Nothing is working....

[sandwiches77]

I am seriously overweight, as are all the females in my family. Feel like I'm fighting a losing battle, I have tried every diet, stuck to it like glue and no weight loss

Haven't read tge while thread but I'm sure someone's amready mentinoed weighing things religiously. Also, going to your doctor and talking to them. Request a blood test if you can to rule out any thyroid or other issues going on.

First things first please don't beat yourself up for your weight, it is not who you are and hating yourself is not going to fix anything.

So it looks like you have too many calories, for what you are burning.

So let's start with increasing your movement, more footsteps, every hour get up and walk around your office / garden. Let's up your footsteps to start with by 30%.

Next let's look at what food you have and how it makes you feel.

Try to up your protein and be religiously logging / weighing food. So we get a base line. Then look from there the small changes.

You can do this, you can break the cycle

I wouldn't lose any weight if I ate that and I'm active - too many carbs. Crisps are a killer if you're on a diet - don't fill you up at all and lots of calories. I could never eat no carbs but I do reduce them a lot if I want to lose weight - so I probably wouldn't have breakfast to fast, then would have the sandwich with as much added veg and salad as possible, then do courgette bolognese (or if I'd done loads of exercise that day, then say 40g spaghetti and half courgette). That's still quite a lot of carbs... And I'd ditch the crisps and eat full fat natural yoghurt with berries instead as a snack. Basically you need more nutrient dense food which is going to fill you up - "3 meals a day no snacks" will only help to you lose weight if you are very active and have a good handle on portions/the meals are quite low calorie.

We have learned a lot about how our bodies use the calories consumed over the last few years. It’s not just about calories, it’s about what your body does with those calories, and also how foods interact with each other.

Also what works for one person won’t necessarily work for another. Fasting doesn’t suit me, but low glycaemic load does. I also could not be bothered to weigh everything, but I do use smaller 7 or 8 inch plates rather than those large 12 inch dinner plates, and that helps a lot in controlling portion sizes.

When doing family meals avoid putting out the same portion for everyone, a woman needs somewhere between half and two thirds of a man’s daily calorie intake, so adjust accordingly.

I love the low glycaemic diet and once you know what foods are okay then following it becomes very easy. As dark chocolate and high quality ice cream are both low glycaemic load it also doesn’t feel like a restricted diet of deprivation (apart from pizza - that is now a rare biannual treat)

The ‘rules’ I follow are:

• no soup, smoothies or fruit juice (too easy for the body to absorb the calories) instead whole fruit and veg
• no sweeteners or low calorie anything, just use less of the real stuff
• whole grain sour dough bread
• porridge with nuts, seeds etc and while milk for breakfast (one half cup of oats to one half cup of whole milk)
• sweet potato to replace white potatoes
• protein is unlimited, I’m vegetarian so I eat a lot of pulses
• avoid mixing high with high fat (hence pizza is rare treat, and no cheese on that baked sweet potato)
• only one high carb meal a week (e.g. pasta)

Finally find a form of exercise that you like and get hot and sweaty. Get into the mindset that you are doing this because you love yourself and you love your body so want to keep it healthy not because you have been taught by the media and advertising to hate your body.

I also agree with the poster who said don’t weigh yourself too often. As you get fitter your weight may not change but your body composition will.

It’s tough. There is a vast industry out there making a shed load of money off people desperate to lose weight and giving advice that leads to mental health and metabolic issues. I find the advice from fitness ‘gurus’ tends to be better than the advice from diet ‘gurus’ if you have time to spend on google.

But I think the biggest thing is learning to truly love yourself and the body that you have been given. When we are in that mental space, then harming ourselves through over eating or drinking too much, or not exercising or any of the myriad forms of self harm, falls away. Good luck and I hope you find that space.

Sorry my post was so long, having been a bit chunky at one point in my life I get a bit evangelical about this stuff

Can you list how much protein you eat per day?
If you assume that you are insulin resistant (most overweight people are by their 30s/40s according to weightloss doctors - I'm not an expert) you really have to overcome that and it might take months. Anyone eating cereal after a 12 hour overnight fast, followed by crisps, fruit and bread doesn't understand the role of insulin in weightloss.

Also cereal is an awful breakfast for most people trying to lose weight - if you eat the amount which actually fills you up rather than the portion size it's loads of calories and when I eat it I find I'm hungry about an hour later! If you can't cope with eggs all the time, try porridge. Or even one slice of toast with almond butter would fill me up more actually.

All the things you have mentioned work for people if they provide rules which then cause people to take in less calories than they expend...

I also find it helps to batch cook some low calorie lunch/dinners so you know you have something in as I find trying to lose weight can be exhausting just thinking about food all the time. Tomato based curries are good for this (and I also always have cauliflower rice in the freezer which you can mix with normal rice to get more veg and lower the calories).

