I always fail

[OhHappyDayyy]

Hello all.

I am not massively overweight- been slim most of my life until the last 5 years or so. Not sure what happened (GP thinks it's PCOS) but I gained a bit of unwanted weight- maybe 7ish kg. For 5 years I've "tried" multiple times to lose said weight, but never ever succeeded because of a sheer lack of will power. Maybe because it's not a huge amount of weight? I don't know. But the point is, I must have attempted to lose it maybe 10 times and I literally only last 1 week before I go back to my old ways. My issues are

1. I have a sugar addiction and so when I cut this out...

1. I am CONSTANTLY really hungry

And

1. I despise exercise because of how horrible I feel doing it. I have tried pushing through but I simply can't. I don't mind walking I guess but I've joined the gym twice before cancelling my membership after a month because I hate it so much.

Previously I have tried intermittent fasting (limited success) and the Insanity workout (I stuck to it for 3 weeks and lost no weight whatsoever so that was quite disheartening).

I really want to shift the 5kg. I don't look horrendous but I am not happy about it either. I've got a family event at the tail end of March and so here I am again... restarting my cycle of failure. Please help!

7kg sorry*

I was in a similar boat - don't have that much to lose in the grand scheme of things, but seem to have lost and gained the same stone over and over again over the last few years.

I've just read Eating Less by Gillian Riley and it has been a HUGE eye opener - I've been putting some of the points in the book into practice and after less than 2 weeks I am satisfied with much smaller portions than before, and not having snacks or second helpings (my downfall). I always suspected this was a battle I would win with my mind - somehow toughening up my willpower - and this book really seems to have helped to stiffen my spine. The "false justifications" to eat that the brain manages to create was a shocker to read and the whole framework around thinking about overeating as just a mindless habit was very powerful.

I don't know if I've lost any weight but I don't actually care now. I do know that I feel proud of myself for sticking to my "plan" for each meal and choosing not to have second helpings, my jeans did up so much more easily today, I'm sleeping better, have more energy, and the crack in my left heel that always hurts more when I'm heavier isn't hurting so much!

@Xiaoxiong thank you! Same here, it's definitely a battle of the mind and I know for sure that I eat from boredom/stress/anything else. I'll have a look!

What are you eating? Do you eat a lot of ultra processed food? That doesn’t fill you up and it’s also addictive.

I don't think I eat terribly...apart from sugar. I'll cut it out for a week and then binge :'(

On reflection I think I fluctuate- I'll eat really well for a couple of weeks and then just lose control and order takeaway and have 3 subway cookies (like the ones I just finished as I write this.

For breakfast I usually have either 2 scrambled eggs or 2 slides of toast with dairy free butter and tea. Lunch maybe some rice or smashed avocados or fishfingers. Dinner is usually something like strogannoff or tuna pasta bake or chickpea and spinach/chicken curry with rice. Most days I don't snack but if I'm having a stressful week then I will. I don't usually buy biscuits or crisps or anything like that but again when I am stressed, I do and once they're in my house, I make it my life's mission to finish them

Me too op.

And me

I'm the same!

Ok. Life update. I've come to the realisation that I just cannot deal with dietary restrictions. I can stick to it for a few days but then I binge. So this week I was just very mindful when eating, being really conscious of when I was full...and I definitely noticed that I've eaten less. I've also worked out everyday but one and that was because I was just too sore from the days before. I really hope I can make this last. I haven't stepped onto the scales yet and to be honest, I'm a bit nervous to in case my efforts have amounted to nothing. Will keep posting updates here!

Almost everyone always fails. Diets don't work. If they did, people wouldn't keep having to do them.

I feel the same as you op. Except I need to lose around 3st. I've read a lot of books including 'Why we eat too much' by Andrew Jenkinson which is the best I've read on the topic and was quite inspiring. I dropped bread (always causes bloating), but then find I take food from the cupboard when I'm not remotely hungry - I've no idea why I do this and it's not always sugar either. I just find myself contemplating what's in there. I do often just leave it though, but only if I'm in the right mood.
I hope whatever you're doing work op!

There's a thing called 'surfing the urge'. Apparently when you have a craving, you notice it, and then delay indulging it for 45 mins. It will subside.

