Where do I start? Suggestions please

[Highnone]

I’m 49, 5’5 and weight 12 stone 9.
I’ve been steadily gaining weight for the last 3-4 years, certainly since menopause. I’m taking HRT.

My lifestyle doesn’t help - I’m in a very stressful job, and work long hours with a 2 hour round trip commute. There is little time for anything most days.

Food wise, I struggle to prepare things for my lunch and so often end up with shop bought sandwiches and crisps. Dinner needs to work for my two DCS who are teens and my DH who doesn’t put on any weight really.

I literally do not know to start. I feel like o have no headspace or time to loosen weight, but equally I am feeling unhealthy and I believe the weight is aging me. My problem area is my stomach

so I would love to hear any tips or ideas on how I can start this journey, especially from others in the same boat.

If you want to lose weight, you have to prioritise it.

It's easy to eat very similar things each day, this way you can batch cook/prepare and it's easier to stay on track as you know what to eat for each meal and snacks.

Work out a calorie deficit and stay within them calories (this is easy to do, google/AI will be able to help)

Try and get more exercise into your day, simple things as walking up stairs instead of lifts, walk on your lunch break and when you're home.

It is so easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of life, but once you start eating better and taking more exercise, you do have more energy.

Thank you. Yes, I agree that I need to prioritise this.

I’ve just looked at calorie deficit, assume that an app will help you track daily calorie consumption.

Could Mounjaro be an option for you? I've lost over 5 stone since Jan x

Yes start counting calories first and work out how much you need to cut back. I use my fitness pal. Brilliant app.

I have thought about weight loss injections , I probably need to loose around 2 stone.
my main concern would be the possible gastro side effects, and the impact of this at work.

I started by working out my weekly calories and then did a 10 day meal plan. Meal planning is less time consuming long term so was worth the effort. It also means that I can batch cook so some days its literally defrost and warm up a meal. I also do food shopping online to stop temptation, buy snacks for dc that im not keen on. By calorie counting weekly I never fail because a bad day doesn't equate to a bad week.
I also did intermittent fasting which stopped me snacking in an evening.
I don't exercise because of disability so all my weight loss was calorie deficit. I've lost 5 stone and kept it off. I continue to calorie count so that I know im maintaining. I went from a size 14/16 to a 4/6 (im petite). I realised 1. How little calories I needed being petite and 2. That i needed to make lifestyle changes that fitted in with my family (because I'd be more likely to stick to it). I still eat the same as my family but I portion control eg today is mixed bean chilli with rice (I'll have a smaller portion) and dc who are teenagers will have tortillas as well.

I started Mounjaro in May and have had no negative side effects at all but appreciate everyone is different.

I'd start with small manageable goals for now. A couple of healthy meals a week in the evening, with enough leftover for work the next day?

The only exercise I do is walking, but I try and get out every day. So maybe adding that in where you can?

Unfortunately a weight loss plan will take time to work out initially. There’s no getting around it. Your two hour commute doesn’t help for sure but there’s no easy answer. I don’t think your BMI is high enough for weight loss injections but if that interests you speak to your GP.
However, I suggest downloading My Fitness Pal (or similar). Without restricting (the app will calculate a deficit calorie amount depending on your stated desired weight loss per week, but ignore that for now), log everything you put in your mouth for a few days. Everything - cup of tea, single bite of a cookie, taste of the food you are cooking. This will require you to weigh if homemade, but many prepared foods you can just scan the bar code and MFP will have the nutritional value (though watch that it’s per serving, not per 100gr). Forget about exercise/walking calories - it vastly overestimates these.
So after a few days look and see if there’s a pattern. Do you eat ok during the day but snack at night? Are you eating a lot mindlessly in your car? Do you seem to be eating a lot of processed high calorie foods? What do your macros look like? Are you eating protein at every meal? You may see something that jumps out at you - I realised the snacking I did after supper added 100s of calories.
Or you may see that the wine/beer/juice you drink is adding many more calories than you thought.
So now you need to start on a deficit. Aim for steady and slow - 1-1.5lbs a week. I find planning my week out and filling the diary in advance helps keep me on track. You can bank calories, though I wouldn’t go super low during the week so you can pig out at weekends! You might find intermittent fasting, which is just restricting your eating window to a set time, helps. Say you decide to not eat before noon and stop by 8pm. Then eating breakfast or snacking late is not an option so that may be enough to prevent you from doing it! MFP has a facility for that so you set a timer.
walking is the best exercise to start with and is free. 10,000 step a day is a marketing number, but try to aim for 8000. If you walk a lot anyway keep on doing it and maybe pick a route with a few hills or increase your pace. Weight lifting, Pilates, all will benefit you now and when at goal. But if all you can or want to do is walk than that’s absolutely fine.
Weighing your food is crucial. Portion size is one of the big issues even if you eat fairly healthy. Try to use smaller plates and bowls. I like feeling full, so I look for high volume low calorie density foods. Which basically means whole foods and loads of vegetables. I make a huge salad packed with different lettuces, cucumber, beets, carrots, small amount of sweetcorn, half an avocado, tomatoes, red onion, use low calories dressing and top it off with diced chicken or tuna or prawns. I’ll have half a bagel or one slice seeded bread or a whole meal pita with it. The bowl looks big, it takes time to eat, full of nutrients and the protein is satisfying. Or I make cabbage soup: cabbage, peppers, carrots, celery, tin of chopped tomatoes and chicken or veg stock. Loads of spices - cumin, coriander, bit of five spice, garlic and Italian seasoning, smoked paprika- whatever you like. So yummy and very low calorie! You could make it on Sunday and put a serving in a thermos for work lunches. But a sandwich and crisps on the fly is fine - log the calories.
I also find it easier to just cut out desserts rather than think I can just have a small slice or one of something. If it’s in the house it’s calling my name. You can have non fat yogurt with a bit of honey and berries, fruit, or a cup of tea with sweeteners (my sweet ‘treat’.
Eating out is tricky. I find if I say to myself ‘one blow out meal then back on track tomorrow’ doesn’t work - tomorrow never comes. So look up the menu in advance and pick out beforehand what will fit in with your plan. Stick to it! Ordering a starter as your main is a good trick.
Don’t wait for motivation to start. Start and the motivation will follow. I find it helps to have a concrete goal: I want to be X stone by this holiday or event. You eating healthier may mean the whole family eats healthier - it doesn’t matter if they need to lose weight or not.
It’s hard. With teens around it usually means tempting snacks are around too. So get in to the zone. Do you want to be writing the same post next year? No? Then start now.
Good luck!

