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Weight loss chat

A space to talk openly about weight loss journeys and challenges. Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. You may wish to speak to a medical professional before starting any diet.

12kg gain in 6 months.

26 replies

Obese · 28/01/2022 16:38

A year ago I weighed 117.9kg. 6 months ago I weighed 95.5kg. Today I weigh 107.6kg

I know how to lose weight, I lost 8 stone once. I just never stick to it. I think because I always try to do it in secret. I also have binge eating problems and when my mental health tanks then eating is how I console myself but it also feels like a form of self-harm.

Maybe posting here and knowing someone might read it will help me stick to it? At least a little bit longer than usual.

I actually started my newest bid to lose weight on Monday but I ended up bingeing yesterday and today I had lunch out and I didn't choose a very healthy option and it is so tempting to just say "fuck it" and quit already.

I don't think I actually want to though.

OP posts:
Obese · 28/01/2022 16:43

I'm trying to ease myself back in to it instead of going all out straight away. Get in to the habit of tracking everything, even if it is bad. Maybe it will help me?

Monday:

Cals in - 2159
Cals out - 3466

Tuesday:

Cals in - 3324
Cals out - 4156

Wednesday

Cals in - 2279
Cals out - 3914

Thursday

Cals in - 2434
Cals out - 2561

OP posts:
Bravenheart · 29/01/2022 07:30

Well that’s a lot of calories in, and exercise calories can never be 100% certain. I’d start eating at 2000 and go from there.

HomeHomeInTheRange · 29/01/2022 08:01

Don’t beat yourself up snd give up over a binge OP.

Are you getting support for the MH issues for which you current seek relief from via eating?

For many of us, ‘healthy eating’ is about eating that nurtures our health, an investment in ourselves, finding comfort in doing good for ourselves, rather than the seemingly punitive, deprivation angle of ‘dieting’.

Also motivation comes from success. Don’t wait for ‘motivation’ to magically inspire you, find a daily pattern of delicious, healthy meals that you enjoy, force yourself, even for 2 days, to hold off on less healthy snacks, and then be proud and pleased with the care you have taken snd allow that to fuel your determination for the next few days.

You are worth it! Your body is worth nurturing snd caring for with good healthy food!

How are you calculating Cals out? It seems very high, and cals in high too.

I lost a lot of weight by stopping snacks of biscuit, toast, cake and chocolate. Eating a filing but healthy breakfast, a modest lunch, and a ‘normal’ dinner with a sharp eye on the rice and pasta.

I didn’t actually calorie count as that was too ‘diet focussed’ for my own mentality, but I did weigh out some portions initially to get an idea of, say, the size of portion and calories stayed in the packet… it did make me think ‘ah, right, that explains a lot!’

Honestly, don’t let binges or mini binges set you back: every overall downward graph has little upward spikes along the way. It is worth moving on!

Obese · 29/01/2022 09:03

Thank you for the advice, I do appreciate it.

I know how many calories I need to eat but for this week I am just focusing purely on tracking.
If I restrict too much right away I go 1 of 2 ways - I give up straight away or I will starve myself. Back in 2016 I starved myself for 8 weeks and lost almost 4 stone. Then in 2018 I did the same thing and ended up hospitalised. Again in 2019 and I lost my periods and was malnourished.
I know I'm eating too much right now but I have cut out a lot already and I will continue to do more at a pace I am comfortable with.

I track my cals out with Fitbit. Having used one since 2015 I find it to be fairly accurate for me though I know it is not 100%. From previous weightloss attempts I know that if Fitbit says my weekly calorie deficit is -7000 I will be on track to lose approx. 2lbs. Obviously some things like period or water retention can affect this but it always evens out in the end.

Cals out are high because I am so heavy and I have been hillwalking. It's my favourite exercise and my average BPM is around 110 - 115 for each session. If I don't purposefully exercise my average cals out is 2200.

Unfortunately there is no longer any affordable treatment for binge eating disorder in my area so I am on my own there.

Weighing and calorie counting is really the only thing that works. I've tried portion control and all that but if I can't see the numbers it never works out. Always tempting to eat a little more because I'm still hungry or I'm sad or whatever and if I don't check the weight then I can convince myself it's only a tiny amount.

