Acceptance

[GherkOut]

Not sure if this is the right place but...

I have spent over 40 years hating my body (I need to lose about 4st) and consequently hating myself.

I've tried all the diets - clubs, meal replacements, strict regimes, calorie counting. Yo-yo pattern, losing it and gaining it over several years. Back to square one.

Because I try and fail to lose weight I feel worthless, a failure, embarrassed. My other achievements in life are totally negated by my feelings of shame about being fat. It's almost as if I'll only be acceptable if I reach the holy grail of being slim.

Is there another way? Notwithstanding the health risks associated with being fat, is there a route to more self-acceptance rather than constant loathing?

Have you made peace with your body, even if it is fat? How have you done this and what difference has it made to your life?

I was watching this thread as I feel much the same way as you and was hoping Someone wiser than me would come along to point out how to reframe my thinking and show me how to be nicer to myself. Sad sign the no one has come forward with some better way. Ah well. Back to the diet I suppose!

How heavy are you now? Maybe think you could be heavier so could be worse. Also you have acknowledged your weight problem and want to put things right which should be applauded.

I found drinking homemade soup (more water content the better) non stop / as much as possible to be highly effective to lose weight.

Have you thought about therapy? It might help you understand why you feel as you do.

Failing that what about trying something more mindful like meditation or yoga or tai chi? Where you can spend some time doing positive but mindful movements with your body and maybe that would help you appreciate it more?