Help motivate me to lose weight

[MNmonster]

I have always been overweight. I have done every single diet going. Ever. I eventually decided that I am no longer going to diet and accept myself for the person I am. And I have maintained my weight for the first time in my adult life.

But, I have had perimenopause symptoms for about five years now. After my periods stopped for three months, I took myself off to the GP to ask for HRT. I have a history of high blood pressure after having DS2 when I was 35 and was refused the combined pill back then because of this. My blood pressure was high at my appointment yesterday and the GP wants me to lose weight/sort my blood pressure out before prescribing HRT. They also told me that apparently all of my symptoms will disappear once I lose weight, which I'm not sure I believe because I've been fat forever but the sleepless nights only started six months ago and my periods have always been regular. But who am I to question a medical professional.

So I have to lose weight when I don't really want to and my heart isn't in it. Is there anyone who can encourage and motivate me? Tell me all of my problems will be magically solved if I lose weight. Tell me I will feel better in a few months etc. Does anyone have any testimonials of how losing weight made them feel better even when they didn't believe it would.

FWIW, I already exercise regularly. So I already know the benefits of that.

No one?

@MNmonster - Sorry to hear of your woes, being overweight is not fun at all, I know. I am sure that if you did lose a significant amount of weight, then yes, most if not all of your problems will be solved. How much are you looking to lose?

Your journey starts here, writing a post as you have is the very begining, and now you need to look at the next step. Take it all in small strides, don't beat yourself up and don't expect things to change too quickly, slow and steady wins the race. As you lose the pounds, life will get much better, and in turn you will be motivated more and more each day to carry on.

I started a diet on 24th May this year, and have lost 38lbs so far, still have 43lbs to go, but already my life has changed significantly. No matter what, I won't give up and I certainly don't want to go back to my old habits.

Good luck, we are all here for you!

Thank you. My BMI recommends I lose 4 stone. I'm 5'1" and weigh 13 stone. I have always lingered around 11/12 stone and genuinely had no health issues until having my DS2. After having him, I have struggled with all manner of problems which have been brushed off as tiredness and stress with two young kids. My weight peaked at 14 stone after having him before I totally abandoned dieting forever. My health problems were there before I was 14 stone though which is why I am skeptical and frustrated I guess. And haven't really improved in spite of now being a stone lighter than my heaviest.

Very basic advice but get a skipping rope and see whats on pinterest. Every kind of workout you can possibly want is on there. From beginners to HIIT to stretching/yoga type workouts. You can do them at home (if you have the space) the garden maybe... you can plan when you do them and for how long. No competition or crazy harsh personal trainer getting on at you or awful 'gym bunnies' and 'arnie-wannabies' around. Get into something for 21 days and it becomes a habit, you'll see results too i'm sure and you'll begin to enjoy it. Also get good speakers so you can get a motivating playlist going, mines a 90's trance/techno mix and i LOVE it!

I started a healthy eating plan at the start of March. I fully expected any weight loss to be slow, as I was eating a relatively large amount (1700-1800 calories a day). I just couldn’t face a “proper diet” at the time, so felt this was the best I could do. I would have been very happy with a stone off by the end of the year, but to my surprise, I’ve managed to lose more than 3 stone and it’s not even September yet!

All of that is to say that you don’t necessarily need to go crazy and may be able to get some good results by making small, more sustainable changes?

There’s a lot of research out there about the positive effect even losing 5% of your weight has on your overall health. For me personally it’s had a massive impact. I sleep better, have lots more energy, got rid of frequent headaches, massively decreased some digestive issues I was having and sorted a problem I was having my one of my feet. I didn’t have to wait until I lost multiple stones before I started to get those results. It all happened relatively quickly and things have been getting even better since then!

I don’t think you need to see this as a weight loss goal but maybe just an improve your health goal? So look at your life and think about what changes you can make to improve your health and fitness with absolutely no expectation to lose any weight.

Do you exercise? Do you have a period of 12-14 hours without eating or drinking any calories each day (overnight)? Do you eat 5-10 servings of fruits and vegetables each day? Do you drink enough water? Do you eat guy friendly foods like yogurt/kefir/other fermented foods? Do you have some time to relax and unwind most days? Do you each lots of processed foods that you could replace with less processed versions?