I have ADHD and ASD so my brain functions a bit differently.

OP posts:
HomeHomeInTheRange · 29/01/2022 09:19

OK, fair enough OP.

Starving yourself is definitely not a good tactic, long or short term.

Hill waking: brilliant! I wish I lived close enough to some hills / fells to be able to go weekly. It must be great for your MH and Vit D!

If you like things ‘just so’ would it help to write your own eating plan to stick to?

E.g
Breakfast: yogurt, berries, 2 spoons of granola
Or
Porridge
Or
1 slice wholemeal toast with scrambled egg

Lunch
Soup, salad, 1 slice of good bread with some protein

Dinner
Any reasonable option

Snacks
Oat cakes and cottage cheese
Carrot sticks
Apple
Etc

And write this up for the week as a menu? And shop accordingly?

Sorry to hear there is so little support for your eating issues. But you seem to have very strong self awareness.

Are you part of any hill walking Facebook groups? Share wonderful photos of your walks? It’s good to get affirmation and shared enjoyment of your efforts.

Obese · 29/01/2022 09:19

Friday

Cals in - 1942
Cals out - 3632

I had to estimate my calories for my lunch so cals in is not entirely accurate unfortunately.

OP posts:
Obese · 29/01/2022 09:43

Thanks for that HomeHome.

Yes, once I'm in the swing of things I do try and meal plan. I'm quite a picky eater. My typical day then would be like this:

B: 2 eggs, spinach, mushrooms

L: Tuna, greek yoghurt, cucumber, lettuce, peppers, onions or vegetable soup

D: Chicken, potato/sweet potato, broccoli, green beans

S: Miso broth, homemade jerky, fibre 1 bar

Calories - 1200-1500, always with -500 to -1000 calories deficit each day.

Weekends I make "special" meals. Healthier stir fries, chilli made with turkey mince and extra vegetables, roasted chicken with root vegetable mash and green veg, turkey burgers, fritatta etc. Each dinner is generally between 500-700 calories as I am hungriest in the evenings.

OP posts:
HomeHomeInTheRange · 29/01/2022 12:54

OP,: You’ve got this! As they say in American movies.

Friday was a great day!

Don’t know about where you live but here (London) it is a most beautiful day for walking. I went to the gym but I wish I had got up early and driven to the S Downs or Surrey Hills for a proper up and downer! (Went to the gym.., I like to keep my fitness up for my spring and summer walking holidays)

Obese · 31/01/2022 10:24

Thanks HomeHome, I appreciate your encouragement. :)

My weekend was a bit crazy, 2 unplanned meals out, including fish & chips on the beach, then dinner at a friend's house. I tried to track as best as I could without being able to weigh anything. Hopefully I have over estimated rather than under.

Saturday

Cals in - 2881
Cals out - 3428

Sunday

Cals in - 3466
Cals out - 3121

Ouch. But at least I tracked and didn't just say fuck it. Plus I did have a really nice time.

24/1 I weighed 109.1kg and 31/1 I weigh 107.1kg.

OP posts:
Annonnn · 31/01/2022 20:23

I have almost 100lb to lose (lost 12 this month) so my advice should probably be taken with a pinch of salt but remember not to deprive yourself of the food you enjoy and don't over complicate it.

Here's my story
A couple of years ago I lost 40lb doing keto, the weight came off but I spent the whole time craving carbs, once I stopped keto I quickly gave in to the cravings and gained back the 40lb plus 30lb more Blush
This time I'm calorie counting but I'm not so much focusing on how healthy all the food I'm eating is, for me that's a recipe for disaster that will end in binging, I'm working out what I can eat within my calorie allowance that will allow me to feel satisfied.

I should say, I have a hyperactive non verbal autistic 3 year old so i don't have time to prep a nice healthy lunch, I often just have a microwave lasagne or spaghetti for around 445calories, they're quick, easy and having pasta for lunch makes me feel like I'm not depriving myself.
When I took the time to make myself a "healthier" scrambled egg, cheese and ham on a sandwich thin for lunch yesterday I realised that I was left unsatisfied and the pizza I made my son actually had less calories 😂

At dinner time I generally have more time to prep but I keep it simple with something like a salad and turkey escalope or half a pizza with added veggies, really anything I enjoy eating with a side salad that fits in to my calories, regardless of how healthy it is.

