How do I stick to a diet when I barely have time to think

[koalabearboombox]

36, BMI of 34. Mum to two, a 4.5yo and a 9 month old. I am 18lbs heavier than when I conceived the 9 month old. And 37lbs heavier than when I conceived the 4.5yo. I feel utterly depressed about my size. People treat me differently, I get constant covert comments from MIL, I feel exhausted hauling myself about after the kids, and I cannot bear to look at myself in a mirror or buy myself clothes.

The only thing that's ever worked for me in the past is weight watchers so I've joined that again. However I barely have a moment to think. Let alone plan meals or track. Both kids are up and down all night. The baby doesn't always reliably nap. Older kid has constant demands and both need constant attention.

I'm not here for a pity party but need some solid tips and tricks from people who have done it: HOW, dear mumsnetters, can I make this work? I simply cannot continue at this size.

It is so hard! What is your day like? Is 4.5 year old at school? Are you home with the baby? If you can put the baby in a pram or sling then walking is all I would hope to do at this point for exercise. Try for 30 minutes everyday. Or get a basic Fitbit to count your steps and set your self a daily goal that you can keep increasing until you are managing 10,000 a day. I do Slimming World but if WW works for you then stick to that. Just have a couple of breakfast, lunch and dinner go to's and stick to those for now. Keep it simple so you are not trying to track new meals every day. As you get more headspace add in new things. Eggs are a winner for me. And apples on hand for snacking. I have the same meals day in and day out just so I don't have to think about it all the time! I've also adapted the family evening meal to be slimming world friendly so I don't have to make separate meals. Take it small steps at a time and just try and build small new habits.

Also, try not to think of the bigger picture. Just concentrate on day to day and what you can achieve towards your goal that day. It can be overwhelming thinking about the total weight you want to lose and how you might get there. And fxxk the MIL.

Are you in a posituon to afford WLI? I have lost 7 stone with MJ this past year!

Do you work?

What are you eating now? Please list it and we'll suggest changes to help

Sorry it appears I have no time to think or update MN threads...

Thanks @Jessica167353 I like the idea of a simple weekly menu. The idea of having the same thing week in week out is fine by me.

@Flowers999 I'm not in a position to afford WLI. Possibly towards the end of the year once I've been back at work a bit.

@canuckup So bit of a typical day...

• Coffee and toast with marmite or scrambled eggs
• another coffee or two, maybe a slice of cake or something if in a cafe
• lunch - could be a jacket potato and tuna at home, or if on the go id probably grap a wrap and crisps from supermarket. Very occasionally it will be McDonald's drive through if baby falls asleep and I'm starving
• 4/5pm - kids leftovers. Snacking while cooking for kids. Maybe a bit of chocolate or some crisps from the cupboard. Usually ravenous and exhausted by this point in the day
• 7.30/8pm - dinner. Normally cooked by DH so plant based, full of veg but carb heavy and prob a reasonably large portion

I think I really need to figure out what I can take with me to have on "the go" as it's normally when I'm out and about that I have the high calorie foods.

Just to add that the last couple of days I haven't had a car (it's in the garage) and I've had to walk everywhere. I'm going to try and keep this up. Clocked up 5k yesterday!

Eat the same thing for breakfast and lunch is what I do.

You have a lot going on so just on to tell you that anything you do is a plus and you need energy so remember that x

It’s so hard when they’re little, especially if you’re not sleeping well so cut yourself some slack.

I would focus on little changes. So find 2 or 3 really easy high protein and lower carb breakfast eg Greek yoghurt, berries and mix seeds. Just rotate them. Make sure you get enough protein so you’re not hungry at the cafe so it’s easier to say no to cake most of the time. Again at the supermarket grab higher carb option of go out prepare, precooked chicken and some apples. As you’re hungry at 5 just eat with the kids as 8 isn’t an ideal time to eat especially if you’re trying to lose weight. Just make one change every few weeks.

I would start doing dinner for the family to eat at the same time as the kids and then husband to heat his up later. Then if you need a snack later you can have something that has been planned rather than picking at snacks and kids leftovers. It will be beneficial for the children to eat with you and will help them establish good habits growing up.

