Fat, depressed and cant stop eating.. Please help!!!

[Joni783]

Hey everybody, im 26 yrs old, 5'6 and 11 and a half stone, my weight is really depressing me.
Growing up I was very skinny, I could eat watever I wanted and wouldnt gain a pound, after my ds was born I lost all my baby weight naturally and was back to my skinny frame, than my second pregnancy I sadly mc and thats wen it all started, drinking and comfort eating to hide the pain and the weight started piling on, two yrs later I was pregnant again although it was a very happy time for me it was also tainted with sadness, im originally from england but lived in new york most of my life and my dd father was very mentally and physically abusive to me so wen I were 3 months pregnant I decided the best thing to do would be to move back to england to get away from him. My dd was born but I still felt lonely and depressed and fell back into comfort eating again im so upset with my weight and my confidence is at an all time low, I think if I lose the weight il be sooo much happier... Please help!!!

Oh honey, it's completely understandable that you've put weight on. You've been so brave to move across the world with your DC and baby on the way, you should be proud of yourself.

So,as far as the weight goes,I think it's a two way thing.You wont go out because you lack confidence and because you wont go out you eat more.Have been there and am on my way out.When DC3 born last year I weighed nearly 12stone,and am also 5'6".I am now down to 10 and a half and feel better both physically and mentally.It can be done.

Ok, first get out and about every day. Doesnt matter where,if you can find things to do with your DC thats great but if not then walking to the shop will make you feel better.I guess you are worried people will be judging you, but believe me they will also be worrying about how they look.Whereabouts are you, may be other mnetters in your area who could introduce you to groups?

You do sound lonely - can summon the reserves to go out at least once a day for a short walk or trip to a baby group?

Have you heard of Home-Start - they can offer support where they'll match you with a volunteer which will help reduce the isolation - some of them have groups which you can go to and you might meet some other parents.

How old is your youngest?

Hi I just wanted to say that I think you have done a really good thing by posting and reaching out to others. It sounds as if you have had a really hard time and that the eating & drinking has been a way of managing some of the feelings that you have a result of the painful experiences you have had. You took control by moving to England and maybe you have been feeling out of control with the rest of your life?? I think the suggestions made by the other two posters are really good to meet up with others if you feel that you can.

For me talking to someone about the experiences that had happened in the past that were still having a big impact on me in the present helped over time. I chose to talk to a psychotherapist that I trusted and I can say it really changed my life. I think having children can also raise all sorts of feelings from the past and eating can be one of the first things that goes awry.

I have a similar background to you and have also struggled with my weight since having children. I was thin before this. I would like to loose a stone and would be happy to do this with you if you are up for it. I am trying to eat healthily and stop snacking in the evening.