Just weighed myself and I'm 15 stone :(

[MyComputerGetsSadWithoutMe]

I knew I had got fat, I can't deny that, I lost 5 stone 5 years ago and it stayed off until last year, during lockdown my mental and physical health declined and I've been suffering with binge eating disorder, bad depression and some problems with my kidneys. But things are starting to improve now and I have weighed myself and I now weigh more than I ever have before.
I don't want to wait until January to start, I want to start now because I'm sat in floods of tears :(
How do I overcome that constant need for food even when I'm not hungry? :(

One step at a time, that's what I tell myself. Also, it isn't a moral failing to have put on a bit of weight. In fact, it's an evolutionary trait, especially for women, and especially during times of stress, which I think a worldwide pandemic qualifies!

Make one small change that you can stick to, and do that for 30 days. That's how long it takes to form a habit. Drink more water? Cut back on sugar or alcohol?

Just do one thing, and be gentle with yourself.

Don't be sad about it, the good thing is that you want to make a change and that's the most important thing.
I'm in the same boat, am up 2 stone since Lockdown, as food has been the only comfort to me throughout everything. Which is silly, because being overweight and not fitting in my clothes makes me feel sad too!
I've decided that I'm not waiting until January, so I've started intermittent fasting. I find it works best for someone like me, who thinks about food far too much. I just delay my first meal as l long as I can, at the beginning it might only have been 11am, but now I can often get to 12/1pm. Then I have a sensible lunch, soup with protein/salad with protein, then maybe a banana and some peanut butter for a snack around 3/4, if I'm hungry and then a normal dinner in the evening. I try to only have carbs at one of my meals.Then I stop eating after dinner, no snacking at all in the evening, as I try and only eat in that 8 hour window of 11-7, 12-8, 1-9.
At the beginning, the focus should be on just keeping to your 8 hour food window. That stops night-time snacking, which is my worst habit and the habit that has led to most of my weight-gain. I've lost about 8 pounds over the last month or so doing this and am aiming to continue up until Christmas. Even if you put some of it back on, it's better than waiting until January and then having to lose even more weight.
Hope that helps a little, but I know exactly how you feel. There are lots of us in the same boat.

I’m sorry you’re feeling so rubbish. I just had a similar experience - weighed myself this morning for the first time in months and I’m almost 13 stone. A healthy weight for my height would be about 10.7 . I was a healthy weight about 4 years ago but since having dc3 3 years ago just haven’t been able to lose the baby weight. It’s miserable. I put on almost a stone over Christmas last year and I haven’t really lost it over the year, so I really want to make sure I don’t do that again. I think I need to start now too. I’m an emotional eater - that’s what I need to get a handle on. I eat without thinking and I’m always tired from dcs and work and lack of sleep, so I make poor food choices.
Try not to be too hard on yourself. We can do it and it’s amazing that you lost so much weight before.

Thank you for the responses, it makes me feel a bit more like I can do it. So for December after reading them, I've picked two things I think I can do. Intermittent fasting and drinking more water. Then maybe I'll try and add something else in January but I don't want to make myself feel overwhelmed.
Thank you.
@missmillimentscardigan we can do it together, you sound as down as me, I eat very emotionally too!

@MyComputerGetsSadWithoutMe That's a great idea. Small changes, just trying to be consistent with it.

I've also asked myself, how would a slim person react to this meal? Situation? We had a Thai takeaway at the weekend and instead of eating my whole curry, plus rice, maybe chips, I made myself a plate of food with a scoop of curry, scoop of rice and about 4 chips. Had a lovely treat, but didn't feel sick or bloated afterwards. It's hard trying to train yourself not to be greedy!

You have taken the first step and now you know what you weigh. Now you have a starting point to work from. What worked from me was cutting out junk calories including all alcohol and recording everything in mfp. Keep moving each day. Walking is good, but pick what you like. Make it a rule to do something active every day. It will improve your mood and make you less likely to comfort eat. You’ve done it before and you can do it again!

Research. There is nothing like it to get to understand the problem. Find out the truth about carbs and what they do to us.

I am bedbound waiting for surgery for over a year now. I have cut all carbs out or I would be huge. Feel tonnes less inflamed and ill as a result.

I am a food addict but by research and learning, I am much more in tune and therefore more able to handle it.

@Rissole

It's hardly being addicted to food isn't it? With any other addiction, we could just go cold turkey. But with food, we have to try and eat a little bit of It each day, enough to feed ourselves, but not to gain weight. I find it so hard.

