Meanwhile, her husband, in his attempts to be supportive, is being controlling and deceptive. So she's under a bit of stress!

1. I wanted to show Rosie having a tough time and needing support, because DON is the protagonist, and I wanted him to have to step up to the plate. Marriages are seldom 50-50 - they're often 90-10 - and right now it's Don's turn to do the 90%.

1. I wanted to show Don's broader life. If it was a female narrator, I suspect the husband would be off the page quite often while she talked with friends etc. This is what Don's doing when Rosie's absent.

1. Don's telling the story!!

@Valski

Don & Rosie, to my mind, personify modern day relationships.. Despite all the complications they manage to make a life together. The Rosie Project is endearing, quirky and charming. It is my ideal book gift for women age 20 -50 who will all hopefully she the positive message about acceptance it radiates.

Top tip: The audiobook is narrated marvellously by Dan O'Grady and I have played it to death.. a splendid book to listen to and while away the hours!

I have heard about The Rosie Project being made into a film and I have all the usual apprehension about one of my favourite novels being translated to this medium. I have heard that Graeme originally wrote the novel with the idea always being that it would make a perfect film. Is this true? Perhaps Graeme has his own thoughts on how the charm will be portrayed in the film? For example, who would he ideally see as the leads actors and actresses?

If you have read The Rosie Project and are interested in reading The Rosie Effect please take a look at my review.. I promise it will convince you!

That's my most FAQ! Actually, I wrote the screenplay first, then rewrote it as a novel. Sony Pictures have bought my screenplay, and appointed producers and directors, but no casting yet.

Social media have come up with plenty of suggestions: Benedict Cumberbatch, Ewan McGregor, Paul Rudd, Steve Carrell, Ryan Gosling... all actors we've seen play someone like we imagine Don to be. These guys would all do a great job, but I'd love to see someone cast against type... Think Russell Crowe in A Beautiful Mind. As for Rosie... same applies. Jennifer Lawrence and Carrey Mulligan are two names that come up a lot. W hat do MNers think?

@catbob

I was given this for Christmas, hadn't heard of if and had no expectations but once I started reading I couldn't stop! So funny and looking forward to reading The Rosie Effect.

I was wondering why Graeme decided to make Don almost a caricature of someone with Asperger's. Was the character based on someone you knew and did you feel at all uneasy that you might be seen as poking fun at people on the spectrum? I didn't read it this way and think Don would have thought his own description perfectly reasonable and logical but am just curious.

I didn't do any formal research on Asperger's beyond reading a couple of memoirs by people with AS. Don was inspired by people I knew through school, studies (originally physics and later a PhD in a science faculty), and working for 30 years in information technology. None of those people (to my knowledge) had been diagnosed with AS / ASD, but that diagnosis wasn't around when they were young. And these people were functioning well enough in work and study that they may not have felt the need to see a psych. People in the AS community seem to find him realistic - although some outside it complain that he DOESN'T fit their stereotype : aspies don't drink, etc... See earlier comment re poking fun.

Graeme, can we ask you the standard Mumsnet questions that we like to ask all our authors...

What childhood book most inspired you?

What would be the first piece of advice you would give to anyone attempting to write fiction?

What is the best book you’ve given someone recently?

And the best you’ve received?

@RosieCassMuggins

Are you as an author doing anything to campaign for autism in adults to be celebrated?

How must society change so that people like Don Tillman can acknowledge that he has autism, and be out and proud about it, instead of in denial, with his "friends" laughing at him behind his back?

I've now been invited to (and spoken at) many ASD / AS events around the world but don't consider myself informed enough to be a spokesperson on some of the clinical and "political" issues. I tend to share reactions to the books and my experiences working and studying with people with AS - along with thoughts about improving their employment prospects.
My biggest contribution is the books: I believe they're helping to make people like Don more understood / less 'weird' / more a part of the normal range of humanity. More people will take their view of AS from fiction (including The Big Bang Theory) than non-fiction.

In the books, I don't think Don's friends - or indeed the other characters - laugh behind his back. People like the Dean in NYC value him for what he is, and the Dean in Melbourne is legitimately annoyed by him for making her job harder! Of course we can't tell, as the books are in first person, so we only see what Don sees...

