I have a big family holiday coming up in a large group of my inlaws (DH’s side). I have been working on my health and fitness which includes weight loss for a long, long and I am nearly at my weight goal, give or take a few pounds. I am not skinny, I have been working on muscle and strength so I have some defined muscle tone arms and legs. I’m about a size 10 and I was previously a size 18. I still have wobbly bits and cellulite, who doesn’t!
I am more body confident now as in, I will wear a bikini or shorts but I don’t dress inappropriately skimpy or for other people’s benefit or attention, just the weather or occasion ie normal swimwear in a pool, normal shorts as it’s hot. Nothing tiny or too revealing. My bikini is a black two piece (with full bottoms, no bum hanging out) from Tescos!
I have changed some of my habits, I do not drink alcohol frequently and I do watch what I eat to some extent but I don’t have any special dietary requirements and I don’t expect to eat different foods. I just might not eat chips, or crisps, or have a small bit of cake instead of a large bit.
A couple of the female relatives going on the trip also have struggled with their weight and they make a lot of comments to me about what I eat and my weight, and talk a lot about their weight and how they feel about it. I do understand how it can become a hot topic but I try not to talk about it with them because I know it can upset people. They don’t like it when I politely decline food or drink and make a bit of a deal over it and I can feel pressured to join in even when I do not want to.
One relative has given up trying to lose weight, and one has never been obese in her life but is constantly angsting over losing one stone. I am half dreading this trip and it’s really making me worry about what to pack or whether I should cover myself up to make them feel better. I asked DH and he said no I should just wear what I want but it’s his family not mine and spending an extended amount of time together in a hot place where there is inevitably swimwear involved is making me feel stressed.
Also all the talk about food, them watching what I eat and even alluding to me having some kind of disordered eating when I am not indulging in excess food and drink stresses me out. I don’t really have a ‘holiday food’ mentality of letting completely loose eating all day, when it’s hot I don’t have a big appetite, I just like to try new local foods not eat chips and drink wine all day (chips you can get in any country). Last time I saw one of my relatives they said to me I needed to set a good example for all of our children by ‘eating normal food’ when I said no to eating cake.
Any advice on how to navigate this. I can’t not go