@Rissole Apologies, that word was meant to be hard instead of hardly!

Oh, OP, don’t be so hard on yourself.

For me, I only got to grips with healthier eating (I didn’t go on a diet) when I decided my body, and me, were worth nurturing and treating well. That healthy eating was an investment in myself.

Even one small change (for me it was butting out unhealthy / excess snacks) can make a significant difference, and a small success made me feel better about myself and therefore motivated to treat my body even better, iyswim.

I lost 3 stone simply by cutting out snacks (except for things like carrot sticks or an apple), having a healthy breakfast that I enjoyed, a balanced and not excessive lunch, and a normal dinner but very sensible on portion control for carbs or anything very fat-rich.

And I aimed for 1lb a week, so progress was slow and steady. And the changes I made were sustainable.

It did take a week (maybe 5 days) for my sugar craving and appetite to reduce. Habit is everything! But once I was in the new habit it was really not that hard.

And don’t be defeated by bad days. So, you ate a multi pack of Twirls (yes, I did that in the middle of a period where I still lost weight overall), so what, don’t beat yourself up, just move on and back to healthier eating or whatever approach suits YOU.

Enjoy your body. When no one is looking jump up and have a bit of a dance to the adverts on TV. Take a short brisk walk. Use lovely body lotion. Every evening list 3 things you achieved, however small.

You aren’t a bad person OP, your focus was elsewhere and weight crept on. No big deal, now you can ease it right back off again.

Good luck!

OP and others! You have inspired me! I’m going to try my very hardest from today. I also weigh 15 stone, and a lot of that is recent, and mainly due to emotional eating. I am going to

1. Meal plan/track on app
2. Drink more water
3. 2 days a week very low calorie/fasting
4. Eat/think like a slim person.

Can we keep the thread going? Daily/weekly?

I felt like this back in August when I had hit 18 stones 3lbs then when browsing this board I came upon the New You Plan thread. I had lost 4lbs on my own when I started on 14th September. I weighed in this week at 14.7. Almost 4 stones down. If I can lose 2lbs this week, that will be 50lbs in 12 weeks.
I went for total food replacement to take away my emotional eating response but the packets are genuinely nice. Yesterday I had a banana shake, leek soup, Mexican Tacos and a chocolate meal bar.
Have a read of our thread . Xx

Harness the power of yr shock without trash talking yrslf.

I lost 2 stone last year and put it all back on again then. So keto is not for me i realised. Im not berating myself for regaining the weight. It was a reaction.

So i was 11 stone (again!) in August now im 10. Not the fastest weight loss story ever i know but im being more self compassionate this time around. Im 5 foot 1 and still need to lose some more but unlike last time when i lost 2 stone quickly doing keto, this time im "just" low carb and finding it easier. It suits me and that matters.

Construct a plan that wont be impossible for you and take it a day at a time.

If your weakness is hunger, allow fats.

It is easy to do. I put on 2 stone in the lockdown last year but have managed to lose it again. My husband had open heart surgery a few months back and I consequently baked cakes and prepared snacks every few hours to help him put on weight (he is very thin) and gave up some of my exercise sessions and day hikes to stay home with him. He didn't put on a pound but I put on half a stone. Some people are just more inclined to put it on easily.

I cut out sugary stuff and the bad stuff completely when I know I have put on weight and it comes off easily then. Drinking more water is good. I swap sugary snacks for healthy ones so instead of crisps/biscuits/cake I go for a piece of fruit/lump of reduced fat cheese/low or zero fat Greek yogurt or rolled up slice of lean ham on a lettuce leaf. Cut back on bread. Walk 10000 steps a day not only for the exercise but also when you are walking you are not eating.

I found intermittent fasting really helpful too and have lost nearly three stone. Started off at 16:8, then 18:6 and most days now 20:4 or smaller eating window. I like that it’s flexible. I recommend Gin Stephens’ Fast, Feast, Repeat book or her intermittent fasting podcast. I think I do best with rules and knowing that I won’t be eating anything for part of the day seems to make it all easier. I also don’t really like counting calories so just eat what I feel like during eating window - although try not to feel like too much sugar.

You have an eating disorder, please don't take diet advice from people on here even if they mean well. Cutting things out of your diet is the worst thing to do because it will just lead to more binges, which is the horrible cycle of the disorder as I'm sure you know. You need to see a professional who can help you overcome the disorder properly. I know it's difficult but you can get there. I'd advise you to not look at the diet threads on here while you're trying to recover. I wish you well

@EdgeOfTheSky

Oh, OP, don’t be so hard on yourself.

