How do you lose weight if you're a picky eater?

[wheresmymojo]

I really need to lose weight, a lot of weight. Around 6 stone +.

However I'm a very picky eater and I struggle to find meals I can eat that are also reasonably healthy...

Foods I don't eat:

• Eggs
• Any kind of poultry
• Salmon
• Any kind of lettuce / celery / radish
• Chickpeas
• Soup
• Fresh tuna (tinned is okay)
• I only eat a small amount of meat (once a week max)

Basically at the moment my diet is actually quite restricted and mainly high fat / high carb / high sugar. I eat the same food a lot because I find it hard to think of other things that I want to eat. So at the moment:

• Almond croissants
• Pizza
• Jacket potatoes with cheese or beans
• Bacon sandwiches
• Ready meal veg curry and rice
• Crunchy nut cornflakes / branflakes / weetabix
• Custard choux buns
• Ice cream

Obviously most of this needs to go.

The veg curry is okay if I make it at home and the jacket potatoes. Also the bra flakes and weetabix. I also like fruit and yoghurt and I'm fine with most veg (but never know what to eat it with).

What else do healthy people eat?

My eating habits have been so twisted for so long I don't actually really know what I would eat day to day?

Would you eat lentil daal, that's lovely and healthy?
Stir fries
Soups
Couscous style salads

I couldn't stomach daal or soup.

I guess maybe stir fries could be doable but they'd just be vegetables as I don't eat chicken or anything like that. I start to feel like it's a lot of effort and I'd rather just have a bowl of cereal TBH.

Couscous salads could be possible I suppose.

Ugh...I feel like crying when I think of eating things I don't particularly like

I wish I could just not eat food at all!

Jacket potatoes with baked beans are an old style slimming world staple. If you can get hold of the red days and green days books you could definitely do green days and have this for one meal every day. If you could make a low fat low sugar veg curry / sauce you could have this with pasta (I can’t remember if rice was allowed) if you can stomach that for the second meal. Very boring for you perhaps but maybe doable?

What is it that’s causing your diet to be so restricted? Have your eating habits always been twisted and have you ever had any help with eating in a more healthy way?

A good place to start would be with healthy versions of your current foods, then varying them a bit (different curry sauce, different veg etc).

Quite frankly saying a stir fry is too much effort is an excuse to eat a load of rubbish. Chop vegetables and put them in a hot wok. Move them round. Add sauce. Eat them.

Most people would consider a stir fry to be a pretty easy meal.

If you can't be bothered to do that in order to make sure your own body receives the nutrition it needs to function then you probably should look at getting some counselling.

I'm very picky. Slightly different list to you, but still very fussy. Thanks to lots of people on mn, I've lost 2 stone since February by limiting calories. It's boring, and I miss biscuits and crisps and chocolate and white bread. Plus bacon (eaten only twice) and croissant (ditto) but it is working. My diet is very repetitive, but I'm seeing this as an investment for the long term and it won't be forever. I target 1450 calories per day.

Breakfast: 2 weetabix + 170ml semi skimmed milk
Lunch: sandwich of 2 slices 50/50 bread, 6g Flora light and chicken or ham or smoked salmon (measured portion)
Alternatively I have soup - I know you said you don't like soup - but I normally do chicken (not helpful!) & veg (I can cope with veg if liquidised)

Drinks are water, squash or decaf tea with no more than 30mls of milk. Sometimes I have OJ, but max 100ml. Also Diet Coke.

If I manage a day like the above with no snacks then I find I actually have decent leeway to have almost anything for my main meal. I have to measure portions carefully though.

Meat baked in the oven with herbs is great because there's no cooking oil and virtually no calories from a sauce, for example.

White bread, cheese and therefore pizza are all a disaster for calories. I've had to stop having all of them.

I also often have room for a glass of wine.

For snacks/carb cravings I have water biscuits or oatcakes.

For treats I have chocolate buttons. Small and melt in the mouth so last longer.

Like I said, very boring, but manageable without having to eat a load of veg, pulses and all sorts of things I can't stomach. I know a lot of what I've said you don't like, but perhaps it might give you some ideas for structure, rather than recipe specifics.

Good luck!

@MrsHowell

Quite frankly saying a stir fry is too much effort is an excuse to eat a load of rubbish. Chop vegetables and put them in a hot wok. Move them round. Add sauce. Eat them.

Most people would consider a stir fry to be a pretty easy meal.

If you can't be bothered to do that in order to make sure your own body receives the nutrition it needs to function then you probably should look at getting some counselling.

Well that's not exactly kind or helpful or constructive is it! Why don't you bugger off back to AIBU.

Yes, I definitely do need counselling. Have you tried to get counselling on the NHS?