Losing weight is hard!

As others have said you need to count your calories and work them out to the letter on MFP.The days.food tou describe could easily be near the 3000 calorie mark if large portions/high calorie bread or fillings etc

You are eating a packet of crisps every day - of course you are not losing wait. Eat more fruit and veg and move more.

Hi OP. I give my advice in the very gentlest way as I've been here. What you're currently eating unless you're weighing it could easily be 2500 calories. I look back at exactly the same type of menu and I thought I was eating very little but my shake of the cereal box and a splash of milk was 500 calories. The first time I measured 40g I was aghast. Also a sandwich crisps and fruit even of the lowest calories type is hard to justify when you want to lose weight. My spaghetti Portion is maybe a 3rd of what I used to eat. Maybe you're not doing this but I certainly was without even realising it. Even the 100 calories of semi skimmed milk I put in my tea is logged. It's hard but it really works. I had to learn the hard way that food is 90% of weight loss. Exercise help but way less than you think.

Could you set a goal of low calorie for 6 months. It may be you just need to push the low cal for longer. I would definitely speak to the Gp to get some blood tests for thyroid

Work out your tdee and then reduce calories accordingly by 300-500 calories a day. Weigh and log EVERYTHING you'll be surprised at how much variation there can be in a 'sandwich' depending on type and size of bread, thickness of butter and quantity of filling, could be 300 calories could be 600. Is that a packet of wotsits at 96 calories a packet or Walkers plain grab bag at 260?

Eat nutritionally dense food, particularly up your range and quantity of vegetables and fruit. Lean protein. Fibre.

Consistency. It's long haul. You have to keep going. If you have a 'bad day' don't give up. It's going to take time. Any loss is a good loss even if it's 'only' half a pound.

Forget about the scales and use a tape measure. Weight loss isn't linear. Focus on health and how you feel.

Change your mindset. You're going to have to unpick your feelings, emotions and habits concerning food. It's hard but you are worth it.

My fitness pal has honestly changed my eating habits - I've lost loads of weight without feeling hungry or deprived

@HeadNorth

You are eating a packet of crisps every day - of course you are not losing wait. Eat more fruit and veg and move more.

A packet of crisps is only an extra 100 calories or so if you’re buying the right ones. It’s obviously better to have an apple but in isolation, that’s not going to make you fat.

A pound of weight is 3500 calories. So in a week if you’re over your tdee by 500 calories a day, you’ll gain a pound a week.

You say sandwiches, but how many slices of bread? Most bread slices are around 100 calories per slices so if you have four slices that’s 400 calories more or less. What fillings are on the bread?

As for cereal, when you measure out 30g in a bowl it’s a tiny portion. Pouring out cereal without weighing it would mean way over 30g, probably three times that. Are you adding sugar to the cereal?

Drinks. Tea and coffee with milk and sugar, wine, beer, fizzy drinks and fruit juices all need to be added to the calorie intake.

Misleading food labelling. If you look at a Walkers ready salted sharing pack it says each 30g portion is 156 calories but the whole bag is 175g so the entire bag is almost 1000 calories. They neglect to print the whole calorie content because it might put people off buying them.

Fruit. Calories can vary. 100g of dates have 282 calories whereas cherries have 50 calories per 100g.

See your doctor as suggested and if all is fine download mfp or another calorie counting app.

It's tricky to give advice on weight loss as everyone reacts differently and you have to find what works for you. I tried everything over the years, and have through trial and error found that I have to do a combination of 16:8 + lowish carb (under 60g per day) + calorie counting (1300 per day) to have good success. Any of those things on their own didn't really work, but in combination the weight fell off and has stayed off - although I do still have around 7kgs to go to get to my goal weight.

Once you’ve ruled out thyroid issues and PCOS you can look at trying to find what works for you.

Not everyone thrives on the same thing and you need a food plan that leaves you feeling healthy and well not headachey and weak. If you’ve got a fair amount of weight to lose you need more than a diet - you need to make changes to the way you eat that you’ll keep up long after you get to a weight you’re comfortable with so you can sustain it.

My body seems to need a significant calorie dip + lowish carb to consistently lose weight. I feel awful on Atkins type diets (sluggish and generally bleurgh) but there’s no way in hell I could lose weight on three carby meals a day like cereal, a sandwich and pasta. I know that it should be possible to do so if you count the calories and that lots of women can and do but my body just doesn’t agree. Maybe it’s age (40 ish), hormones or genetics but knowing why wouldn’t change it. I know there are women who can lose weight on 1500 calorie diets but my body doesn’t. It’s so disheartening to stick rigidly to a plan and see no change in weight.