For me, I only got to grips with healthier eating (I didn’t go on a diet) when I decided my body, and me, were worth nurturing and treating well. That healthy eating was an investment in myself.

Even one small change (for me it was butting out unhealthy / excess snacks) can make a significant difference, and a small success made me feel better about myself and therefore motivated to treat my body even better, iyswim.

I lost 3 stone simply by cutting out snacks (except for things like carrot sticks or an apple), having a healthy breakfast that I enjoyed, a balanced and not excessive lunch, and a normal dinner but very sensible on portion control for carbs or anything very fat-rich.

And I aimed for 1lb a week, so progress was slow and steady. And the changes I made were sustainable.

It did take a week (maybe 5 days) for my sugar craving and appetite to reduce. Habit is everything! But once I was in the new habit it was really not that hard.

And don’t be defeated by bad days. So, you ate a multi pack of Twirls (yes, I did that in the middle of a period where I still lost weight overall), so what, don’t beat yourself up, just move on and back to healthier eating or whatever approach suits YOU.

Enjoy your body. When no one is looking jump up and have a bit of a dance to the adverts on TV. Take a short brisk walk. Use lovely body lotion. Every evening list 3 things you achieved, however small.

You aren’t a bad person OP, your focus was elsewhere and weight crept on. No big deal, now you can ease it right back off again.

Good luck!

Thank you for this. I'm not OP but I was reading this because I'm the same size. In the last year I've had two miscarriages and lost my business. I've put on nearly 4 stone and really need to lose weight so I can try for a baby and actually feel healthy.

Of all the things I've read your comment really resonated with me the most. I feel like a lightbulb has pinged in my head that my main motivation should be feeling better, and treating myself with a bit more kindness.

Thank you so much.

Fasting when you binge is not recommended that is correct, as breaking the fast could be extra challenging for you.

I'm so glad so many people replied! It's given me a bit of encouragement and willpower, yesterday I didn't snack and I drank lots more water than usual, today I have done a beginner cardio video and just had a simple breakfast of porridge, I managed to fast for 14 hours, I'll work up to more!
Thank you everyone!

I'll be extra careful with the fasting and I am on a waiting list for CBT relating to the bingeing so hopefully that will help.
If I start feeling I can't manage I'll stop. I'm also trying to learn to love my body and not worry about how I look, focus on my health instead. Thank you everyone.
I don't think I'll count calories because that lead me down a very unhealthy route last time and I was obsessed and never wanted to eat more than 700 calories a day, it seems I've gone from 1 extreme to the other.

I'm sick of my weight taking up a significant lump of my mental energy. I feel dreadful. My fat rolls squash up against my boobs in the car, my clothes either don't fit or are uncomfortable, every outfit I wear just looks crap to me.

I've signed up for exante. It's a verily low calorie meal replacement diet.

FOR ME, it gets rid of the constant thinking of calories, fat etc etc and I just eat 4 of the meal replacements a day.

I know others won't agree with this, but it works for me.

I’d agree that intermittent fasting is a great start. I have a decaf coffee for breakfast. Then drink about two pints of water in the morning start feeling hungry about 1pm. Lunch, dinner and then a little treat in the evening. I’ve lost five kilos in the last two and a half months. Getting to bed early also helps as ten pm is my witching hour where I eat and watch rubbish.

@SunDance21 Thank you for such lovely feedback. The more we all acknowledge and share that we are worth it, the better! Weight loss should surely, never, be about punishing ourselves for being overweight, but about valuing ourselves and stepping into a healthier future, where we feel
Happier with ourselves. Which is something to celebrate, every small step forwards.

@MyComputerGetsSadWithoutMe

You are on your route! You sound strong, clear and self aware. I hope you get the support soon.

Here's my tips:

Don't drink calories i.e. Full fat Coke, orange juice, milky lattes etc. Just drink filter coffee, tea with a splash of milk, diet pop, water. Same with alcohol. Try and stick to low cal stuff.

Have a big bowl of homemade vegetable soup before every meal ( no bread).

Don't have your kryptonite in the house. Just don't buy it.

Snacks : an apple, cottage cheese, grapes, soup, hard boiled egg, sliced ham. Think protein and a bit of fat.

Good luck op, it's hard but worth it.

Good luck with the CBT, OP. I did some a couple of years back for depression and low self esteem, and it has helped me catch myself and take a step back when I'm getting into a negative spiral since then.