I have had various eating disorders over my lifetime - anorexia and bulimia when I was in my teens and early twenties. Binge eating disorder since a breakdown from bipolar disorder in my 30's (which caused the weight gain).

I'm not sure I've ever eaten 'normally'.

The restrictions are all psychological and for different reasons.

Some I just don't like (lettuce, celery, radish, salmon). I recently tried to start eating salmon again and managed a couple of meals before it started to make me feel sick.

Others make me feel physically sick (chicken) because I've seen a horrible documentary about chicken and it put me off for life.

Often I will cook a meal for myself & DH and by the time I've cooked it I can't face eating it so just have a bowl of cereal. I don't know why this happens.

It's definitely getting worse over time. I used to eat eggs for example but now that makes me feel sick (the horrible stringy bit you get with the bit of bloody tissue when you've cracked them open, the idea of eating an unfertilised embryo )

I've read that it can take a while before you get to like something - up to 20 times. Ultimately, though, it's up to you. There are one or two things that you like that will help you to lose weight if you eat them: just eat them. If it gets too boring then maybe you will start to eat the things that you are fussy about. What you don't want to do is eat the things that make you fat. There isn't actually any option. Sorry.

Have you tried broth? It doesn't have consistency like the thick soups. I am not fan of them.
You can them put in anything you have basically. Bone broth is nourishing

@MrsHowell

And yes, I realise it may not be much effort for some people.

But with a lifetime of eating disorders plus having bipolar disorder while holding down a professional, well paid job means I don't have the relationship with food most people do, nor do I have much energy to do anything beyond working to keep a roof over my head and trying not to have a breakdown.

Hence this post. I don't think I'd have started this thread if I was 'normal' and didn't need help!

White fish might be good. It's not as strong, good texture, easy to flavour.

You do need the counselling or a professional though. It will make your life easier 🤞

If you dont want to change your habits, major on the helathy bits that you do like..
Jackets and beans - fine
Yogurt and fruit - fine
Grilled bacon and beans - fine
Ready meal veg curry - not great but fine
Bran flakes, fruit n fibre, weetabix, fine
Baked potatoes and tuna - fine
Tined tuna with rice - fine

Not what I would want to eat, but you'll get enough nutrition and if portion sizes are regulated you will lose weight.

Phrases like -Picky/struggle/don't/cant stomach/feel like crying - don't bode well though! It is okay to do things you don't like, you do sound like you are very precious with yourself. What you need is some tough love - from yourself

Maybe it’s better to look at eating a healthy, balanced vegetarian or even vegan diet instead of trying to force yourself to eat things like salmon or eggs.

How much do you have to lose? Where are your calories coming from? Do you think you’d be able to start by cutting how much you’re eating even if expanding what you’re eating is difficult right now?

I should have said, it would be a really good idea to talk to your gp about dieting. If you’ve had eating disorders in the past, it can bring up difficult feelings.

Thanks I think you are right and I just need to come up with a plan to eat what I can that's reasonably healthy even if boring and start from there.

I've never really been interested in breakfast so TBH I'd prefer to skip it and have one less meal to think about.

Lunch I could have fruit and Greek yoghurt or pitta, hummus and Greek salad.

Dinner I could have fish cakes and veg, white fish and veg, I will also eat chilli and bolognese.

Snacks I am happy with carrot sticks and apples.

Perhaps I just need to rinse and repeat this until I get bored of something and then try and find a variation rather than getting overwhelmed trying to think of lots of healthy meals right now.

I tend to cope with repetition of food pretty well (I would happily just have a bowl of cereal for every meal if I could) so I may not get bored anyway.

Have you asked your GP recently for a referral for CBT? What counselling did you have in the past? Speaking to a dietician would be helpful too to learn about healthy eating and how to introduce foods to your diet. Do you have a mental health team who could also advise or help? You can see counselors and dietitians privately whilst waiting for the NHS or there are many youtube videos about food aversions. You have made the 1st step though by realising there is an issue and trying to make changes.

@PurpleDaisies

Maybe it’s better to look at eating a healthy, balanced vegetarian or even vegan diet instead of trying to force yourself to eat things like salmon or eggs.

How much do you have to lose? Where are your calories coming from? Do you think you’d be able to start by cutting how much you’re eating even if expanding what you’re eating is difficult right now?

I have 6 - 8 stone to lose. I'm currently a size 22. I'd be happy to lose 3 stone though and be back to a 16-18.

I put the weight on very rapidly - 6 stone in 5 months due to massive binge eating when I had my breakdown around 8 years ago.

I've worked very hard on stopping binge eating and haven't really done so for around 12 months now. I'm not putting weight on anymore, in fact I've lost a stone naturally from no longer binge eating.

However I am eating enough calories to sustain this weight/only lose a very small amount over time.

