Suddenly feeling very embarrassed and ashamed

[hidingunderdesk]

I honestly just want to hide away - hence my NC

I have known that the weight has been creeping on over the last year but I’ve been in absolute denial about it. Until today.

I stupidly thought that it hasn’t been that noticeable, that I’m tall and can get away with it etc, but one too many glances at my reflection in the mirror and I have realised that I’ve ballooned.

I’m just so embarrassed, and I keep thinking of what people must be saying or thinking about my appearance. Before anyone says no one else is bothered or would be making comments, I do know human nature and I’m sure it’s been noticed.

I think I’m just looking to vent. I feel like I’ve let myself down so much.

Don't be daft. You haven't let anyone down! The fact you're looking now and deciding it's beyond your comfort zone is great.

I won't repeat diet tips or anything like that. For me it was portion sizes, everyday treats and not doing much stretching, exercise or weights. Did a little bit about each of those and it helped. But probably less so than if I was still in my 20s!

Don’t waste your time being upset or embarrassed- that kind of thinking leads straight to the biscuit tin!!

Make a plan to do something about it and start today! Plan a nice healthy meal or some exercise whatever it takes to get started.

People do notice our size, but they don’t really care about it.

Take some nice positive steps to better health today. Sending big unMumsnetty hugs.

I can honestly say I have never made any negative assumptions about anyone based on their size or shape. Who they are and what they do are what I base my opinions of people on.

Negative self talk never helps, and certainly never helps with trying to get healthier/fitter and drop some weight. You haven't let yourself down, and even if you have, you can make changes from today. You don't have to be perfect and stick 100% to any new changes, but just keep adding in small positive changes and you will start to make progress.

The only time I think something about someone's appearance is when I think "wish I looked like that"😅.. Most of us are not VS models OP and we all have our critical voice directed at ourselves. But why at others? I am tall, slim but I have very large feet, visible veins, cellulite, very small hanging breast, scars from cancer operation on my belly. I really don't think anyone judges me, on the contrary I think it reassures people to see imperfect bodies.

Thank you all. But I don’t mean comments from
strangers. Like you, it doesn’t really cross my mind to consider the size or shape of people I see in the street or passing acquaintances. It’s more what my friends and family must be thinking. 2 years ago I had got down to a really nice weight. I felt great. I’m now nearly 3 stones heavier. They must have really noticed the weight going on. I am just so embarrassed.

But your friends and family know you and love you, I hope. My friends and family have changed weight over the years, I notice but beyond that I think nothing of it unless they specifically raise it and want to talk about it. I certainly don't ever think they have anything to be embarrassed about. What is embarrassing about it? It seems like you feel that gaining weight represents a moral failing or some kind of character flaw?

Your friends and family will only be concerned about your health and happiness.

No one who loves you would want you to be embarrassed.

You did it before, you can do it again.