Food wise, I struggle to prepare things for my lunch and so often end up with shop bought sandwiches and crisps. Dinner needs to work for my two DCS who are teens and my DH who doesn’t put on any weight really.

Sounds like you need to prioritise yourself, OP.

You’re out working too, so it’s not as if you’re home all day -why can’t your DH step up and cook for himself and the kids if they don’t want to eat what you’re eating?

Your health is massively important so if the rest of the family don’t want to get on board with your improved healthier diet thats a them issue. It doesn’t matter if your husband doesn’t put weight on, healthy food is beneficial for everyone. My friend did SW and her partner also lost weight even though he wasn’t really overweight to begin with, he toned up a little and feels better for consuming healthier food.

That said, it’s not like you all need to start eating plates of lettuce for dinner- so I don’t see why you can’t strike a balance that they all like. Again if they won’t compromise it should be over to your partner to sort out. And depending on what age the teens are they might want to start cooking themselves some nights, at least on weekdays.

So I’m 5ft 2 and was 12 stone 10 a few years ago and these are some of the things that worked for me.

I had to gradually start reducing the amount of takeaways, and sugary foods and UPFs I was eating . now I eat things like salmon and potato wedges, Korean chicken, brown rice and mackerel, turkey steaks and veg, low fat beef mince wraps. All of this is seasoned well and tastes great!

Sometimes I eat things like, bread, spaghetti bolognese, macaroni cheese , pizza or even cake! The trick is to have it in smaller portions with lots of salad on the side.

Getting better sleep has helped massively too - I’m not fighting my cravings as much when I get a good sleep and I feel as if my stomach automatically looks less bloated.

Easier said than done but it’s really important to manage your stress levels and get as much sleep as possible .

I went from being sedentary to doing low intensity workouts and walking throughout the day at regular intervals.

Oh and meant to add I’m now 3 stone down and just a few pounds away from a healthy BMI. This has taken a few years but I think that’s better than rushing the weight loss using some fad diet, only for it to all come back on. The chances I’ve introduced gradually are lifestyle changes and designed to be sustainable. As someone who went from ordering takeaways multiple times a week to now only getting them delivered to my home about once every day month I feel like I’ve also saved a lot of money.

I am glad I didn’t use WLI even if the weight would’ve come off much faster, but I would say if I’d been more consistent, and had less of a sweet tooth it would have come off faster though.

I’m very proud of myself for powering through and taking the time to address a lot of the underlying issues contributing to my over-eating and regular sugar binges.

Your BMI is 29.5 according to the info in your OP, so just below the prescribing criteria for weight loss injections which requires a BMI of 30 or higher. It can be prescribed if your BMI is 27 or over and you are one of a list of ethnicities where obese is categorised as starting at BMI 27. Or if you have a weight related health condition like high BP or high cholesterol.

Also, there's no point speaking to your GP about Mounjaro, unless your BMI is 40 or higher and you have at least 4 specific weight related health conditions (T2 diabetes, high BP, heart disease, obstructive sleep apnoea, abnormal blood fats). It's similar for Wegovy on the NHS.

If you did qualify for the injections, they wouldn't help with the main issue which is prioritising your health and not putting your needs last after everyone else's.

Can you identify why prepping lunch is tricky? Can you get things that are ready to go, or prep a weeks worth of lunches at the weekend so you can just grab them in the morning?

For the evening meals, I tend to have the protein and vegetable element of whatever I cook for everyone else, and have minimal carbs. I don't calorie count that, but make sure I do myself a smaller serving.

Hello all. A huge thank you - so many of you have taken the time to respond with so much detail. I’m really grateful.
I will reply fully tomorrow, as I am current travelling home from work late tonight.
I fully agree that prioritising myself is something I need to work on.