The question of 'out and proud' is a tough one and my views are still forming. Don chooses not to identify as having AS, although he knows he would probably be diagnosed as such. He acknowledges - in TRP - that the 'aspie kids' may benefit from the label to avoid other inappropriate diagnoses and treatments. But he also says that he's been diagnosed with other disorders and doesn't think another diagnosis will benefit him. He comments that people are inclined to over-recognise patterns. We should remember that the diagnostic situation has changed hugely over 20 years from "not recognised" to "Asperger's" to "ASD" with diagnostic criteria changing. Don (and I) have no reason to believe we've reached a final Truth. And while it's convenient to have a common label, it can work against treating people as individuals. Once your kid is diagonosed with AS, they'll never have a tantrum again - it'll be a meltdown.

That's only part of it... and I'm not a clinician (though I have a PhD in classification theory, which I think is relevant!). I agree with your implication that society needs to become less judgmental - and the word DISORDER doesn't help that. And successful people have to decide if they have a responsiblity to be role models / exemplars.

Loved both books and thank you for another grown-up Adrian Mole ...

Thanks for your response Graeme - I didn't find Rosie unsympathetic by the way (in fact if anything would have liked to have seen more of her) but do appreciate that Don is the narrator!

@catbob

I was given this for Christmas, hadn't heard of if and had no expectations but once I started reading I couldn't stop! So funny and looking forward to reading The Rosie Effect.

I was wondering why Graeme decided to make Don almost a caricature of someone with Asperger's. Was the character based on someone you knew and did you feel at all uneasy that you might be seen as poking fun at people on the spectrum? I didn't read it this way and think Don would have thought his own description perfectly reasonable and logical but am just curious.

I didn't do any formal research on Asperger's beyond reading a couple of memoirs by people with AS. Don was inspired by people I knew through school, studies (originally physics and later a PhD in a science faculty), and working for 30 years in information technology. None of those people (to my knowledge) had been diagnosed with AS / ASD, but that diagnosis wasn't around when they were young. And these people were functioning well enough in work and study that they may not have felt the need to see a psych. People in the AS community seem to find him realistic - although some outside it complain that he DOESN'T fit their stereotype : aspies don't drink, etc... See earlier comment re poking fun.

Sorry Catbob - posted that response twice!

Thanks. I did feel that Gene and his wife were laughing at Don behind his back, and that if Don could be out and proud, saying "I have AS, and this is how I am" they would not be able to mock him.

@berni140

Adored The Rosie Project-my brother, and possibly the rest of us-they say they're trying to see if there's a genetic link but personally I'm pretty sure there's something-has AS and I related to so much of Don's actions. I was wondering, did you get protective of Don in relation to reviews?As in did you take exception to any reviews concerning Don's AS in how they saw him as a person?Hope this question makes sense!Again, great book, laughed so much and enjoyed it so much!By the way as an aside, his logic was bang on, gave me a new perspective on so many things!

Thanks! My rule as an author is not to comment on reviews. Everyone's entitled to their opinion as to my skills as a writer. But one review did get up my nose because it implied that someone with AS would not want to put effort into finding a partner. As a friend of mine, who has some similarities to Don, said: just because we're not good at it doesn't mean that we don't want it as much as anyone else. He, incidentally, is married and a truly heroic DH to a woman battling serious illness, including dementia.

@littlewifey

Loved both books- thanks MN! Do you think there will be anymore in the series?

I'm thinking about a third - in 5-7 years time. Time will fly... In the meantime, I'm writing a book about a love affair rekindled after 22 years and a love story set on the Camino de Santiago de Compestela.

@BearAusten

Thank you for my copy of The Rosie Project. I thought it was hilariously funny and very original. I will definitely read the sequel.

Why do you think the socially inept Don Tillman is such an appealing character to so many readers?

Did you set out to write a novel about someone with autistic tendencies, a love story or something entirely different?

I think we like Don because he's different - and most of us have met people like him. So we're curious. Conversely, we like him because he's 'the same' - we've all made the same mistakes Don has, so we empathise, and perhaps take a little pleasure in seeing someone do even worse! And we are naturally on side with someone seeking a goal we can all identify with, but struggling to get there.
I set out to write a story with Don (ie someone with AS) as a hero. It was originally even more heroic (in the true sense of the word) but it changed in the making. And changed from drama to comedy.

