Just realised I have gained 30kg

[MrsOk]

How do I lose weight. Help me.

I have heard of stories where people have gradually gained loads of weight over the years but I've just come to the realisation I am one of the stars of this show.

Over the last 7 years, I've gone from 70kg (which I always felt I needed to lose a little) to a staggering 100kg. Fair enough, I've had two DCs in between that time, but I'm wondering to myself, how did I let it get this far? I'm fairly active (take walks as much as I can), eat a healthy meal most of the week (subscribe to hello fresh) and cook a recipe I've had before on other nights. (Maybe takeouts once in 2 weeks or so). Mostly I don't have breakfast and eat a sandwich or salad for lunch (hate soup).

I don't think I binge on sweet things or unhealthy things although I do have my fair portion of them. I don't drink so much, maybe once in 2 weeks or even once a month on a lot of occasions.

I want to lose all this weight but don't know where or what to change in my lifestyle. I do not want to go on drastic diets as most of the time, people put all that weight back on. I am looking for how and where I can change my lifestyle without going to the extreme. My DCs are 1 and 5 and I work full time, so limited on time for most things.

What methods do you normally use to stay fit. I feel I do the right things but get the wrong results. Please someone HELP ME.

Count your calorie intake and how much you burn - only way to drop the lbs is to be in a deficit. Be sure to tack the calories in butters/ oils/ sauces/ drinks etc as well.

I use MyFitnessPal app to track my calories & protein intake, and track steps (10k a day burns roughly 500 calories!). I went to a PT who worked out how many calories I should be having but I’m pretty sure you can Google something like “maintenance calorie calculator” and then simply subtract 500 from that you’d get a 1-2 loss a week.

Also - good luck!

Hi @MrsOk

I lost about 20kg over a period of 9 months. I did it slowly and steadily and have never re-gained it. You will get a lot of recommendations here for fasting or low carb diets, but I did it the “old fashioned way” and it worked for me!

I think you will be eating way more calories than you think. As a first step, I’d get familiar with the My Fitness Pal app and log everything you eat and drink over a week. Literally everything down to the milk and/ or sugar in your tea and coffee.

Then work out how many calories you expend on a regular day. Many websites will help you with this. Google “basic metabolic rate”. You need to eat under this amount (taking into account how active you are and any exercise you do) to lose weight.

My diet is fairly balanced (each meal contains protein, a small amount of wholegrain carb (sometimes not in the evening) and LOADS of fruit or veg). Track your portion sizes using MFP though until you get the hang of what your plate should look like.

I don’t eat refined sugar hardly ever and I honestly don’t crave it now. I think the intense craving does pass! I have a couple of glasses of wine and/ or a G&T over the course of a weekend

I am very active now and have a few physical hobbies, but when I was first losing weight I did three cardio classes a week at the gym. This, along with monitoring my diet so I wasn’t way over my recommended daily calories, meant I lost weight pretty easily. I think you can too! 💪🏼 The main change for me was thinking: this is a new, healthier and happier way of living for me. Rather than: I am slogging through this to lose weight.

Ha! @Reduceddutiesboredom said it more concisely and coherently! I agree!

Start by writing every single thing you put into your mouth down. I remember talking to a doctor once who said people massively underestimate how much they eat and when you get them to do that they are always surprised.
Also no picking, he also said people have a meal before they have a meal by constantly tasting what they are cooking
Low carb and intermittent fasting seem to be relatively easy ways to lose weight. I would up the walking and you need to go fast for at least an hour. If you can do 2 hours, morning evening even better. I know someone who shed the weight by doing all of the above and relatively quickly too

Thanks a lot. Yes, I need to download that app to help. Always looked at it as a faff but that's probably where I need to start from.

Maybe I do eat more than I realise and the calories intake are more than needed.

Someone did recommend intermittent fasting to me but is it one of the situations that if I stop it, I gain all the weight back?

If you went back to the way you eat and live now then yes, you’d put weight back on. Just because of the calories in- calories out thing.

I guess it’s what works for you and what is sustainable. I would be miserable missing out on a meal while my friends or family were eating because I was fasting. I’d be miserable trying to eat my allotted calories within an 8 hour window too I think! I’d end up giving up. I love to cook and eat with friends/ family, so my preferred method was to eat a more balanced diet, counting the calories (and maybe that meant having a slightly smaller plate than others while I was actually losing the weight) and exercise.

A log is really useful for people in your situation.

Start keeping a log but do not tailor your intake to the fact your are doing so. As in, don't "be good" at first because you're writing it down. Log everything and log the calories along side it.

IF works great because it likely has some extra benefits on top of naturally/more easily creating a calorie deficit - although beware no diets work if you are not in a calorie deficit. Even if you only eat one meal a day if that meal is 3000 calories you will still not lose weight, obviously.

The Lose It reddit has a very useful beginners guide and they also recommend starting with just logging as 1) you can see where you improve from and 2) it gets you into the habit of logging.

If you are in the UK, Nutracheck is better than MFP in my opinion. It has more UK foods, and the numbers are correct as they are not user entered.

Thanks a lot all. Downloaded the fitness app yesterday and logged everything I ate. It was a normal day generally - mist of my days are like this in terms of food. I ate 1700 calories and lost 300 calories in exercise. I will keep logging fir the next 2 weeks to see where major calories might come from.

Thanks for all the suggestions. They've all been great.