Leftover calories at the end of the day go to a snack consisting of a piece of fruit and something yummy, like a cake bar or crisps. Today I had enough calories left over from my 1200 allowance for a satsuma, a packet of sweet chilli sensations and a galaxy caramel cake bar, so even though I'm dieting, staying under my 1200 calories I'm not feeling deprived because I still get to eat the food I crave.
I've managed to lose 12lb in January and not felt like giving up, there's no point in giving up when the diet isn't stopping me eating anything, they just have to fit in to my calorie allowance.

So yeah, don't deny yourself the food you enjoy completely Smile

HomeHomeInTheRange · 31/01/2022 20:57

Well done on your 12lb loss @Annonnn !

Your post does highlight the importance of finding what is right for you, and no diet suits all, however effective in theory.

And OP: 2Kg down! That’s brilliant!

Obese · 01/02/2022 11:33

Well done on your loss this month Anon and thank you for the advice. (:

Monday

Cals in - 1081
Cals out - 3289

I didn't feel hungry yesterday and tried to keep busy so I didn't just eat due to boredom or anxiety about my job interview.

OP posts:
Obese · 02/02/2022 10:21

Tuesday

Cals in - 1514
Cals out - 2716

Anxiety got the better of me yesterday and it is kicking my arse this mnorning. All I want to eat is chocolate. Thankfully no chocolate in the house though. I'm off to the 2nd part of a job interview at 12.

OP posts:
Obese · 02/02/2022 18:41

I got the job! Really pleased about that.

Drawing a line under today so I'm not tempted to eat the rest of the malteasers.

Wednesday

Cals in - 1355
Cals out - 3296

OP posts:
Obese · 03/02/2022 10:37

104.8kg this morning!

OP posts:
Obese · 04/02/2022 19:59

Thursday

Cals in - 2239
Cals out - 2647

Friday

Cals in - 1034
Cals out - 3010

OP posts:
MissManagable · 04/02/2022 20:08

I couldn't read and run without offering a bit of moral! I think you've got this OP!

(And congrats on the job Smile!)

Obese · 04/02/2022 20:17

Thank you!

Looking forward to seeing 99kg on the scales by the end of the month.

OP posts:
Obese · 05/02/2022 21:26

Saturday

Cals in - 1393
Cals out - 3820

According to fitbit my deficit so far this week is -11,076 cals. I will need to be disciplined tomorrow and not eat birthday cake.

OP posts:
bettydelrimple · 06/02/2022 07:40

You're doing really, really well OP. Well done!

Postdatedpandemic · 06/02/2022 07:53

Is the birthday cake for your birthday?
Is the birthday cake for one of your dozen nearest and dearest?
If so eat a slice.

If it is for an aquaintece's birthday, be disciplined

Try and make this the diet you can maintain for life.

Obese · 06/02/2022 09:29

It's DH's birthday but I think I'd rather have a bigger portion of the pasta we have planned for dinner than a slice of cake.

I bought a meringue bar from aldi which is 95 calories so that will be my treat.

OP posts:
Obese · 06/02/2022 21:57

I didn't do so well today unfortunately!

Ended up having dinner with PIL and went right over my calories and also have not done any exercise today.

Sunday

Cals in - 2947
Cals out - 2543

Ending my week with a -10,657 cals deficit. Not quite the -12,000 I was aiming for but it is acceptable.

Hope the scales still show a loss in the morning despite the insane amount of carbs I have eaten.

OP posts:
MalihaYakub · 07/02/2022 22:45

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

Obese · 09/02/2022 00:13

Monday

Cals in - 1951
Cals out - 3532

Tuesday

Cals in - 2359
Cals out - 4843

Unfortunately I have gained almost a whole kg, scales are back up to 104.8kg this morning when I was 104kg exactly :(

OP posts:
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