@Hygellig

I enjoyed The Rosie Project and am looking forward to reading the sequel. I've even suggested introducing a Standardised Meal Plan (albeit on a monthly basis) into our house as I think it could save a lot of time and effort!

My question for the webchat - do you think Asperger's is becoming a popular subject for novels? For example, as well as the Rosie books there's the The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night Time and The Boy Who Fell to Earth - is a novel with a main character who has AS likely to pique readers' curiosity and could this have beneficial effects in terms of awareness-raising?

We need more! AS is prevalent in the community, and the more familiarity we have with it - through fictional and real people, good, bad, smart, silly, etc etc - the more we'll accept them, and start to see past the the things they have in common to the things that make them individuals. Good luck with the Standardised Meal System!

@PercyGherkin

Reading my free copy of The Rosie Project but only getting it a few days beforehand means it's a race against time to finish by tonight. I am enjoying it, and have laughed out loud in places (trying the Reverse Cowboy with a skeleton and the Dean coming in to say "when you've finished mending that skeleton")

I did wonder how realistic it is that Don doesn't apparently recognise his own traits - the part at the beginning where he gives the lecture and I think Claudia (can't remember exactly) says something like "Does that sound like anyone?".

I think Don chooses not to 'go there' - see my answer to RosieCassMuggins.

@queenoftheschoolrun

Just started my copy of The Rosie Project and enjoying it so far. Don's character really reminds me of my Mum's partner. Endearing and infuriating at the same time.

My question is - Did you base Don's character on someone you know? Or is he just a stereotype?

I drew on people I'd met in university and working in information technology - colleagues and friends. These were, I should add, people I generally liked and respected, and I hope that comes through in my portrayal of Don.

@MusicAndBooks

Thanks for my copy of the Rosie Project which I got yesterday! So far I really like the humour threaded throughout the narrative-it helps you start to understand the issues people face. My question is does this come from your own experience of someone close or did you need to research the thoughts and feelings involved? Are you hoping to give a voice to someone's viewpoint which normally remains hidden? Looking forward to finishing the book and will definitely read the sequel!

I think as an novelist you're always trying to give voice not to a real individual, but to a character who represents many people - and Don was inspired by many people I knew who felt misunderstood - with good reason.

@TalesOfStepford

I was thrilled to receive my copy of The Rosie Project, I have been wanting to read it, so thankyou! I am racing through it and laughing out loud in public places. Don is truly a comic hero and I warmed to him easily, which is rather clever considering his own lack of empathy for others. He gives a brilliant speech to a group of young people with Asperger's and their parents yet never acknowledges that he himself also has it. It's a quirky idea, applying logic and science to find a 'solution to the wife problem' but somehow I could relate to Don's plight. Not sure what that says about me, but I wonder if Graeme intended for us as readers to find a 'way in' to the workings of Don's mind by making him such an empathetic character?

I want everyone to be able to relate to Don - for a few hours to have a sense of what it's like to be him. As a novelist, you want to be able to write characters who readers can empathise with. As humans, we all have much in common with him - and for many of us it's not a huge step to understand him at least to some extent - and thus to gain a better understanding of some of the people around us who we might otherwise regard as impenetrable / weird. And feedback from the AS community is that he's a fair representative.

Evening Graeme. Like others, I fell a bit in love with Don when I first read The Rosie Project last year. I'm about to start The Rosie Effect and can't wait. I love the fact Don's into his food and cooking. Are you a bit of a foodie? What is your signature dish. Have you been enjoying your food whilst you've been in the UK?

@Kapoww

I'm reading the sequel at the moment and loving it. I have recommended the first book to so many people! I don't feel bad for finding it funny as I think Don is portrayed in a positive light. If anything, he makes more sense than anyone! I'd like to know if you would consider a book from Rosie's perspective?

Thank you! I've been asked about a book from Rosie's perspective, but don't have any plans to do so. The challenge for me is to write from Don's in such a way that we can work out where Rosie's coming from - even if Don can't!