Emotional eaters, how do we break the cycle?

[Mumtumtastic]

Hi, I started a different thread this evening but wanted to start this one too.

Textbook emotional eater, always been. Yo-yo dieting has gone hand in hand with it, with fantastic losses ( can do it when really focussed) followed by fantastic gains with little successful maintaining in between.

Are there any other emotional eaters out there?

Has anyone been able to break the cycle, if so how??

Have a look at Brain over Binge, Kathryn Hansen,
Isobel Fixed Duke‘s work,
Also the app insight timer is originally a meditation app but now has LOADS about emotional eating, talks, meditations, courses.

I have done a combination of these things over the last year & my relationship with food has drastically improved. I am also about 2 stone lighter without really trying. I know, bloody miracle.

Therapy and a hobby.

Ditching stupid diets made up by people who don't live my life.

Me! I have been an emotional eater for 25 years and feel it started when I was in an abusive relationship with my daughters father.
I am now 9 stone over weight and spend most of my time thinking about food and googling bariatric surgery options abroad!
I work full time but don't really do anything else as embarrassed about size so stay home and eat instead. Vicious circle.

Could you focus on the practical bit for now - so you struggle with time / unplanned eating.

Maybe get DH to have kids for a bit and you take yourself out for a coffee to sit and plan an approach.

Snacks: fridge full of low processed, low sugar snack food eg olives, nice cheese, fancy cold cuts, cooked chicken / salmon, boiled eggs, dips, plastic tub of chopped veg.

Then make it DHs job to keep the eggs boiled / veg chopped and the rest is just bought from the shop.

Lunch / dinners: just do a list of 10 things that you know are quick / can be prepped in the morning then just put them on rotation. So you make sure you've got the right stuff in for each day, don't have to think and make prepping each meal a priority as soon as you wake up (!) so you have less chance of getting lost in the day. Even better, get DH to prep your lunch the night before.

I think with such small kids it's hard to tackle the emotional side properly but when you do I'd say some therapy would be the best approach. I'm 2 weeks into a 6 week block - no idea if it will work but I'm hopeful I'm finally making some changes at the root level at least

3) When I'm pulled towards eating in a way that is unhelpful, again, I don't get negative with myself about it. Instead I say to myself "I'm looking after myself."

That's not very clear. I mean that, rather than feeling deprived if I manage to resist, or justifying the emotional eating by thinking "I'm comforting myself", I emotionally reward myself before I even start resisting by reminding myself that I'm worth looking after.

Hi @Mumtumtastic. When did the emotional eating start for the first time? What is your first memory of realizing you were turning to food?

Those who said therapy helped, was it general therapy of emotional eating focused?

Terrible emotional eater..probably the last 45 years. Lost 2st low carving a couple of years ago, COVID hit, and I started the woe is me eating.

I have promised myself that the new year will be a new start..hope I can at least work some way towards that.

@Wombatsandstuff

I used to comfort eat, eat when bored, basically if I wasn’t doing something I was eating. The thing that worked for me was to get therapy. I had to pay privately but it was the best thing I ever did.

Liking this thread. It's very honest. What kind of therapy did you use @Wombatsandstuff?

I think I have overcome it by replacing it with exercise (not entirely sure that’s healthier sometimes!). The more I got into exercising the more I enjoy it and the endorphin rush it gives me. If I’m really stressed or anxious about something now instead of a family bag of crisps and minstrels I go on a 5k or go to the weights section and throw some weights around and promise myself I can have it afterwards if I still want it- 90% of the time I don’t.

@LadyCampanulaTottington

I have a weight loss coach!! She runs a weight loss program that is high protein and low carb (I’ve lost 3 stone since August) and she has an emotional eating program too called Emotional Eating Solution. The two combined have helped me so much!

If you can afford a coach I think it’s a great step to take. She’s been worth every penny and more to me.

What's her name?

@Laufeythejust

I think I have overcome it by replacing it with exercise (not entirely sure that’s healthier sometimes!). The more I got into exercising the more I enjoy it and the endorphin rush it gives me. If I’m really stressed or anxious about something now instead of a family bag of crisps and minstrels I go on a 5k or go to the weights section and throw some weights around and promise myself I can have it afterwards if I still want it- 90% of the time I don’t.

Have been thinking of this as my plan for the new year. Really need to get back into exercising!

Hi everyone, happy new year to you all for tonight/ tomorrow! A good time of year for a fresh start and try and make some helpful changes.

Shall we all think of one thing we would like to start from tomorrow?

I am going to start the day with a pint of water (am crazy thirsty in the morning anyway after a night of feeding bub) and have another pint late morning, before lunch.

Happy new year everyone.
I am hoping to be more active and do more crochet in the evenings to keep my hands from going to my mouth?

@Sunshineandrainbow

Happy new year everyone. I am hoping to be more active and do more crochet in the evenings to keep my hands from going to my mouth?

Won’t resolve any of the emotional eating issues. You need to identify what emotional need you thing that food at that time is going to meet, understand that it won’t/can’t and work out what will.

Eg, eating chocolate cake won’t stop you feeling stressed. But a bubble bath, massage or nap might. If you’re upset, a hug or chat with a friend will meet that emotional need better than a multipack of crisps.

If you don’t address the underlying need, any “activity” isn’t going to work for long.

I'm going to start going for a short evening walk by myself - I went for one last night and really enjoyed it. This is in addition to the dog walk I do with DH earlier in the day.
I'm also going to start using my audible membership more. It really helps to make and train journeys housework enjoyable - but it is still an emerging habit.
They're are other things I am continuing to master that are more thought/reaction based and not as easy to explain.
Happy New Year!

Hiya, I’ve managed to do my pints of water drinking and more generally throughout the day, now working on curbing the evening snacking!

Sunshineandrainbow How is the crochet and bring more active going?
Crepusculum hope you are enjoying your evening walks 🙂

That’s great @Mumtumtastic
Didn’t go for an evening walk yesterday - ridiculously forgot about it! I think what I’m going to do is make a visual reminder of things that I could do rather than mindlessly eat until these habits are just there.
Delaying eating until at least 3 pm is going well. I’ve decided not to calorie count and concentrate on eating and cooking foods I really want (and that will include a lot of veg and some fruit) and add in a 3+ hr gap between my first meal and second.
Saturday kitchen really inspired me yesterday! In particular the chef Saliha Mahmood-Ahmed and guest Jake Humphrey - I’ve now got their respective audible books/podcast ‘Foodology’’ and ‘High performance’ ready to go.