@ItsAllGoingToBeFine

If you are in the UK, Nutracheck is better than MFP in my opinion. It has more UK foods, and the numbers are correct as they are not user entered.

Thanks very much for this tip. Just downloaded Nutracheck and it looks great so far. I couldn't get on with mfp as I found it a bit faffy and rigid.

Hope you are doing ok op and feel better now you have a plan.

My fitness pal, and focusing on maxing out protein and fibre helped me. If I eat more than 1500 calories a day I put on weight. Modern packaged foods are sugary carby hell. Also, I know it’s the recommended intake, but any woman eating 2000 calories a day, without doing hours of exercise, will put on weight.
If you can replace breakfast with a couple of apples, replace snacks with salad (no dressing), cut down bread etc you’ll lose weight. Get used to feeling hungry.
Sorry for the depressing diet advice but it’s the only thing that worked for me

@Reduceddutiesboredom

Count your calorie intake and how much you burn - only way to drop the lbs is to be in a deficit. Be sure to tack the calories in butters/ oils/ sauces/ drinks etc as well.

I use MyFitnessPal app to track my calories & protein intake, and track steps (10k a day burns roughly 500 calories!). I went to a PT who worked out how many calories I should be having but I’m pretty sure you can Google something like “maintenance calorie calculator” and then simply subtract 500 from that you’d get a 1-2 loss a week.

I started counting calories 1 week ago. But this is already yielding results.

”get used to feeling hungry”

Please don’t.

If you’re hungry but eating the right amount of calories you’re eating the wrong things. You might feel hungry initially until you learn what foods fill you up properly.

I’ve never heard of nutracheck, but I’ll check it out - sometimes MFP isn’t that accurate when scanning bar codes which is annoying a means I’d spend extra time checking the info.

@MrsOk well done! It’s hard work but definitely worth it. Keep focused on your goal and you’ll get there

@MrsOk, well done for recognising it, tackling it, and having a great first day.
You can do it.

@Reduceddutiesboredom

”get used to feeling hungry”

Please don’t.

If you’re hungry but eating the right amount of calories you’re eating the wrong things. You might feel hungry initially until you learn what foods fill you up properly.

I’ve never heard of nutracheck, but I’ll check it out - sometimes MFP isn’t that accurate when scanning bar codes which is annoying a means I’d spend extra time checking the info.

@MrsOk well done! It’s hard work but definitely worth it. Keep focused on your goal and you’ll get there

I also completely revised my diet.

I agree nutria check is far better than mfp

I’ve lost over a stone in a couple of months from gradually reducing calories, upping fitness and keeping an eye on macros and not eating my exercise.

So I started with 1700 a week the dropped it by 100 calories each week and I’m now on 1200 and comfortable and happy with that.

You need to be in a serious calorie deficit to lose weight - a pound is something like 3000 calories so ignore what exercise your device is telling you you’ve burnt off - it’s unlikely to be that accurate anyway. Then anything you do earn goes towards your deficit.

And try not to focus on how much weight you’re losing to begin with it will go up and down over the weeks it’s best to look at how much you’ve lost over a month, two months, 6 months a year etc.

Good luck!

Another one agreeing that for most women nowadays 2000 calories a day is too high. This number was determined when we largely were much less desk based, walked or cycled more for short journeys etc. If you can fit more movement naturally into your day it's a great place to start, but rigid exercise classes or an hour of running etc can often trigger overeating to compensate so be aware of this. My base metabolic rate is 1400-1500 cals a day, more than this I gain weight, and I actually have what I'd consider a reasonably active job. I've discovered this through years of yo yo ing weight that I couldn't work out, so I ended up tracking and weighing everything (I didn't realise how much I underestimated my portions, ie I thought I was having 200g of lasagne, but I was having 400g). For me to loose weight I need to be below 1200 for a slow steady loss. I don't drink my calories, I have smaller portions of the 'main meal' than I'd naturally choose but eat a lot more vegetables than I think I'd normally put on my plate, I do have a sweet tooth but I have a square or two of dark chocolate or an ice lolly not a pudding or a cake almost every time now. I am a lot happier (no back ache any more, noticeably more energy, more self confidence, much much clearer skin) now at 55kg than I was at 85kg and I intend to maintain myself here so I don't ever have to restrict again.

You'll do great, OP. I'm just getting back 'on it' after a year of letting things slide (but it's been one hell of a year). It is silly really: I feel better almost instantly as soon as I quit sugar and quick carbs. My whole body sort of relaxes and enjoys periods of fasting, whether 5:2 or 18:6, and I can almost see the initial 'unbloating' in the first few days. Someone told me that sugar elicits an inflammatory response in the body, and I can well believe it. Eating becomes very straight forward, and instead of being preoccupied with wishing I had a biscuit with my tea, I don't think much about meals or snacks at all.
If you pre-prepare what you're going to eat and make enough for a few days, you're set. I don't eat until after 12, and make a big batch of delicious coleslaw with homemade kimchi and jalapeños to last for a few days, and have a big helping for lunch together with a boiled egg. For dinner, I cook up a piece of protein and serve with no carbs, but heaps of vegetables, cooked and raw, and make sure I've eaten before 6pm.
Like you, I have caring responsibilities and a demanding job so find it really tricky to fit in exercise. A few years ago I lost 10kg in as many weeks, but had an exercise bike which I used every day. It was brilliant, but sadly took up too much space, so had to go. This time, I am doing late-night constitutionals.
Wishing you all the best, OP.