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Weight loss chat

A space to talk openly about weight loss journeys and challenges. Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. You may wish to speak to a medical professional before starting any diet.

Best mates but no interest in me physically for long time

4 replies

secondlady · 15/10/2023 21:55

Oh used to always want physical relationship but interest went few years ago. I went up to 15 and half stone. Got down to 10 st but now 14 st and he is very caring hugs cuddles hand holding but I don't feel he desires me and I feel crap about self. My self esteem is gone and I just can't get control on eating again.
I feel overwhelmed with how much I got to lose and just can't stick with it more than two weeks. I think this is a big part of problem as it just is so much weight to lose I feel I am never going do it.
He has contact with lots of very slim attractive sporty women and I just look so different compared to them.
We only have physical relationship when I ask now and he seems to enjoy but I am fed up of initiating as this makes me feel shit about myself as I want him to desire me but that is long gone I think. We are best mates but I really am attracted to him but he isn't to me.
A few years ago we almost parted ways on his part but sorted things out but I lost my heart and now am scared but also paralysed and inside depressed about that time and how I look now.
Need motivation even to help myself but very low inside.
Can anyone give words of wisdom?

OP posts:
DustyLee123 · 15/10/2023 21:56

You might get more traffic in the relationship section

secondlady · 15/10/2023 22:31

I need help with weight loss so maybe I look better and oh will desire me. They love me lots but feeling desired feels good and I'm so fat I just feel bad but can't get the willpower or it does not last long. I am so unhealthy and unhappy inside.
I love my oh a lot but physically he not showing that interest he used to.
Don't blame him. I don't look good. He looks good. Other ladies look at him and me and probably think why he with her.
We are best friends.
Some chat to him when I next to him or touch him casually.

OP posts:
PlugHoley · 15/10/2023 22:35

I cut out a lot of carbs and lost 12kg in 12 weeks. I didn’t find it hard as my appetite shrunk. Could you try this, I concentrated on all the yummy foods I could eat and not on the ones I cut out?
Did he take an interest in you sexually when you were 10 stone?

secondlady · 15/10/2023 22:38

PlugHoley · 15/10/2023 22:35

I cut out a lot of carbs and lost 12kg in 12 weeks. I didn’t find it hard as my appetite shrunk. Could you try this, I concentrated on all the yummy foods I could eat and not on the ones I cut out?
Did he take an interest in you sexually when you were 10 stone?

Yes not like when we younger but definitely better than now. He is very caring and a great person and we love each other and he always says he enjoys stuff but I have to initiate now which wasn't case before.
I think weight barrier as I no confidence and hide myself too as ashamed

OP posts:
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