I find that I can have something else instead as long as it's more nutritious.

So I crave a biscuit, but a few nuts and a yogurt will actually fill that spot.

Also, try and avoid getting to the craving spot. So eat regularly and plentifully- high protein, high veg- and you are less likely to crave.

One of my treats is an options hot chocolate made with milk in my milk frother. It's foamy creamy tastiness, but only a little options powder and milk as the foamer whisks it up to a mug full.

The absolute ideal is to address the underlying reasons behind turning to food for what appears to be comfort (just as you mention binging), but appreciate that's not always easy to access. There are some good online BED support groups though if you feel like it resonates with your experience. Second best is to just find something that works for you, for me it was:

Calorie counting. Not obsessively but just logging foods on nutripal and it helped me identify days when I binged and if there were common themes. Also helped keep me accountable and motivated to find nutrient and volume high but low calorie meals such as stir fry. I did 'binge boxes' which were lunch boxes with a controlled amount of calories in of 300, and if I felt the urge I couldn't resist I'd have one without guilt, and it was usually enough to stop me eating 1000+ in one go.

Setting a fitness goal outside of weight loss but of which would help (if that makes sense), so did couch to 5k and then a 10k race with my friend. It really helped to stay focused on a goal.

Drinking enough water!

I also found that the first few weeks were so hard, but after 12 weeks (feels like a lifetime ago I know) it became habit. I lost 7 stone in 6 months and have maintained that weight for 8 years now, and never miss out on foods and it finally doesn't control my life.

@Octopi I loved the idea of binge boxes, I will definitely use this one!

I've ordered new bathroom scales arriving tomorrow...I'm hoping seeing the numbers drop can motivate me to keep going! Workout day 6 just completed. Showered, knackered and ready to knock out :D

Sorry I forgot to thank you all for your tips! @octopi I'm hoping to get in touch with a therapist at some point. I did lose quite a lot of weight very quickly after giving birth but put it all back on plus more when PND hit me like a truck. So I think it was mainly related to PND, but I do have old baggage to work through regardless :)

Hellooo to whoever is still reading these updates!
1 week in I've dropped 3lbs! I'm really pleased. I've worked out everyday bar one, and have been VERY minimal on white rice, white pasta, white sugar, white bread. Have only had them if I've been out and had no choice :) Feeling motivated.

Congrats OP!! That's amazing!

You sound like me - I have a similar amount to lose s- tbc

Sorry, got interrupted. I feel my motivation is high but I get all indecisve about which approach is 'best' Which then turns into excuses to go off piste or keep snacking etc.
Anyway I'm now doing Couch to 5 k plus 1 HIIT class a week, and a bit of YouTube yoga to balance it. And I'm going to br more organised about prepping and planning food. Tomorrow will br:

Geek yoghurt and home made granola

Omelette with spinach, peppers and cheese

Salmon fillet with roasted root veg and salad

Not deprivation at all and I would lose weight with this kind of menu as long as I can stick to it!!

Hope you have a good week ahead too!

Diets (nearly) always fail. 95% of people put the weight back on. And then blame themselves for lack of willpower.

I don't think anyone said anything about diets? I'm looking to make permanent healthy changes in ways I can enjoy.

I hope you're doing ok OP. Do you have supportive people around you? That can really help.

Stopping sugar is hard, and the gnawing hunger is normal but it only take 5-7 days to stop. If you can get through those 7 days you will lose the hunger. Best way to do that is to eat plenty of protein and fat.

I don't advocate full on Keto or cutting out all of anything, good wholesome complex carbs are both delicious and good for you. The problem is too much cake, sweets, biscuits.....simple, processed carbs.

Make sure you have things like nuts, full fat Greek yoghurt (sainsburys finest range is bloody delicious), full fat cottage cheese (Langley farm one is great), boiled eggs. If you have these things easily available in the fridge or cupboard then when you get hungry they can be your go to food.

Honestly 7 days is all you need and you will feel better after that.

Also make sure you have water in the fridge and you drink plenty of it, your body uses it for lipolysis which is the process of breaking down fat and sometimes your body mistakes thirst for hunger so it's important to stay hydrated.