Hello,
Looking for some words of advice or even shouts of "Keep Quiet", "Do Nothing".
Apologies for long post.
DD is 15 and has been steadily putting on weight for the last year.
I have tried to largely ignore hoping she will grow into it with a bit of apprehension as I am not tall (5 ft 3inches) so she could take after me in height.
Diet at home reasonably healthy. I cook from scratch most days and we are vegetarian. She does eat veg and a lot of fruit. She is very fond of bready things and can some days eat a bagel for breakfast, sandwich for lunch and a brioche for evening snack!!.
Not sporty but she 3 to 4 dance lessons a week which are not intense.
She is very resistant to walks or family activities and does zero activity during weekends/holidays other than coming down to eat or watch TV.
She has been recently very unhappy with how she looks and starts to get teary while shopping often crying in changing rooms.
She hides herself in baggy joggers and hoodies even in the height of summer though she loves to dress like her peers in short/tight clothes and buys them only to never wear them.
We have been to the doctors who weighed her and she has a BMI of 26+ (weight 72 kgs and height of 164 cm).
This isn't largely overweight but we are of Asian origin and this puts her at risk of various medical conditions if left to continue. She already complains of knee pains during walks (not sure if that's just a moan to avoid walking).
Doctor has also done bloods and no issues there.
She has referred us to dietician and we are on the wait list which could take months.
In the meantime, I have taken a few steps like healthier breakfast swaps, packed lunches etc.
She also started at the local gym but realistically I am not sure how much of a help that will be.
I think portion sizes can be worked upon for all of us in the family so will try and address that slowly.
She does seem to have a big appetite so cutting portion sizes makes her eat more fruit after lunch and dinner.
Should I be doing anything else? Should we have goals for what we want to achieve?
She is in Y11 this year so I want to be as supportive as I can with upcoming GCSE stresses.
At the same time, when she despairs and doesn't know what to do to turn things around, I feel I have to step in more.
Even the NHS website recommends tracking calories for overweight teens and I have so far been reluctant to do this in case it leads to other body image issues.
However, we already have body image issues so maybe I am not seeing the obvious.
many ways and wishes for a magic wand when sadly there is none. She wants things to change but she says she doesn't know what she should do and often will not take recommendations from me either.
I am upset that I left it to this point and have failed her.
A typical food day
Breakfast
2 biscuits of weetabix or porridge
some fruit and greek yoghurt
packed lunch
white pitta with 2 falaffels and hummus
apple (mostly uneaten)
babybel light
nak'd cereal bar
bean salad with cucumbers, peppers and cherry tomatoes
After school (normally starving)
one mini toasted white wrap with grilled cheese
baked sweet potato wedges
boiled egg
Dinner
rice and dhaal with vegetables
nectarine
Writing this down seems like a sensible day of food (apart from the white pitta and white wrap) so not sure where we are going wrong.
Has anyone been in a similar situation that can offer some advice please?
Thanks very much