You don’t have to actually answer any of those questions but maybe just try thinking about what small changes you can make in your life that might improve your overall health. See it as adding things into your diet rather than restricting to lose weight.

OP, I have been perimenopausal for 5 or 6 years, have had high blood pressure for much longer, and until the start of this year was about 4 stone overweight. Now I am a healthy weight (just - still would like to lose at least half a stone), blood pressure is much lower, and I'm fitter/healthier than I have been in years. My life and health has improved massively in the last 5 months, and where I was previously ill all the time, I now feel well.

However, rather than waiting for HRT, I have only been able to do this because I started HRT. There is no way I would have been able to stick to a diet and exercise before the HRT as I simply felt too ill, all of the time. It took over 2 months for the HRT to settle. When it did, and when I realised I felt better, I then had the energy to start and stick to a diet (WW prescribed by the GP), and to exercise daily. Before the HRT, just getting through each day was a massive struggle and anything more would have been impossible. Can you try and persuade your GP to start you on HRT anyway? It was explained to me that there are slightly higher risks if you are overweight, but these are partly mitigated by using some forms of HRT over others. I forget exactly, but I am on the patches, which I was told by the gynae consultant were better for women who are overweight. I know you wanted pre HRT advice, but honestly, if you can persuade your GP, you may well, like me, find the rest easier.

@Wotsitsarecheesy this is what is bothering me TBH. I feel like crap and don't see how I can motivate myself TBH.

In all honesty, the GP was very dismissive of me needing HRT because of my age (I'm 41) until I said my period was MIA. Even then, I was asked if I was pregnant more than once. I think in some ways I want to lose weight as a way of proving to the GP I still feel like death after losing four stone IYSWIM. The GP wouldn't entertain it until my BP comes down and she wouldn't entertain medicating my BP until I lose weight.

I already exercise 3 times a week doing cardio and I have a routine that I enjoy and will stick to, so don't really want to change that.

My diet is pretty shit TBH. I lack all enthusiasm for cooking and preparing meals and just CBA in general. My kids never used to eat an evening meal with us because they had tea at the childminders. They've stopped going there now and I'm hoping the effort of making something for everyone helps me along.

I definitely drink too much caffeine. So might make that my first thing to change.

@Epponnee I like the idea of looking at one thing at a time, focusing on health etc.

That sounds mad, @MNmonster. I have been on blood pressure medication for years. It does run in the family, but my weight made it worse. There was never any question about the GP not giving me medication because I was overweight though. They just said your blood pressure is extremely high, so you need medication to bring it down to normal levels. Is your GP generally good, or obsturctive?

But it did take me years to get HRT. It just hadn't occurred to me to ask about it. I kept going back to GP for period problems, they'd investigate, say they couldn't find any problems and then I'd go away again, still feeling rubbish, while the GP ignored all my other symptoms. It took a move to a different surgery and a new GP, where I sat down and explained what my day to day life was like, and he referred me to the gynae consultant who suggested HRT as a way of regulating my totally random, far too frequent, perimenopausal periods that gave me migraines. It was a shock to me when suddenly I didn't have to take to my bed 3-4 days every week and didn't feel exhausted the rest of the time. I just realised one day "I feel well". This was a shock, and it struck me that I hadn't felt well for years. My BMI was still over 31 at this point. The diet and exercise began about 2 weeks after my 'feeling well' revelation. I'm doing WW, also prescribed by the same GP because of high blood sugar. It's working great for me, but presumably it doesn't suit you if it's one of the ones you have tried before? For me, I just really regret not researching and then pushing for HRT years ago. It has made such a difference and given me my life back.

Now I'm unsure whether to post this, as I don't think this is giving you the motivation you asked for! I can evangelise about WW though, if it would help . It's been brilliant for me, but I realise not for everyone.

Ooh Crazzzycat yes - I can relate to all those things you said about sleeping better, reducing foot pain, digestive problems gone. Those were definitely benefits of the weightloss rather than the HRT. I cut out caffeine too (used to get papitations but don't now).