OP, I lost 3 St, same age, same height etc as you. Had a household of hollow legged males.
Also didn’t want to make it public knowledge, and didn’t tell anyone.
I decided to focus on healthy eating, and made on adjustment at a time.
First to go was random snacking and toast ad lib. I planned one afternoon snack of a healthy and low cal nature. Eg 30g of Brie and 2 oat cakes. An apple and a square of dark choc. A small packet of salt popcorn. Small mug of cocoa (s skim milk, cocoa not hot Choc, half a spoon of sugar) with one of those Nairns oat ginger biscuits). I made sure I had these things in ready.
Breakfast: I did a spoon of low sugar granola, a spoon of plain Greek yogurt and frozen berries. Or porridge with semi skim milk and berries.
Next I tackled lunch. Some protein, e.g an egg, or baked beans, or tinned sardines or mackerel, or tuna or chicken, cottage cheese etc. One slice of toast and loads of salad. Shredded white cabbage with non calorific dressing. Grated carrots, etc
Dinner; normal family dinner, but I upped my veg portion and cut the carbs, much smaller portions of rice or pasta.
Alcohol: no more than 2 or 3 evenings a week and in modest quantities.
Excercise: just walking at that time. I made a point of long enjoyable walks in parks or to areas I hadn’t explored.
Attitude: I looked on all this as investing in my health, nurturing my body, doing good for myself. Made sure I enjoyed the food I did eat. If I went haywire occasionally (it happened a fair few times) so be it, didn’t beat myself up, just continued with healthy eating the next day.
Losing 1lb a week like this didn’t feel like a hardship.
It was great when my weight started to come down and I used that feeling of success to motivate me for the next week.
Once I lost a bit, I started to do more forms of exercise. Classes at the gym, weights, swimming. Nothing extreme. Enjoyed the improvements in muscle tone.
All this suited me and my lifestyle. I think each person has to find the method that best suits them.
Good luck!