Anyone there who can talk to me about bulimia?

[HereComesSpring]

This is the first time i have ever used that word about myself. After 20 years of very secretive B&P, i have finally admitted to myself that i have a problem with this. I can't talk to anyone in the RW about this, but hoped to find refuge/understanding in MN.

Maybe i should have posted in the Mental Health strand, but i am also trying to lose weight (the overeating part has taken its toll) and i hoped to find others who were in this position and wanted to shed weight without purging.

Anyone there?

I was bulimic all through high school and uni. I lost no weight but have a big hole in my tongue and have lost enamel on my teeth due to it.

I still have the urge now when I feel I have eaten too much.

Get help. See a GP or counsellor because in the long run it does not work and you end up with damage to your body.

Thanks for answering. Can i ask what kind of help you got if any? Did you manage to cut it out completely? At times i have been convinced i had go the better of it, but it has always returned.

No help at all. Came to the conclusion that what I was doing was stupid and unhealthy. Oh you always still have the urge but I do try to resist and I find a way to distract myself untilt he urge has passed. I think now of the amount of money I have spent on my teeth because of the vomiting and that stops me from starting up again.

Sorry, had to go deal with wakeful kids.

Your willpower is something to be really proud of.

Hi there.

This is only my third posting on MN so bear with me as I learn to find my way around this place. (Just so you know, i'm male and I work with people who had bulimia and now no longer do).

Eating disorders in general stem from the need to have control and bulimia is surprisingly common in women (and actually in a fair number of men too). There can be many complex issues that lie at their root, from self confidence, to self control, to a coping mechanism for dealing with sexual abuse, depression and traumatic past experience.

The thing is and this is somethimes the hardest part to accept... though it may make you feel wretched in ways that only you know and I would not dream of guessing at, it is the best coping mechanism that you have got in your life right now. Does it mean that now you have started telling people about it you are feeling ready to talk about it - or is this post you feeling worse than you normally feel?

It's no shame to have the need to B&P. On top of how you feel, try not to saddle yourself with the label of an 'eating disorder' but if you can, try and summon the courage to get the help you so clearly need and want.

I wish you well. Your way of coping doesn't have to be the ONLY way. When you are ready, go look for help and you will find that one day in the not too distant future, you will be free from both the bulimia, the root causes of it and all the negative aspects that you have lived with for the last 20 years.

I wish you well. There is so much more to life than bulimia, YOU CAN be free from it once and for all, you really can.

Rather than seeking refuge and understanding you should see a doctor for practical help. Eating disorders are extremely destructive both physically and mentally. Forced vomiting is very dangerous and can kill. There are therapies you can undertake to help you switch your thinking around to something more normal. And, given that you're overweight, you should ask to be referred to dietician support at the same time.

I would very much caution you against any type of 'dieting' in the meantime. Without close supervision and expert advice any form of food restriction will simply make the problem a lot worse.

See your doctor.

Just to second what others have said and please see your doctor for help. I know it is the hardest thing to go and admit to it out loud but it is the first step on the road to recovery. Best of luck, I know how hard it is and hope you can take this first step.