The Indigo child

[Bekki]

Has anyone read this?
I have just started reading this and although I'm sceptical about alot of things, this seems to describes ds1 perfectly. He is, according this book an interdimensional indigo child.
Where is the book leading me to though? Is it pandering to worried parents of children with possible learning/behavioural difficulties? Or does this offer real and practical solutions and insights into our children?

Sorry, thats the 'The Indigo Children' by Lee Carroll and Jan Tober.

hi bekki, i too have read the indigo children. with reference to your comment about pandering to worried parents of children with possible behavioual difficulties - i personally believe we live in a very intolerant society when it comes to having children. after having my first child i felt very isolated living in a small village where most of the people were retired military - children were definately seen and not heard, it made me very unhappy and looking back it was probably my main reason for moving out to a more 'alternative' child friendly town. the book did give me comfort - it has taken me 3 years to realise there is no such thing as a perfect parent nor is there a perfect child. another book that gave me confidence was called 'raising your spirited child' (amazon.co.uk) it made me look at everything differently - when normally i would feel judged by someone or they were quick to 'label' him or his behaviour i would replace it with a positive. for example if someone were to say 'oh he looks like a handful' i would reply that he has lots of energy and zest for life! otherwise the child starts to become the label and you begin to feel like you can't control your child, which i now think is ridiculous - children should be allowed lots of space and as my ds1's nursery teacher reassured me the other day: 'the most hardest movement for a child to master under the age of 7 is the art of sitting still!'. don't know how old your ds1 is but my ds1 (now 4) hated going to the city during his first 2 years. i think he was very sensitive to the amount of people, noise, smells, lights etc. so i began to shop mainly online. he's fine now and looks forward to it . looking back he sort of held up a mirror to me and made me realise what's important and has made me stronger - i am sure he has taught me more than i have taught him about the world! anyway hope some of this ramble makes sense.

Hi shrub, sorry only just seen this.
I haven't read too far yet.
I'm a bit wary of the colour/aura part of this book. But underneath all of the nonsence I think it has some powerful insights.
My ds1 is 4 in May and is having some problems fitting into everyones expectations of a 4 year olds behaviour.
I'm worried that I have labelled him and I have taken steps to counteract this problem. But now we are facing the prospect of ds1 having a behavioural difficulty I'm worried that labelling will become an ineveitable part of his life. I hope this book will help me through some of these issues.
I know what you mean about sitting still, nightmare. According to this book what type of Indig child do you have?

hi bekki, i can't remember what type my ds1 is as i leant my book to someone last year and never got it back. i just remember it made me think differently about what it is to be a child and gave me more confidence in parenting. i don't know your ds1's behaviours but to give an example for the last 2 years my ds1 had this habit of throwing toys in the air, and would orchestrate the falling down of anything i had tried to build with him, wrongly believing he wasn't playing with his toys appropriately and finding it difficult to engage with him. i was lucky that i found a very experienced nursery teacher who took the time to explain to me about piaget - vertical schemes and schemas (look under google if interested). she explained that all children learn differently and this was his way of making sense of the world and how things fall. he would eventually stop once he felt he understood the nature of gravity! she also advised me to play at his level and do lots of role play and this has definately helped his speech and confidence. she also taught me to sit down and slowly give a very simple explanation of what/where we were going to do that day so to avoid any strong reaction to surroundings .being a very highly strung and sensitive boy (like his mum!) i also took him to a cranial osteopath which seemed to have a dramatic effect on him relaxing more ( i had previously never tried anything alternative). to turn label issue around 'raising your spirited child' was very useful with dealing with certain types of people who were so quick to make judgements. to go back to your original question, i think the book lets you look at things from the other side, it opened my mind to the fact that maybe the chlild is strongly reacting against the modern ills of the world and that 'to find another way' is the message? when i found out that einstein didn't utter his first word until 3 i felt justified in walking away from all the neurosis of charts and statistics that every child is suppose to fit into. i am at present just trying to build on his strengths and interests. he has this extremely loud booming voice (which is very strange as he is tiny for his age!) but we are now going to a musikgarten group which he loves and instead of being told to be quietr he can sing to his hearts content! hope some of this helps

Yes it helps thanks!
I think society expects far too much from our children. I don't find it odd that my 3 year old likes running around and doesn't like counting, sitting and singing nursery rhymes. But in an educational setting he has to be able to do and enjoy these things.
I'm not sure where this book is heading I can't see how it can offer any realistic help for me; As most of the advice so far is geared towards the calmer type of Indigo child. (Ds1 is loud, clumsy, sensitive and emotional).
All in all - this book so far has helped me to view ds1's behaviour in a more positive light. It has made me look at my responses and attitudes rather than his actions and reactions.
I hope that it can help us to understand his point of view a little more and hopefully there will be more practical advice later in the book.
But on second thought this book fits in perfectly with 'How to talk so kids will listen and listen so kids will talk', so I could use the practical elemants of that book in connection with the thought processes in this one. Oh it would be wonderful if a book could just do the parenting for you. Reading and doing are two very different things. I lost my temper more times than I'd like to remember today.
I will definatley have a look for the other book that you mentioned, once I've waded through this one.
Thanks shrubs!

hi bekki, read your post. our ds's sound similar in character lots of energy but exhausting? read an article today which mentioned the author 'stephen biddulph', i think he wrote the book 'bringing up boys'. in the article he advocates that boys should start school a year later - which i think would help my ds1 (not sure for me though). he mentioned how boys are so different to girls developmentally and how we expect them to be the same, in fact he went as far as to say how society (british?) expects far too much of childrens behaviour - 'we're not educating OAP's, these are people at the very beginning and prime of their lives!' made me laugh. but also made me sad at how right he was. made me think of the recent news coverage of fathers' rights to see their children and how they have sucessfully closed roads etc. i think we should do the same. can you imagine closing a busy highstreet for the day so our kids can run around, bring their bikes, make noise! i can hear the outcry now, the tutting pensioners - the same people who 60 years ago had the same open spaces to race around were given brandy to make them sleep and the back of their parents hand if they dared to step out of line!

Hello..
I'm very interested in this book too - dd1 has a lot of the Indigo traits- but like you am torn between taking it on board, or thinking- what a pile of West Coast American nonsense.
Wish there were a few more sensible UK based experts who would share their opinions. A lot of it is really just based on anecdotal evidence and conjecture.
nevertheless you may be interested to know that one of the American contributors, will be doing a seminar on this topic in London- May 4th.