How to know when to stop

[Edinlassy]

I am so sick of this and realised it doesn’t matter how much weight I loose it will never feel enough. I am 50 years old and have been on and off a diet since I was 20.

I am now at a weight where I should be very happy but I still have in my mind just another half stone. That was there a stone ago and I just can’t seem to be happy with my body. Seriously worried I have some sort of disorder now as the scales tell me I am in a healthy weight I am 3.7stone down from my heaviest weight but still I feel it’s not enough. I am so so so sick of feeling like this I’m 50 years old why can’t I just not give a sh%t anymore and be happy with who I am??

What bmi are you at?

I have never been happy with my body, always something to criticise so whilst I have no good advice, know you aren’t in your own.

@KaitlynnFairchild thanks for responding. BMI has gone from 28 to 22. I know in my head i should be over the bloody moon and it just hit me today after so many years of this weight up and down I will never feel good enough about my body. It’s honestly crazy. U just keep thinking “another half stone” and I will be happy. I’m so sick of my own self if that makes sense if I was my best friend I would be slapping me

It’s hard, I’ve gone by my BMI and caution that I don’t want to look too gaunt in my face being 51 soon!

I still look in the mirror and see my problem areas though! It’s only when I look back at photos that I realize how far I’ve come. I’m a smallish size 12 now from a size 18 and I know I need to be happy, I’m 4lb under my goal weight but I do have this voice that says you could get under 10st. I”m 3lb away from that currently with no plans to lose more but I am struggling with maintaining and it’s coming off anyway.

Have you got progress photos? It’s very easy to forget where we started. Photos are a good reminder for me.

I do look back on photos and do see it but just don’t know why u can’t feel it if that makes sense. I’m just at a point if thinking christ am I going to feel this way forever it’s just crazy. I never thought I would see my weight start with an 8 and still not feel it’s enough it’s scary where your mind goes

@Doyouthinktheyknow soubds like you have done amazing!! Well done you xx

I get to my goal and then start criticising the other way, my bum is flat or my boobs are empty. My face is too angular. so I gain a bit and I hate my stomach and thighs and arms, so I loose it again and I go up and down the same two stone never happy at all.

I just go from how my face looks and clothes feel. Yes I could lose some more weight, I’m the same age as you and currently around 11 stone. I’ve been 10 stone 3 at my lightest in my thirties but I think nowadays I’d look a bit gaunt. I also like chocolate digestives so if I stay this weight I’m happy.

What do you do for exercise? At that age OP, and I'm early 50s, weight training is hugely beneficial. We lose muscle mass as we age and for women weight bearing exercise helps build bone density. You might find that working on your strength and fitness gives you a healthier focus?

I second that focusing on strength (balance, flexibility etc) would be the smart way to go and maybe see yourself through a different lense. Or take up dancing or something - enjoy your body!

Like others - would aim for middle of BMI and then focus on strength.

I really appreciate the comments there. Lots to think about starting I could certainly up the exercise to tone up. Have never done weights but my other half does so have asked him to start me off a programme.

If you can afford it I would try to get a few sessions with a PT. Not sure if you are menopausal or close to it but there are things to consider if you are. I have been weight training on and off (mostly on ) for about 4 years now and it has made a huge difference.

I can’t speak as someone who pays too much attention to the scales as I’ve never really had to, but when I see the number creep up these days it’s because I’m putting on muscle. That is a good thing at our age! I’m 56.