What works for me might not work for you. I don’t eat bread or pasta on a regular basis. I drink lots of water. I try to eat 5 portions of lowish carb veg a day - raw carrot sticks, cucumber sticks, cauliflower, broccoli, tenderstem broccoli, kale, spinach, green beans etc. Half my dinner plate is that kind of veg whether I’m having it with vegetable tagine or veggie sausages. I enjoy it and it fills you up. I have vegetable soup or veg sticks with a measured out amount of hummus for lunch. A couple of times a week I’ll have rice or potatoes with dinner (a quarter of the dinner plate.) I’ll have oatcakes with cream cheese or porridge for breakfast. I calorie count everything when I’m actively losing weight which includes weighing stuff. It can help you readjust your eye to what a ‘portion’ actually looks like and make more considered choices about your food - for equal calories you can drown oatcakes in cream cheese but you can only wave a block of cheddar at them from a distance . At least once a week I have a day where I’ll up my calorie limit by 600 calories and have something I fancy. I save any sweet treats for the evening because if I get near sugar before then I end up feeling ravenous, my willpower drains away and I end up spiralling until I’m reaching for the Nutella and a spoon. The way I eat works for me because it balances eating food I like, feeling good and still being capable of walking the dog for a hour+ with losing enough weight to keep me motivated.

OP, you sound like me when I was overweight. I was convinced I didn't eat too much, and that the exercise I did was ok (I went to the gym 3 or 4x a week..but just went through the motions of BodyPump or Zumba or whatever while I was there!).

It was a combination of things that changed my lifestyle, and made me lose weight and keep it off, but the major one was finally accepting that yes, I was eating too much and no, I wasn't doing enough exercise. There wasn't some huge conspiracy or genetic wizardry or health issue keeping me overweight, as there isn't with the vast majority of people. But it took a long time for me to come to terms with what a normal diet and normal exercise levels meant, after years of being sedentary and eating too much.

People who haven't known me for very long now think I'm one of those people who maintains a size 8 with no effort. It's bollocks though. I run a lot, I don't drink alcohol, I eat small, healthy portions and if I want cake I'll have it - but I won't go all-out.

You'll get loads of responses telling you what to eat, but they all essentially boil down to calories in vs calories out.

I’d recommend Andrew Jenkins book ‘why we eat (too much)’ - lots on the science of how diets increase our weight set points, how our genes affect our weight and our environment (ie type of food available) has gradually made us heavier. Aligns with the Chatterjee message - and I’ve noticed there’s a thread on the book in weight loss chat which I need to check out too! He recommends some steps to reducing our weight set point, including eating 3 nutritious meals a day, cutting sugar and wheat, working on sleep and finding exercise you like and then some bits on omega 6 vs omega 3. Makes sense to me - and you mentioning you’ve tried lots of different diets made me think of it, as each time you diet you raise your weight set point (ie put it all back on again and more) as your metabolism changes - lots on that in the book too

I don't drink alcohol and have suffered with PCOS in the passed

When I don't see results I can do either, stop completely or try something new

Just listening to a podcast with Dr Andrew Jenkins

You said you tried vlcd, did you lose any weight on this or did you lose and then re-gain once you started eating normal foods? If you did not lose weight on 600 calories a day then I would definitely book an appointment with the GP.

Interesting that you suffered from PCOS. There's a link with insulin. If you go on the IF Facebook groups you'll hear lots of stories how PCOS was improved by tackling insulin resistance.

Can tell from some of your responses that you are defensive. Being overweight isn’t a crime. You, your mum and grandma are not bad people or ‘wrong’ in some way because are overweight. It’s not a shameful thing or a point of humiliation. You are still you whether you are big or small, people love you for who you are not because of some ridiculous patriarchal ideal of thinness. Fuck it I say. If you are struggling to exercise then change up and go swimming or yoga. The trick to it all is ENJOY it. Enjoy the exercise you do, enjoy the nourishing food you give your body - fresh veg, fresh fruit, delicious cheese, cake is nourishing for the soul. But if it isn’t, if there’s too much internalised has around ‘bad’ food then find something else you absolutely love! Losing weight is easy. Calories in vs calories out. So why is it a billion pound industry? Because it’s so so hard to unlearn toxic food shit that women inherit through generations. You are loved and the thing that makes you ‘you’ has nothing, NOTHING, to do with what you weigh.

The trouble with such a carby typical day is it just leaves you even more hungry. Try cutting down on that for sure.

Did you honestly not lose anything on a VLCD? If not there is genuinely a medical issue!

If you have PCOS then a low carb will really help you.

We've just started another low carb Bootcamp this week - today is day 2 - so why don't you come and join us? Ten weeks will give you a really good insight into whether it's going to work for you.

Here's a link to the first week's chat thread . You will be very welcome, and will get lots of help and support (as well as banter!)