Where do I find the willpower

[Songbird54321]

I'm at a bit of a loss. I'm recently 30 and up until I had my second child 15 months ago, was a naturally slim person.
I was a size 8 for years. Had my first baby and was back in my pre pregnancy jeans 8 days later.
Fast forward to baby number 2 and I just don't recognise myself. I had hyperemesis when pregnant with her and was bed bound for months. I lost all fitness I had and could barely drink, let alone eat. Despite this I gained weight when pregnant, granted not a huge amount. After she was born I had awful insomnia and had zero appetite for weeks. I started antidepressants and things improved but having gone so long without being able to enjoy food I just went a bit wild with it.
I've put on 2+ stone and am desperate to lose it again but I just can't find the energy. I don't feel like I have time to exercise (work full time and have kids the rest of the time) and eat terribly to try and make myself feel better when it's obviously making everything worse. My actual meals are healthy as my partner makes them but I snack a lot (still sleep deprived and don't drink tea or coffee).
Does anyone have any tips on how to give myself a boot up the backside and actually keep at it, not just do it for a week here and there? I've never had to 'diet' before so I'm not sure where to start.

You don’t need a kick, you need a hug. You had it tough for more than two years if you include the pregnancy and now you need some self love to find your feet again.

Clear your house of all the damaging stuff. You don’t need snacks, nor do your children. If you are low, have blueberries or something else that is good for body and mind.

Think about nourishing and healing, not dieting. After months of depriving because too sick and then the opposite, it is time for you to find a balance. If you don’t have snacks in the house, you won’t eat them.

Ultra processed food, sweet and savoury, are engineered to hook you and make cravings irresistible. You’d better go cold turkey and substitute them for vegetables, fruits and a tiny amount of raw nuts.

Focus on you, on feeling better and looking great will follow. Take pride on your dedication to health. You definitely do not need a kick, you have suffered enough.
🤗

I agree with the above. Clear out all the UPF and starchy sugary carbs (cereal, bread, pasta, potatoes, ricd) , it will make a huge difference to curbing cravings. There will be an initial adjustment period of around a week but after that you will feel much better.

Allow yourself healthy snacks, if you feel hungry, nuts are great (although high in calories they are not all absorbed due to the food matrix). Full fat greek yoghurt, cheese are satiating, don't go low fat as you will just eat more. A square of dark chocolate or berries is good if you feel in need of sugar.

I would also try to reduce your eating window, maybe start eating for 12 hours a day and gradually reduce this to nearer 8. Hunger signals are mainly linked to your previous eating pattern so if you gradually move when you eat it will reduce the time you feel hungry. Lots of people loose weight this way as it lowers insulin resistance which is the main reason for weight gain (join the 16:8 forum on here).

Listen to podcasts on the science behind this. The zoe ones are good or Huberman Lab
https://open.spotify.com/episode/5VSvk8JFw0Y15KZdDAupNr?si=zQrZ9k0_R8G_F85XevOZhA

https://open.spotify.com/episode/1cYW1uBshjp7dvrbBjObQa?si=-JgSY35uQXak5Q-8qnt_qA

Thank you both, I have been shopping today and bought some healthy lunches and snacks to take to work.
Having some work starting in our kitchen week after next so great excuse to clear out all the rubbish.
Funny thing is, my kids snack on fruit, yoghurt, cheese etc most of the time so I have no excuse for buying the crap other than myself.
Only thing my eldest has a weakness for is ice cream and I don't like that.
I'm going to take it slow, get my diet right before I try and tackle my fitness.
I will definitely listen to the podcasts, I think I'd be more likely to make a permanent lifestyle change if I truly understand it all.
Wish me luck!

Good luck OP, that is so great that you have made a start. I found fixing my diet first worked best for me too, it was only when I started eating better I could even think about having the energy to exercise. Plus I think when you do a lot of cardio it makes you hungrier. I have been gradually increasing weight training over the past few months which I love now (I hated most exercise 6 months ago).

I often play the podcasts whilst exercising or falling asleep, they are really motivational.