Your current diet isn't terrible. Just make a small change each week, don't go on a strict and unsustainable diet that you will end up giving up.

Maybe start by cutting out the unhealthy late afternoon snack/picking at kids food and have something filling but healthy - you're obviously low on fuel at that point and you need energy for your young kids. Some thick greek yoghurt (not low fat) with some fruit etc, or some peanut butter with some apple. You need the fat and protein to make it fill you up.

You need to look after your wellbeing - stress etc will prevent you losing weight - and you can't pour from an empty cup. You need to nourish yourself with good, nutritious foods, not empty calories from crisps etc

Then next week you can work on something else and so on and so on.

Walking is a great idea, especially if pushing the buggy. Try and walk at a speed where you are slightly breathless - get your heart pumping then you know you're doing some cardio work.

Good luck OP, it's simple, but NOT easy, especially when you've a lot going on in your life.

Id try having protein for breakfast (Greek yogurt and fruit or scrabled eggs for example. Have it as late as you can manage and then try not eating until lunch.

Then each evening, pit aside half of the dinner portion, and eat that for lunch the following day. Have some salad with it to bulk it out if needed.

Thanks everyone. Really useful suggestions, especially the point about just eating with the kids. Need to get myself together to make this happen.

I kind of agree that I do need energy and need to cut myself some slack. I just cannot bear going back to work and seeing people who will be shocked at how much bigger I am.

Onwards!

How are you getting on @koalabearboombox ? I am in a similar predicament, except my last baby was 4 years ago! I just have zero time or energy.
Do you use AI at all? I have used chat GPT to help me meal plan. You can be quite specific about prompts too - so I can ask it to plan all my lunches for the week and for example:
must be high in protein, easy to eat on the go, no more than 400 calories, take less than 15 mins to prepare, avoid spicy food (or any food you don't like) and ingredients must be available in Aldi. It can also do your shopping list for said meal plan. I've done it before where I've just asked it to plan healthy meals and it's come up with a load of food I'd never eat, but when I've been quite specific and told it what foods I like and dislike, it's been pretty spot on!

I've thought about doing those meals boxes with green chef or mindful chef to make it super easy, or even just buying calorie controlled ready meals so I can literally know exactly what calories I have going in. But it's just all so expensive. But it would just make it so much easier!

Try following hungryhealthyhappy on Facebook (presumably Instagram too ) she sends weekly meals plans in her newsletter and is doing a healthy, simple (mostly) calorie deficit diet

I really identify with this from my past. I didn’t try to lose weight until a few months after my last child was at school. It took me a few more months to make the connection that this was the reason, ie. that I finally had the head space.

You need to take the thinking out of it by creating a meal plan if xx number of meals and xx number of snacks that you just constantly cook in rotation.

I had gestational diabetes twice and had no choice but to stick to a very strict diet when pregnant and I managed it by just knowing what I could eat and only eating those things. I agree with you the thinking is the hard bit so sit down and do it on one day and then just keep doing the same stuff over and over (try to come up with two weeks’ worth of ideas)

I also made sure my food never took longer than 15 mins to make otherwise i knew I wouldn’t bother and opt for something easier instead

I have been having weight loss guidance via my GP and have been following these fairly simple guidelines and have lost quite a bit:

• no more UPFs. The less processing the better.
• wholemeal sourdough bread instead of normal bread. It's much more filling so you need less.
• way more protien than I used to have. Per day, you need about a gram of protien per kg if current body weight. Meat is about 25-30% protien, "high protien" veggie sources are typically 10%-15%
• snacks (if sensibly chosen eg carrot sticks & a small bit of houmous) are good not bad. With a snack mid afternoon you get to the dinner table feeling not too ravenous and are ok with a modest size meal.
• limit the windiw in which you ear by making breakfast a bit later and supper a bit earlier - but don't go too far, you have gome too far if you get to breakfast time feeling starving

No diet plan, no recipes, no calorie counting. I think the reason it works is because without the UPFs the constant cravings for more UPFs go away, and when food is packing a sufficiently nutritional punch it is way easier not to overeat.