Can't get motivated/overwhelmed

[frettinglady]

There was a thread on here and the people were saying how they needed to lose weight. Most said they were around 8 and half stone and needed to lose a few pounds.
I know it's all relative but I am almost 15 stone and that thread made me feel very low in mood as these women are concerned about their weight and I weigh so much more so feel overwhelmed and tearful as I just cannot do it. My motivation is zero.
Everything is tight and I look awful and it is all my doing but I can't dig myself out of this. I know what to do in theory but three to four hours in I want to eat crap food and give up. It feels like I am never going to be slim again. I am not looking for sympathy as my problem I know there is no magic wand but I look bad. My clothes are uncomfortable. I am invisible when I'm out

You need discipline not motivation! Motivation can absolutely wain and falter, but if you are disciplined you will be able to see it through. If you're unhappy, focus that feeling into your discipline. 3-4 hours in and wanting to give up for food isn't a feeling no one has ever felt before! If it's sugar you're into, it can be addictive. If you can be disciplined and stick to it the cravings will go!

I do much better when I do things for positive reasons, not negative ones.
So I made vegetable soup for lunch today because it's tasty and warming, it's not punishment for the size of my arse.
I swim and go hiking because I like to do those things, so they make me feel good, my mental health is better, therefore I'm a lot less likely to scoff a whole packet of chocolate biscuits...

It doesn't have to be all or nothing, it doesn't have to be quick. It could just be a series of small changes that you like, feel a bit better for, and can sustain. I made my way down from 17 stone with that approach, working through and learning how to manage depression meant that anything involving more pressure or failure simply wouldn't happen.

I weighed more than you when I started and I am still not skinny there are plenty of us who are more like you, so we can help you!

The first point probably is reaching that crisis point where you think ‘I need to make a change’ and you seem to have done that. So what you can do is set little goals. You can pick a day to start your first goal and maybe it’s walking more, or not skipping a meal, or having a smaller portion of food, or not eating chocolate for a whole day. Don’t look at the whole journey as one thing you need to achieve, it’s easier to break it down. You could say ok by Easter I will have lost some weight and got more exercise. Then set about reading and downloading apps that could help you. You could look at how many calories you could eat to lose weight and then work out that that would look like in food. I don’t know your height so I can’t do it but google TDEE calculator. You will still be eating a decent amount of calories until you lose a couple of stone then it steps down, so it won’t be as bad as you think. Then you need to keep reminding yourself that you are worth investing in, you are strong and can do it and you are going to take good care of your health and take it a day at a time?

Tight clothes is pretty good motivation. If you start now you could be three stone down by summer.

I did two slimfast shakes and a healthy 600 calorie meal a day to kickstart my weight loss. For me it was better not to faff around with excessive cooking or eating tiny portions. The first week was hard but after that I just got on with it.

I couldn't face going to the gym so I did Leslie Sansone walking videos on Youtube while watching TV at night as my exercise.

Look at your life and try to figure out what changes are manageable. Then join one of the threads here for support and accountability. You can do it. 🙂

My height 5foot 4inches

Three stone would make me feel so much better

I am low in mood at present so motivation is very hard.
I Like walking and used to enjoy a walk with oh but they do lots of exercise anyway so usually too tired to walk with me these days do will have to get motivated again and do on my own.

Think how you will feel if you don't start now and get to summer, still weighing the same. You will have wished you started now. You've totally got this xxx

Well, the first step is to replace the crap food with delicious healthy food.

Which involves re-educating your palate, which up until now has been assaulted by sugar, salt, fat, flavourings, emulsifiers, etc - all the crap in UPF that makes it so 'addictive'/habit-forming.

So, instead eat lots of vegetables and lean protein, plus some healthy fats, dairy and complex carbs.

Try intermittent fasting, which works for many. Essentially skip breakfast and have brunch/lunch and an evening meal, plus a piece of fruit and/or a handful of nuts in between. It's a change of lifestyle but totally achievable.

Plus walking and exercise. Try:

• Lucy Wyndham Read - lots of short and easy workouts, and she is very calm and lovely
• yoga with Kassandra - ditto
• HIIT with Growingannanas - a bit more energetic

Ok so depending on how active you are, you need to eat around 500 calories less per day from these calculations.

If you are sedentary you can eat less than if you became a little more active

I also started on 1700 calories and it really isn’t too bad

Thankyou

Oh I get it! I go in a thread and see somebody being a drama llama that their life is over because they gained 2lb and I turn around so damn fast I figure I should lose some weight moving that fast!!

I'm 60lbs down currently from my latest high (lost 180lbs 10 years ago, but 2 difficult pregnancy's saw me gain some back, never all).

When I was that big I started small!
Went for a 10 minute walk, then it went to 15.
Started drinking 2 litres of water a day.

Why don't you try something positive rather than negative. ADD some good habits for now, then re-address the problems. Add a bit of fruit at breakfast and eat 1/3 less cereal for example. Have one slice of toast with mushrooms and eggs instead of a heavier fry up. Add a pile of green veg and eat half the pasta you normally have.

Pick something, start something, and succeed at it, no matter how small, it is a start.

I am reading all the constructive advice you have all taken time to write.
Thankyou
I have to now put into practice.
One of my big mental blocks is what's the point as weightloss will be so slow but if I don't start now I will be another three stone or more next year.

I feel exactly the same.

I'm almost 15.5 stone and 156cm - since having my children, I have piled weight on.

I do everything for them which leaves little time to sort myself out and have just let myself go.

I have just done the Zoe blood sugar test and found it quite demoralising as anything with a carb spiked my blood sugar.

I'm going to use Nuutracheck to count calories but I've been so hungry from trying to prevent blood sugar spikes. I'm going to plan my food and then start as I need to have a meal plan for this to work.

3 stone is about half what I need to lose but it would make big dent and help me feel more comfortable.

Im about to read the Glucose Goddess' book as she is good for controlling blood sugar spikes from what I have seen.

We can do this

Exactly but I know everyone's weight is a personal thing and some of the people who are around eight stone probably work hard to stay there.
I'm just struggling with food, exercise and my whole appearance.
I will try to do small changes every day like you said and hopefully build better habits.

Yeah we can.
I've done it before but few years ago now.

Hi - sorry only briefly read the whole post - but you need to find threads like 2 stone off before Easter and 10 stone plus to lose - they're here maybe a bit further down. Lots of people with lots to lose. 9 months ago I stood on the scales and had a total crisis as the number that stared at me was over 18.5 stone. Horrific!!! Anyway. I'm now 11.5 stone. I've been here on these threads and similar all that time and been determined!!

You can do this!!

Your weight loss is brilliant and you are a inspiration as I can't imagine doing as well as you have but need to try as really tight clothes, breathless and look bad.
Thankyou for your encouragement and everyone on here.

Starting with small, positive changes as @WeirdPookah suggests is great. It's also about reawakening your taste buds and learning to savour the more subtle flavours of fruit and vegetables.

If you eat lots of vegetables and a fair amount of lean protein you'll feel less hungry. Boiled eggs are your standby friend!

The Glucose Goddess is good, but I dont agree with her about drinking vinegar as it erodes tooth enamel. You might also be interested in Michael Moseley or Dr Becky Gillaspy who have some interesting talks on YouTube.

And here is a short and easy workout by the lovely Lucy: