Chronic fatigue, peri - is weight loss even possible?

[Aozora13]

In days of yore, if I wanted to lose a bit of weight I’d just up my exercise, ditch the booze (or switch to gin and slimline tonic…) and generally just row back a bit on eating too much crap.

Now I’m in my 40s and it’s a completely different story. I have long Covid/chronic fatigue so I can’t simply start exercising more without major repercussions. I barely drink or eat out anymore so can’t trim there. I have reduced snacking to the mumsnet approved 2 squares of dark chocolate (plus the occasional doughnut or similar). I don’t have huge portions (never have) and I’ve stopped eating breakfast but the scales are refusing to budge. I only want to lose half a stone so my clothes hang nicely again and try to salvage what can reasonably count as a waist! Any advice?

What's your bmi/tdee? Abs are made in the kitchen as they say so unless you drop your calories you're not going to lose, especially if you're a healthy weight anyway.

I get it Op, I'm 40's too and am currently eating 1000 calories a day - it's coming off veeerrry slowly but I really can't eat any less. It's so frustrating!

@Booklover40 I’m not sure what tdee is but my BMI is 23 so at the fat end of healthy.

How do you manage on 1000 a day? What does that look like? I’m worried that eating too little will bork me even more fatigue-wise. I guess this is the famous middle aged spread!!

Yes, it is possible but you need to totally rethink your eating habits. Cutting out sugar will be most beneficial to you, along with drinking more water and increasing the amount of protein you eat. Also, if you are perimenopausal, HRT will be a boost too - if your hormones aren't balanced (and in perimenopause they will be in flux, constantly), you will find it neigh on impossible to lose weight.

Have you thought of going to Slimming World? You'd lose half a stone in a few weeks of healthy eating and not even really notice you're doing it.

Btw, with a BMI 0f 23, you're in the middle of the normal range (18.5-24.9) not at the top end.

But, it would still be good for you to bring in better habits around food now - weight loss (and even maintaining one's weight) is far more about what one eats rather than exercising. So eating nutrient dense food, stabilising glucose levels and ditching sugar completely will only have a positive effect. Although that said, if you can add in weight bearing exercise then all the better, weight and resistance training is actually better than cardio as it builds muscle which in turn burns fat.

For now, look at getting a better handle on what you're eating and ditch the snacks, especially the donuts. Instead of ditching breakfast, eat something protein-based like eggs.

I don't know if there's any truth in this, but I've always read and heard that ditching breakfast makes your body go into starvation mode and you burn less calories during the day.

I do intermittent fasting op so started with dropping breakfast- I’d been doing that for a while anyway and then I found my appetite just naturally decreased until I found I didn’t want lunch either. So atm I’m just having a healthy evening meal (fish, chicken or whatever with salad/veg, also things like chilli/curry but cooked the slimming world way ie low fat, lean meat, no oil/butter)) and low-fat yoghurt & fruit for dessert. I do drink coffee with skim milk through the day as I think I’d go crazy otherwise and lots of water. I have a couple of extras at weekend like a g&t and a small chocolate bar but the best thing for me has been largely cutting out bad sugars and carbs. I don’t care about the sugar in fruit because it’s healthy and full of nutrients and I find the sweetness gives me that sugar fix. It’s not always easy though - of an evening I would sometimes kill for a packet of biscuits but things like that are just a bad trigger food for me - I can never stop at one or two so I just don’t have them.

In my 20’s I ate crap, never exercised and drank booze 3/4 days a week and was always naturally very slim. Now it’s hard work! Everything I’ve read about losing weight when peri/hormones seems to suggest that it’s due to appetite increase and basically what you put in your mouth but I can’t fathom this at all - otherwise why do so many women say they’re healthier now than ever but find it almost impossible to lose weight once they hit their 40’s? It’s very strange.

Thanks @highfidelity you’re right, it is mid-range. My waistline is in dodgy territory though… I have been thinking about reigning in the sugar - I do have a tendency to up the sweet stuff to combat tiredness, even though I know it’d be better to power myself with protein/healthier options.

Interesting you suggest going back to breakfast- I’m seeing lots of conflicting info between “most important meal of the day” vs “intermittent fasting ftw”.

I currently don’t feel confident in adding any exercise without medical advice - and have no idea how to find someone who can support w long Covid. Again there’s so much conflicting info on graded exercise or not I’m just a bit overwhelmed. But I could definitely skip the Friday doughnut!

@GabrielleLegs I did actually do weight watchers for a bit a few years back but I’m keen to avoid “going on a diet” and am more looking for lifestyle adjustments. Not least as I don’t have the energy or focus to commit to a plan at the moment. WW did really help with things like portion control which I stick to now.

@Booklover40 I feel like it’s hormonal or possibly metabolism linked as I too ate absolute shite in my 20s and early 30s and weighed a stone less than I do now rarely drinking etc.

I’m impressed with your approach - I’m not sure I could live without lunch but I could definitely eat less processed sugar and switch in fruit instead - especially now it’s getting warmer and more will be in season. No offence to apples or anything…

Breakfast is exactly what it is - break fast - the first meal of your day.

Just because many eat breakfast in the morning, that does not mean everyone does. Lunch is the first meal of the day I eat, so for me, it is breakfast.

Some days I eat eggs, others I eat a piece of grilled fish or a steak. What is the most important thing is to understand that if you eat something for your first meal of the day that spikes your insulin levels, you will spend the rest of the day lurching from blood sugar high to blood sugar low. Protein does not spike blood sugar and means you're less likely to have a sugar crash and reach for something sugary as a quick pick me up. I also eat my biggest meal for breakfast, and lightest for dinner, although if I am going out to eat, this might not be the case!

I suggest reading the Glucose Revolution. Lots of helpful tips in there.

Am not going to push for to exercise, I know from my own experience (as well as talking to others) that it's diet and what you eat that's key. I do intermittent fast in as much as I eat between 12:00pm-6:00pm, but I find that having a cut off time means I won't mindlessly snack on the sofa watching the tv in the evenings.

Your waistline thickening is absolutely to do with perimenopause. The fat that accumulates here produces oestrogen which is why in our 40s, this is where women tend to gain weight. I know that my waist did start to thicken, but it's back to what it was pre-menopause now. But, it was hard work and the last place the weight came off. It's also the first place weight goes if I so much as look at a piece of cake.

Good luck with everything.

@highfidelity that’s very encouraging. I feel like reducing sugar and having a protein-rich first meal of the day is something I can change without too much drama so I’ll give it a go.

I had long covid a while back and I feel like a lot of people don't understand it. Obviously I don't know how ill you are, but agree that increasing your exercise for the purposes of weight loss is a bad idea.

A friend of mine saw a dietitian at a LC clinic who said weight loss isn't a good idea. You aren't even overweight - do you think that you could put your weight concerns aside whole you focus on recovery?

Regardless I think protein rich snacks might be better for your energy levels (and leave you fuller for longer). I always had overnight oats and similar for breakfast. It was delicious with peanut butter, banana, maple syrup, vanilla essence and milk. Not low calorie by any means but will keep you going for ages!

Please look after your health whatever way you can though.

For your waist, maybe some yoga or Pilates exercises? Yin yoga is more about holding a pose so might suit lack of energy.

Or stomach vacuuming which tones up all the internal tummy muscles esp as you are at a healthy weight.

There is no truth in this.

It takes a LOT longer than a few hours for the fabled "starvation mode" to happen. Very few people in the western world have a clue what starving actually is.

A colleague thought she had long Covid (and perhaps did), but she now thinks it is currently actually more likely to be be peri-menopause.
For the fatigue, a decent menopause supplement is a good start, especially if there is a chance you may be not getting all the vits and minerals (and some Vit D).
For weight loss - a calorie deficit is always the way however you want to dress it up. A good breakfast is low fat yoghurt, oats and fruit (I use frozen cherries and blueberries) -perhaps add in some dried prunes for your bones - with a sprinkling of chia/flax/mixed seeds. Filling and very nutritious. (feel free to add cinnamon, turmeric etc if you want to get fancy).
Keep away from too much processed stuff (only eat things your great grandmother would recognise as food!) but for heavens sake, don't go all hair-shirt on it - if you want a Freddo have one!
Mae sure you have some fresh air. Even if it is a potter round the garden with a cup of tea.
Don't under-estimate the power of a nap.

@ScottishBeth I have verrrry long covid - since March 2020 in fact! So “recovery” feels quite different as I’m not sure I will ever get back to how I was. And maybe I should accept my thicker waist and lardier arse as part of that! I actually lost quite a bit of weight during the acute part (not in a nice way) but then later went onto have another baby so all bets were off. Are you all better now?

That oat recipe sounds amazing btw!

@Scottishflower65 what stomach vacuuming? It sounds slightly terrifying! I should try yoga again - I did a while back but it really triggered my post exertional malaise so I got scared and backed off. I’m definitely stronger now than I was then though.

Thanks @thoughtsofmoog3 I have been spending more time in my garden with the warmer weather and it definitely has restorative power. Unfortunately I can’t nap as I struggle with sleep (thanks long covid - tired tired everywhere but can’t actually sleep!) but I am getting better at resting.

I definitely have long covid but how much it’s exacerbated by hormone change i don’t know - I also don’t know how it’s affecting my hormones (my cycles have been silly since I first got ill, not helped by the fact I had a baby in between and only stopped breastfeeding a couple of months back). Given how little seems to be understood about either long covid or the menopause I feel a bit in the dark really!

I have definitely been leaning more on processed crap as I don’t always have the energy and DH is a many-splendoured man but not a great cook. But I feel like it would probably have wider health benefits to figure out how to eat more healthily, weight loss aside. And definitely no hair shirts, but I could probably dial back the medicinal Freddos…

You think that it will be impossible to lose weight but it isn't.
Your body isn't the same as when you were 25 so you have to train yourself to eat less, also you don't need that much once you are older anyway.
Try to avoid heavy meals before you sleep as your body, instead of repairing itself, will be just working on digesting your dinner.

There isn’t any truth in that, no.

OP, add veg and salad to your meals and increase the amount of protein you eat.

chicken, ham, protein drinks and shakes are all an easy way to do that.

Do you walk? Make sure you get no less than 5000 steps every day. More if you can.

And google the BMR calculator and find out how many calories per day will put you in a deficit.

Hi op.

I have had CFS & Fibro for several years and, during Peri, when my BMI got to just over 24 I took action by logging everything I eat on MFP.
I stuck to 1,500 calories a day and did lose the weight, and have kept it off. I was completely unable to exercise so it was all by calorie counting. It is possible.

Unless u were capable of 7hrs full pelt to lose just 1lb exercise is not the key to weight loss, diet is.

Two things I wanted to add -

Just wanted to say that when my hormones shifted for a third time in perimenopause and during the second lockdown/Christmas 2020, I did initially think I had long Covid/lockdown fatigue but after a few months, I did realise it was all perimenopause.

Also, another poster mentioned greek yoghurt which is a great source of protein. However, full fat is more satiating than low or zero fat. If you're eating no sugar and low GI carbs, you will be fine eating full fat - fat does not make you fat!