Feeling shit after weight loss

[poppetandmog]

I was morbidly obese last year, at over 18 stone. I’ve lost 4.5 stone in the space of a year. I’m now 13.5 stone, but 5’2 so still technically obese, with a bmi of 34. To be a healthy weight, I’d probably have to lose another 4 stone, but that feels so unachievable and I just don’t know if I can keep obsessively calorie counting for another year of my life. I have lipedema and hate my body. I honestly think I preferred it when I was bigger, as at least I knew how to dress for my shape. People keep telling me I look good but all I see is the flaws and how big I still am. I really don’t think I look much different to how I was at 18 stone. If anything, I look worse because my lipodema is more obvious. Not sure what the point to this thread is really - I suppose I thought I would feel happier when I lost weight but I’m not. Has anyone given up before getting to a healthy weight and accepted you are still overweight but still a lot healthier than you were before? I’m the lightest I’ve been for most of my adult life and I don’t know if I can keep going.

Wow what an amazing achievement, well done! What a brilliant thing you have done for your health! You should feel so encouraged. You could take a break from being in a deficit and just aim to eat to maintenance for a bit and see how you feel?

Could you afford to try Mounjaro? It makes being in a calorie deficit very easy. You’ve done amazingly well to get this far, well done.

Have you discussed treatment or management options for the lipedema with you gp?

Well done! It’s a slog I know and can become boring.
can you do a few months mindful eating and re visit the counting after summer?

I agree with PP, it sounds as though you need a bit of a breather. Your weightloss so far is amazing.

You have come so far and it’s a massive achievement and a massive benefit to your health.

I agree with a PP, try and maintain for awhile, then come at it again when you have had a break.

Maybe now you are lighter you can find some exercise you enjoy to help burn off some calories while you are in maintenance phase.

Firstly, well done. Be proud.

I lost 4am one years ago and I thought that when I was thin I would magically love myself. But I didn’t. I still picked flaws in myself, it was just easy to blame the fat for it all. It wasn’t the fat, it was my self esteem.

you need to learn to love yourself. Women are our own worst enemies.

also, I know others have mentioned it but could you look at the jabs? I’m on mounjaro now and it fakes the mental pressure off of calorie counting.

good luck op.

I am in a very similar position - was 18 stone this time last year and now five stone down at 13 stone with a BMI of 30 so still in the obese category.

The difference is that I am not so exhausted and worn down because I did this with Mounjaro. I have still had periods of time when I have found it tedious and frustrating but I've been able to ease the mental burden because the medication makes it an easier process. It's still hard, it still requires effort but it is sustainable in a way that every other experience of weight loss I've had over the past thirty years (and there have been so many!) simply was not.

But still, a year of steady weight loss and slogging away at the gym and I'm still obese and while five stone has gone, it makes other flaws come into focus. I am more reluctant than before to wear sleeveless dresses because I'm actually more self conscious about my arms now than before. I guess at 18 stone I knew I wasn't going to be able to fool anyone about my weight, but at 13 stone I feel like my arms really stand out. Sometimes I think I don't look much different to before - but photos from last summer make me realise that I absolutely do!

I know I can keep going because of the medication. Without it, I wouldn't be able to do this. But I also know that I probably won't ever be thin and that however much weight I lose, I will always be able to find fault with my body.

However, the main thing is - we are much healthier and lighter and freer than we were a year ago. I notice how much easier it is to walk up hills. I can do Pilates. I don't ache like I used to. Even if I didn't lose more weight, I have still transformed my life - and so have you. I think it's natural to focus on the negatives, but do remind yourself of how far you've come and everything you've achieved.

Thank you everyone. Sorry, I should have said but I initially was on Mounjaro but had to come off it as I developed gallbladder problems. To be honest, I didn’t find it all that helpful as I had a lot of side effects from it, so wasn’t able to move up to the higher doses. I think staying at maintenance for a bit is probably sensible. I am so scared to gain all the weight back but I just feel like I need a break. Weight loss has almost become my whole personality and I’m so bored of it. I do feel healthier (apart from the dodgy gallbladder) and have no doubt that I have improved my quality of life, I suppose I just wish I looked better than I do. I also had a hysterectomy earlier this year and feel like I’m maybe having a bit of an identity crisis generally.