My average day would be skipping breakfast, have one wholemeal pitta bread with some grilled bacon, cucumber and a bit of Mayo and then evening can be anything from a bowl of cereal to 3/4 of a pizza and two custard choux buns. So some days my calories are probably under where they should be, and other days way over.

I could just cut down but I'm very conscious that I'm not getting enough fruit and vegetables and honestly a little worried about ending up with bowel cancer or similar from mistreating my body.

I don't know about the eating disorders OP. But you seem to have a sugar addiction - kicking the white carbs, sugar etc will help you.

Other than that, I would suggest fasting and logging meals on myfitnespal or similar. This works for me - I really cba to cook a meal and am happy eating a bowl of cereal and toast. In my view (and I know this isn't actually right by the way), the most important thing is the number of calories you eat - if you have 5 kitkats in a day, that would be ok from a calorie perspective. Food is fuel.

(clearly the ED and the rest is a big factor - so yes a specialist counsellor would probably be the best way forward).

I've had CBT for this issue in the past and it didn't help at all.

Previously I've had every kind of therapy going as I was in The Priory for a few months but I had bigger issues than my diet at that time so the therapy focused on those rather than my eating. At that time I had private healthcare but I don't anymore.

I don't have any contact with anyone other than my GP once a year for my MH. Because I was originally under the care of a private psychiatrist, I have never been under an NHS mental health team. I just turn up for an annual check at my GPs and they continue to prescribe the medication I was put on several years ago. I think I've been too scared to ask for any other kind of MH referral as my life has very nearly fallen apart several times so I'm frankly terrified that if someone else got involved they might 'mess' with my medication so I've just kept my head down and put in my repeat prescriptions. This is obviously fairly irrational!

You can just steam vegetables and early them with rice . I would put some lemon juice and salt on top. You can even get those microwave bags of vegetables to steam in the microwave. It’s not very exciting, and you’d want to be getting protein somewhere else, but it is a way to eat vegetables easily

I hadn’t realised you weren’t still gaining. Well done for getting control of the binges-that’s not easy. I probably wasn’t clear-I meant cutting the junk rather than your food overall. Actually eating lord good food at meal times could help cut the cravings for sugary stuff that’s low in nutritional value.

You’ve said stir fries are things you eat. They’re great for getting loads of veg in and with a different sauce/carb on the side quite easy to get a bit of variety. If effort is an issue, supermarkets do packs of pre chopped veg.

Veg curry is easy to batch cook and freeze in portions so you’ve got some ready to microwave if you’re tempted to just eat choux buns etc.

@HelenHywater

I don't know about the eating disorders OP. But you seem to have a sugar addiction - kicking the white carbs, sugar etc will help you.

Other than that, I would suggest fasting and logging meals on myfitnespal or similar. This works for me - I really cba to cook a meal and am happy eating a bowl of cereal and toast. In my view (and I know this isn't actually right by the way), the most important thing is the number of calories you eat - if you have 5 kitkats in a day, that would be ok from a calorie perspective. Food is fuel.

(clearly the ED and the rest is a big factor - so yes a specialist counsellor would probably be the best way forward).

So I would be happy doing this I think. And chucking in some raw fruit and veg for the fibre as I often suffer terrible constipation from my current diet and I am getting increasingly worried it could lead to bowel cancer or similar.

My DH however gets very antsy about me eating cereal rather than a 'proper' meal.

I try to explain that I realise it's a long way from perfect but surely better than eating a pizza!

He has the 'perfect' nutritionally balanced diet as he's a personal trainer who counts every gram of macros and trains five times a week.

I'm not sure I need a dietician - I know pretty much everything there is to know about nutrition without doing a degree in it. It's definitely not a lack of knowledge that is the problem - it's all psychological.

I do agree that I'm psychologically addicted to sugar/carbs.

I consider that the binge eating when I had a breakdown was exactly the same as an alcoholic or drug addict - instead of using alcohol or drugs to self-medicate, I used food.

When I had my breakdown I would eat unbelievable amounts of junk food so that it would knock me out in a 'food coma' because being hit by that wave of dopamine and drifting off into a dopamine fuelled nap was better than being awake.

However those few months of 'abusing' food have completely twisted my relationship with it (and it wasn't great to begin with).

That's why I believe I have such strong reactions to the idea of changing (wanting to cry) even though I desperately want to change.

Small steps, OP. They are small, but still steps.

Everyone needs a different tempo. Speak to GP about it so you can get reffered somewhere. You already did so much!

I've also remember that when I was young I used to love those fish portions with sauce that were 'boil in the bag'.

Again, not the healthiest thing in the world but would happily eat one of those with veg and rice/jacket potato.

I was looking at the Saxenda thread this weekend and had convinced myself I would order some....then gave myself a good talking to because there is an increased risk of pancreatic cancer which both my father and half-sister (who was only 50!) died of and it's a particularly horrible cancer.